Healing Alice
by abetternameneeded
Summary: Sequal to "Gothel Raises Alice" This is an AU fanfiction in the same universe as "Gothe Raises Alice." After escaping the tower, Alice has to learn how to function away from Gothel's control. This story is kinda dark.
1. Bathroom

**A/N: This story is a sequal to "Gothel Raises Alice" that story is dark. And this one is also going to be dark. Alice was severly abused to the point she's scared to move around without being told she can. This story is about how she recovers from that. It deals with the psychology of a human that has been put through hell and it's not a gentle story. This story is not for children or anyone that doesn't want to read this kind of thing. This particular chapter contains some mentions of bodily fluids.(pee) K you were warned. **

Alice sat in a chair in the kitchen. She darted her eyes around the room taking in what the new place looked like. She had never left her tower before. And she'd ran away. Left with Robin and gone to where Robin lived. Robin's mother was walking around the room doing whatever it was she was doing. Alice didn't know and she knew better than to ask. She barely spoke. Mother never liked it when she spoke without being spoken to. And she liked it even less when Alice moved without being told to. Alice kept darting her eyes around the room trying to find something, anything to make sense of her new surroundings. There was more furniture here. The kitchen was bigger. Alice wondered how often she'd clean it. Back in the tower it was once a week at least. Unless mother was more angry than usual then it was more. Mother tried to use it as a punishment, and it was. But also Alice didn't mind the cleaning. It was repetitive, sure but it was one of the only times she was allowed to move. She spent most of her time sitting and thinking. Sometimes hoping she could somehow get mother to just stop being angry with her all the time. To stop yelling. To stop hurting her. But it never worked.

Everyone had finished eating after a while and dispersed. Alice had been shown around the tower that was so much bigger than hers. It wasn't a tower but Alice knew nothing else and so thought it was just strange looking tower.

She had found a spot to sit down once she'd been shown around. And Robin sat down next to her to talk to her. Alice was silent. More silent than usual. She trusted Robin but this was a new place and she wasn't sure how Zelena would handle it if she broke any rules. Or if Zelena had more rules than mother. They sat with Robin talking for a while. Zelena came into the kitchen and Alice glanced at her. Was she in trouble already? No. She hadn't done anything yet. Had she?

Alice sat uncomfortably in the middle of the living room. Everyone had continued about their days. This wasn't new to Alice. Mother ignored her when it suited her. There was a pain in her lower body. She needed to pee. Badly. She had for a while. But no one had told her she could. And she didn't like to speak. When it got bad enough and mother was distracted by her plants or potions, Alice would ask if she could use the bathroom. But she would often hold it. It causing her pain afterwards. A pain that eventually went away on its own. It was better than asking. Mother hated when she asked questions. And she made sure Alice knew that. So Alice sat with her legs held tightly together and her knees pulled up to her chest, her jaw clenched in discomfort. It was fine.

"Alice, we're about to eat dinner," Zelena told her. "Do you want to join us?"

Alice nodded. She didn't want to get up. She had to use the bathroom so badly. But she had often heard orders phrased as questions. A trick to get her to accidentally disobey, giving mother a reason to punish her. Alice stood up. It _hurt_. She walked over into the kitchen and sat down. Accepting the food offered to her with a nod. She tried to eat, really. But every slight move forced more pain in her body. She held her legs together. She would not pee right here. That would only end in pain. Even if it was an accident. And mother always told her there was no such thing as accidents. Not when Alice did things. She always knew better than to do anything by "accident." Alice was in pain now. It was getting worse.

Zelena glanced at the blonde teenage across from her. She looked miserable. She kept adjusting in her seat and glancing around the room. Holding herself in a tight space, her legs crossed and body hunched over.

"You don't have to sit like that," Zelena told her assuming it was just a strange habit. Alice took it as an order. Anything said to her was usually not a mere suggestion. And she was used to discomfort. Mother had used it to keep her under control in so many ways for as long as she could remeber. And even before then.

Alice nodded her head. She was in a level of pain beyond words now. She unfolded herself but kept her stomach clenched and reclenched her jaw, repeating to herself that she had to wait. She couldn't ask. And she certainly couldn't just go.

Regina entered the room and looked at Alice. Alice hoped no one was going to ask her to do anything. Regina saw how uncomfortable Alice looked.

"Are you okay, Alice?"

Alice nodded. She wasn't allowed not to be. Unless mother wanted her to not be. "You don't look okay. Are you sure?"

Alice nodded. She was fine. It hurt but she was fine. She'd lived through this before. She'd be fine once she went to the bathroom. She was just waiting for Zelena to tell her she could. Were they not going to? Would she have to hold it until she couldn't? She really didn't want this to be how she found out just how bad Zelena would punish her when it came to it.

Robin watched as Alice wiggled around and held herself as if she was trying to find a way to do something specific without doing it. Was something wrong? And if so, what?

"Alice," Zelena adressed her. Alice's eyes looked at the wood of the table. Mother only spoke to her to tell her what to do most of the time.

Zelena glanced at the half empty plate in front of her. She had food. "Do you not like the food? I can make something else," Zelena offered. Alice shook her head. It wasn't the food she just really really needed to pee.

Zelena glanced at the table again and saw she didn't have a cup. Everyone else had just filled theirs when they came over but Alice hadn't.

Zelena turned on the sink. Alice held in the wail of pain she wanted to let out. The sound of the water entering the cup making everything about the situation worse. Zelena set the cup in front of her and Alice stared at it.

"There you go, guess we didn't tell you where the cups were." Alice continued to stare at the glass. She just wanted to use the bathroom. Did Zelena want her to drink the water first? Alice picked up the glass, having a hard time holding onto it. She set it down and shook her head. She couldn't do it. She was in too much pain.

"Okay, that's fine. But what is it, Alice?"

Robin pulled the deck of cards out of whereever they'd been and started to deal them out. "Do you want to play?" Robin offered. It didn't make sense but it was all Robin could think of. Alice shook her head and flinched away. Wouldn't Zelena be angry if she tried to play right in front of her?

Alice couldn't take it anymore. It hurt. It hurt more than she could handle and she let out a quiet moan. She flinched away and let her eyes dart over to Zelena. This was bad. She'd made a noise. She wasn't supposed to make noise. She was allowed to answer mother's direct questions and that was it. She was supposed to stay quiet. How had she made such a mistake?

"Alice, are you in pain?" Zelena asked her. Alice was likely already in trouble and lying wouldn't do her any more good than telling the truth. So she decided to answer honestly. She nodded.

Zelena couldn't think of what could possibly be the problem. Alice had food and water and had been offered her favorite game and had wanted none of those things. Zelena thought about something Robin had said when she was begging her mom to help Alice. _"I don't even think she's allowed to go to the **bathroom** without asking first." _Zelena was sure this couldn't be entirely true. But from what she'd seen of the girl in the few hours she'd been around her she was scared it might have been. She did remeber Robin making similar momevents as a toddler when she had to wait until they could get to a bathroom. It had never progressed anywhere near this far.

"Do you need to pee?" Zelena asked. Alice nodded. Asking her if she needed to wasn't permission. "Oh, go ahead. Do you remeber where it is?" Alice nodded and stood up and walked to it. She needed to go so badly she wanted to run but knew better than to try that. Alice entered the bathroom and sat down on the toilet and emptied the contents of her bladder. As she did, she felt a pain as she released muscles she'd been clenching for far too long. When she finished she got up, washed her hands, and then sat down. Sometimes mother would let her know it was okay to leave the bathroom when she finished. Other times she wouldn't. There had been many times she had fallen asleep forgotton about until mother tripped over her sleeping form. And so Alice waited.

"Is she going to come out of the bathroom?" Henry asked Robin. She was the only one who knew enough about how Alice behaved so far.

Robin shrugged. "I'll go check on her."

Robin walked into the bathroom and saw Alice sitting with her back against the wall and her side preseed up against the cabinet underneth the sink. Alice knees were pulled up to her chest.

Robin sat down next to her. "Hey, Alice."

Alice didn't respond. She feared Zelena's reaction if she did. "Are you going to come out of here?" Robin asked her. Alice shook her head violently. Robin recongized the reaction. "You're allowed to."

Alice looked at Robin. She couldn't tell her what she was and wasn't allowed to do.

"Would it help if my mom said you could?" Robin asked, hoping that Alice didn't intend to stay confined in the bathroom until Alice's mother told her she could move.

Alice nodded. Zelena was Robin's mother. She was close enough. She needed to listen to her. She was who could choose how to deal with her.

"Okay, I'll go get her. Robin walked back into the kitchen and returned with Zelena.

"You can come out of there, Alice." Alice nodded and exited the bathroom.

The rest of the day passed with Alice constantly looking around the living room as she sat in it.

**A/N: This is going to be a multiple chapter fic and it is going to take time for Alice to even start to come out of her shell. Gothel was vile in the first story and this one will explore it more through the after effects. I take prompts. And if it can't fit into my plan for this sotry I will write a standalone. **

**Thanks to bstormhands for the idea for this chapter. And thanks to Stacey Dawe for several ideas in relation to this story and the idea for the first one in the series.**


	2. The Fort

Alice was still sitting in the living room. She glanced around it yet again. Robin was sitting across from her talking to her. Alice was listening, mostly. But she didn't like sitting like this. She rarely sat with all of her body open and exposed like this. Usually she was against some kind of wall or behind a piece of furniture. She felt exposed. The walls didn't really provide her any true safety from mother but they made her feel safer. And mother never bothered her when she was in her corner. And only bothered her if she needed to get passed her when she was on the windowsill. The only time she sat exposed like this was when mother was angry with her and ordered her to stay put wherever she already was. Or when mother went to bed before telling Alice she could. Alice kept glancing around the room, watching Zelena but trying not to let her see that she was watching her.

"Alice, I'm kind of tired. Are you ready for bed?" Robin asked her. They, just Robin really, had been talking for a few hours. Alice nodded. "Does my mom have to tell you can?" Robin asked.

Alice shook her head. Mother didn't much care where Alice slept as long as she didn't move unless she'd been told to.

"Okay, good night," Robin told her walking to her own room. They had shown Alice her room early that morning. Everyone went to bed but Zelena didn't think she needed to tell her where the room was again.

Alice stared at the couch. She could reach it if she stretched far enough. She stayed seated as she reached her arm over and grabbed ahold of a blanket that was thrown haphazardly on the edge of the couch. She was allowed to do this as long as she didn't have to stand up to do so. She yanked the blanket of the couch and wrapped it around her. Alice curled into herself. She could sleep like this but it wasn't as comfortable. She missed being able to run her hand along the stones in the tower. She missed being hidden. When mother couldn't see her she ignored her unless she was needed. She wanted to be hidden but she couldn't. So she slept as best as she could and woke up when she did. She sat up and adjusted herself into her prefered position with her legs curled into her chest. She folded the blanket neatly and set it beside her. She wouldn't be able to put it away without moving. She liked sitting this way. It made a mock wall for her to press up against. And hugging her legs provided her with a comfort she didn't understand she'd never been given by her mother.

Robin was the first to reenter the room.

"Good morning," she greeted. Alice nodded her response to the greeting.

"Did you sleep well?" Alice nodded. Mostly. Robin noticed the folded blanket next to Alice. "Did you sleep in here?"

Alice nodded. "Alice, did we show your your room?" Robin questioned. She was concerned they'd forgotten to show Alice the room they'd set up for her. It had a table for cards and a really soft rug on the floor since Alice seemed to spend most of her time on the floor. The bed was covered in pillows and there were plenty of blankets. Robin knew Alice seemed to like blankets. Or at least there were several crumpled together in a nestlike formation in the corner of the tower Alice spent a lot of her time in. Alice nodded again.

"Alice, you can sleep in your room, you know." Alice watched as Robin grabbed food from the kitchen. She came into the living room and set some in front of Alice. Robin knew her telling her wouldn't work but maybe she'd think about it.

Alice nodded her thanks and ate.

"Good morning Robin, good morning Alice," Zelena said as she entered the room a little while later. Alice flinched. Why was she being spoken to. What had she not done? Or done? Both things would anger mother. She sat there staring at the floor waiting for an answer to her question. With mother one would always come eventuallly.

"Hi mom," Robin told her. Alice accepted that this time she wasn't going to find out what she'd had done immediatly. If at all.

Robin stood up to go put her dish in the kitchen. Alice knew she'd need to do the same thing eventually.

Zelena remebered the disaster from the day before. "Alice, do you need to use the bathroom?"

Alice nodded. She hadn't thought about it yet but she hadn't been since the night before. She could hold it a long time when she had to but if she was being told to go she would. "Go ahead, then" Zelena smiled at her and Alice went to the bathroom. She sat down afterwards and found comfort in the small space. She hoped no one would bother her. She just wanted to sit alone with her thoughts and try to figure out if there were any new rules here.

Zelena came and found her a few minutes after she sat down. "You can come out, you know." Alice left the bathroom and darted her eyes around. Zelena hadn't said where she could go. She stood on the outside of the bathroom as Zelena walked away. Okay, here was fine. Alice sat down with her back against the wall in the hallway. She listened as everyone moved around and started to fall into her thoughts. She sat there for a while, distracting herself with thoughts of what it'd be like to go outside or to run or jump. She snuck the movment in every so often at one point but she wouldn't do that here. She didn't know how angry Zelena would be if she was caught.

"Hey, Alice," Henry greeted when he walked out of his room and nearly ran into her. She mostly ignored him. She listened, fearful of the fact he was standing above her but didn't bother with any response at all.

"Did you eat yet?" he asked her. She nodded. Henry didn't know how to respond to the silence. He'd spent most of his life with a large extended family. "I'm going to go eat."

Henry entered the kitchen and saw an empty plate sitting in the living room. Alice. She was the only one that wouldn't know where to put it away. He picked it up and set in the sink.

"Henry, have you seen Alice?" Zelena asked. It'd been a little while and no one had seen her after Zelena had coaxed her out of the bathroom.

"Yeah, she was sitting outside of the bathroom."

"Alice," Zelena told her when she entered the hall again. "You don't have to stay right there. You can join us."

Alice nodded and followed Zelena into the kitchen, she sat down.

"Have you eaten?" Zelena asked her. She nodded. Oh, she needed to put the plate away once she was told she could. She glanced into the living room. It wasn't there any more. Had someone had to clean up after her? It wasn't supposed to work that way!

"Sorry." Alice's voice was a whisper but this was a word mother tended to want to hear.

"For what?" Zelena asked. The girl had been silent and still for nearly the entire time she'd been there, there couldn't possibly have been anything she'd done.

Alice shook her head. She wasn't supposed to explain. Just apologize. "Sorry."

"You having nothing to be sorry for," Zelena told her. Alice didn't believe her but nodded. She wouldn't argue with her.

Everyone finished their breakfast then dispersed. Zelena adressed Alice. Zelena turned the sink on to wash the dishes. That was Alice's job. She watched her and waited for instructions that wouldn't come.

Zelena finished tidying up and saw that Alice was still sitting on the kitchen chair staring at the wooden table in front of her. Was she waiting to be told what to do?

"Alice, you can go wherever you want to go. You don't have to wait," Zelena hoped this would work. Alice nodded. She made her way to the corner hidden behind a part of the couch she'd noticed and sat down with her back against part of the wall. She curled her knees up to her chest and let herself get lost in her thoughts. She could imagine what the world normally looked like outside of her window. She didn't have words for most of the things. Mother hated when she'd ask questions. But she sat and pretended to be watching the world outside of her windowsill.

This was repeated until the end of the day. Zelena would have to coax her out of the corner. Alice didn't like this as much. Mother always let her have the corner to herself. She never bothered her when she was there unless she needed her and she'd just say that she did; she never approached the space. But this was still the closest thing to something familar she had in this big new place. And she was scared. She hadn't made themm too angry, yet. But she was sure she'd make them angry soon enough.

Zelena was at a loss for words, a difficult task to accomplish. The girl that was around the age of her own daughter seemed to believe she needed permission to do anything. And she'd latched onto Zelena as an authority figure in the abscene of the woman that had treated her in such a way. Zelena had tried to tell her she could just go wherver she wanted; but, Alice had taken that as permission for just that moment. They needed to find a way to get her to do things without being told she could.

"Alice, do you want to go to bed?" Alice nodded. "Okay. Go ahead." Alice nodded again. Zelena hated telling her what to do. It felt wrong. Alice knew where her room was but wasn't sure if that's where she was supposed to sleep. Zelena's back was turned as Alice crawled into the corner of the living room. She curled up and fell asleep.

The next morning Zelena opened the door to Alice's room and noticed she was nowhere to be seen. She looked underneath the bed and inside the closet noticing that Alice had a habit of trying to find the smallest spaces she could sit in and Zelena had told her to go to bed. Not that it had to be in her bed.

Zelena couldn't find her

"Alice?" she called into the room. No response, not that Zelena had really expected one.

When Robin woke up she saw Zelena walking around the house, looking worried.

"What's wrong, mom?"

"I can't find Alice. She wasn't in her room."

"I think I know where she is," Robin told her. Robin walked over to the corner.

Alice was still curled up asleep. Robin backed away, trying not to wake her. She tripped and made a noise. Alice woke up.

"Hey, Alice," Robin greeted. Alice heard her. She adjusted herself into a sitting position.

Zelena came over a little while later. "Hey, you can come out."

Alice crawled out of the corner. "I'm going to go get breakfast started," Alice nodded. Waiting for more instructions.

"Uhhh, mom?" Robin reminded her.

"Oh, right. Alice you can come into the kitchen, if you want to."

Alice nodded and did. She sat in her seat and watched as Robin talked to her.

"Did you sleep in that corner?" Zelena asked.

Alice nodded. That was okay, wasn't it?

"You don't have to that. You can sleep in your room if you want to." Alice nodded. She didn't want to. The room was bigger than the entire tower and it scared her. But she couldn't ignore her.

They ate and everyone went about their days. Occasionally, Zelena would have to think about if there was anything specific Alice might need and not be willing to ask for and then offer it to her.

By the time night fell Alice was exhausted. She hadn't done much of anything but Robin had spent most of the day talking to her. Something she wasn't used to.

"Are you ready for bed?" Zelena asked after Alice had used the bathroom. Zelena held in her curse at the fact Alice would wait until she was told she could leave the bathroom. Alice nodded. She sat there waiting for Zelena to say more. "Oh right, go ahead then." Alice nodded. She walked into her room. She didn't want to sleep in here. It was scary. It was so much bigger than what she was used to. There were blankets all over the bed but she didn't use the bed. That was for mother. She grabbed the blankets and dragged them into the corner of the room. She'd moved a bit more than she should have but it was the only way to do what she was supposed to. She crumpled the blankets up and tossed one over her. She went to sleep with silent tears in her eyes. Everything was new and everything was scary. Everything was so big.

The next morning, Robin was the first one to be awake. She peaked into Alice room and saw the pile of blankets. Alice was now sitting on top of them.

"Good morning, Alice," Robin greeted. Alice just nodded. She couldn't talk to her right now.

Robin noticed that the bed looked like it hadn't even been unmade. Zelena entered the room. "Good morning."

Alice darted her eyes around the room more. She wasn't sure what Zelena wanted her to do. She was scared. And this room was so big. She missed being able to curl up in the corner of her tower where mother wouldn't really bother her. And it'd been days since she'd been able to do anything besides sleep, eat, and use the bathroom. At least mother let her clean sometimes. Alice was getting restless. But she couldn't say anything.

"You can go to the bathroom," Zelena told her thinking the worry in her face was the start of her needing to use the restroom. Alice nodded and did. Zelena waited outside the door until she heard the sink turn off then told her it was okay to leave, and then okay to go into the kitchen. It had taken a few days but Zelena had learned what Alice would and wouldn't wait for permission for. So far, there was nothing in the latter category. Zelena considered Alice choosing what part of the bedroom to sleep in a very small victory.

During breakfast everyone tried to make conversation.

"Did you sleep well?" Zelena asked. Alice ignored her. No one was directly talking to her. She sat and ate her breakfast.

"Alice? Did you sleep well?" Alice nodded. She slept as best as she was going to in the space she'd been in.

"Okay."

Once Zelena told her she could go where she wanted to she went and hid in the corner of the living room. Robin soon joined her.

"Did you actually sleep well?" Robin asked. She'd noticed that Alice tended to be too scared of her mom to come even close to saying something was wrong in front of her.

Alice shook her head.

"What was wrong?"

Alice had spoken to Robin before, and if she whispered Zelena would never have to know. "big." Alice looked towards her knees that were curled up to her chest as she said this.

"Is it too big?" Robin asked. Alice nodded.

"Where would you prefer to sleep?" Robin asked. Alice was comfortable in this small corner. It was smaller and it felt close to familar when nothing else did.

She pointed to the floor. One word was all she could manage and that had been difficult enough.

"Right here?" Alice nodded. "Okay."

Robin stood up, "I'll be right back."

Alice nodded. Robin darted off down the hallway and into Alice's room. Robin gathered all of the blankets that Alice had put into the corner of the room and brought them back.

"Here you go," Robin told her. "You can sleep wherever you want to." Alice shook her head. Robin couldn't tell her that. "And I can get my mom to tell you that if it'll make you feel better." Alice nodded.

Zelena did tell Alice it was okay to sleep in the little corner. Robin helped Alice create a fort out of pillows and blankets just behind the couch with a blanket draped over the top of the couch, making it impossible for anyone to stand over her when she was in there.

And the fort became Alice's room.


	3. Clean

It had taken a few days but they had settled into their new not-really-that-normal. Alice relied on Zelena for _everything_, much to the latter's dismay. Zelena had been shocked to learn the extent that the teenager expecteed her life to be dictated. She had to be told she could eat, that she could go to the bathroom, that she could go to sleep, that she could come out of her "room", that she could go into her "room." The list was exhaustive and nothing Zelena had tried so far had made her believe that it was okay to not wait for permission for any of these things. It had taken a few days to adjust to this. And Alice only seemed to believe Zelena had any ability to tell her what to do. It had quickly become exhausting to have to guess if there was anything she might need. It was worse to think of why Alice behaved this way. What had that woman _done_ to her?

Everyone sat at the table, eating.

"I'd say the kitchen looks pretty clean," Zelena complimented. Henry had offered to help her the night before. Alice nodded. Clean. Finally. She'd get to do what she was supposed to here. Alice stood up from her seat immedaitly , careful not to be too quick about it. Mother hated when she jumped. There wasn't anything that needed to be cleaned but Alice knew better than to argue. She walked over to the counter and grabbed a rag, wetting it. She glanced at Zelena making sure this was okay. There had been a few times mother had asked her to clean something in the tower but made her stay seated while she did it, crawling around on her hands and knees while her mother sneered about what exactly Alice had done wrong.

Zelena watched as Alice, the same girl who had sat in her seat for hours and had waited until she'd been moaning in pain before using the bathroom seemed to do something she hadn't been asked to. Was Alice already over being told what to do? Zelena hoped so, but knew that wasn't likely the case.

"What are you doing?" Zelena asked gently as Alice was wiping down one of the counters. She didn't expect an answer. Alice heard the direct question. This was one mother made her answer frequently.

"Cl..cleaning," she mumbled. Zelena thought for a moment. She and Henry had just cleaned it the night before.

"Why?"

"You..." Alice trailed off. No that would be a defense. That would be explaining. "Sorry." Zelena thought, had she said something that made Alice want to do this? She'd said _clean_. Robin had said the girl's "mother" made her clean a lot. She'd have to be careful not to say it around her.

Alice flinched and braced herself for the expected pain that didn't come.

"No, you don't have to be sorry. Do you want to finish your food?" Alice nodded. No, she didn't. She'd finally been asked to clean but then Zelena didn't _want_ her to right then? It was confusing. Whenever mother said clean she meant to do it right then. And she didn't take to Alice waiting to do it kindly. Alice shook slightly as she sat back down and finished her food. Wasn't Zelena going to hurt her for being wrong about what she wanted? Or at least yell? The day carried on and Alice worried about what was taking Zelena so long to decide to find a way to punish her for her mistake. She wasn't allowed to make mistakes. The day ended and Zelena never even mentioned the incident again.

Alice watched as Zelena was cooking. Maybe she'd actually get to clean this mess? Alice hadn't been able to move as freely since she'd gotten here. She missed being able to clean. It had been the closest thing to freely moving about the tower she had ever had. She had come close a few days before but she'd been wrong about what Zelena had wanted. Nothing happened. Alice was still confused. Why hadn't anything happened?

Zelena noticed that Alice was watching her.

"Do you need something?" Zelena asked her. Alice shook her head. "You can tell me if you do." Zelena was begging, no _pleading_ with her. Zelena wanted Alice to just make at least one of her needs known. She didn't expect words to come out of Alice's mouth but maybe just maybe she'd tell her if she needed something. Mother had rarely allowed Alice to say she needed things.

Alice shook her head again. She just wanted to do _something_.

Zelena set food in front of her, ignoring Alice's flinch. Zelena had some words she'd like to say to the girl's so-called-mother.

"I need to go to the market today, will you be okay here for a while?" Zelena asked. No one had left the house much for the past few days. They'd been trying to adjust to having Alice there, and once they'd realized how little she'd do without being told she could leaving her alone seemed like a bad choice. But now it couldn't be avoided. Zelena didn't think Alice would be able to handle the amount of people at the market just yet.

Alice nodded. Mother had left her in the tower alone often. And maybe Robin would be here and they could play? Robin would know when Zelena would get back.

"It'll be just you, is that okay?" Alice nodded. She could handle a few hours alone.

Zelena told her she could go to the bathroom and Alice did. Then she dismissed her from there. Zelena thought about where the safest place for her to stay would be and elected the kitchen, she hated the thought of Alice sitting and refusing to move for any amount of time but at least if she was in the kitchen she _might_ choose to get food if she needed it. And, at this point Zelena would be thrilled if she'd so much as pee in the bloody sink! Or the floor, for gods' sake if she'd just do it without waiting for Zelena's permission.

"I'll only be gone a few hours. I'm leaving now" Zelena told her as she left.

"Ok," Alice whispered. Mother had often wanted Alice to acknowledge her as she was leaving. Zelena took it as a small victory that Alice would say a word to her that wasn't part of an apology, even though it sounded like it might have been rooted in fear from something her mother had conditioned her to do.

Alice sat in the kitchen staring at the dishes in the sink and the dirt on the floor. Mother usually told her to clean before she left. And Zelena hadn't said she had to stay in one place. Alice knew better than to leave the space she'd been left in. But wouldn't she _want_ a clean kitchen? She was supposed to do this. But she also wasn't. Alice alternated her glance between the sink and the door. Sink. Door. Sink. Door. Sink. Door. Sink. Yes. Sink. Alice made her choice. She shakily stood up and walked to the sink. She turned the water on, she peered over her shoulder. She grabbed the soap, another look towards the door. She washed one plate, another glance. Another plate. Another glance. And on it went until all of the dishes had been washed, rinsed, and put into the drainer. She didn't know how to put them away. She sat back down in the place she'd started in, her back towards the wall. No one would know. The dishes! Oh, they'd be a giveaway. What had she done? Maybe she wouldn't mind? But maybe she would? Alice shook her head. She couldn't think about what Zelena would do when she got home. She buried her face into her knees, hugging them to her chest. She could take it. Couldn't she? Alice considered undoing everything. But she couldn't remeber exactly which dish had been where and mother had always noticed when she undid things. That had only made her angrier. Alice let silent tears fall onto the skirt of her dress.

Henry walked into the kitchen, he'd been the only one home other than Alice. He'd been outside taking care of some of the animals.

"Hey, Alice," he greeted sitting down in front of her. He noticed the tear stains in her eyes.

"Are you okay?"

Alice nodded. She didn't know Henry that well. "Are you sure? You look like you've been crying?"

Alice shook her head violentally. She wasn't allowed to cry. She always hid it when she did. She was already in so much trouble. "Alice, it's okay. You're allowed to cry."

He didn't know what she'd been crying about but hoped his words would bring some vaugue sense of comfort.

Robin returned before Zelena did and saw Alice and Henry sitting in the corner of the kitchen.

"Alice," Robin remebered that her mom was gone and knew Alice had been willing to play games whenever her own mother had been out of the tower. She wouldn't push it too far. Alice was still adjusting to this place and if they scared her too much they'd lose her trust. "Do you want to play a round or two of cards?"

Alice nodded. She did. And Zelena would be gone a little longer. They managed to rope Henry into it as well. They played a few rounds before putting the cards away.

Zelena came home to a spotless kitchen. The only person that had been home long enough to do this was Alice. Zelena was proud of her. She'd done something without anyone telling her she had to. That was one thing in the so far otherwise empty list. Alice would clean without being told to. It wasn't much but it was something. Zelena was proud of her. But she wasn't sure if she should voice this or not. This was good. No this was bloody brilliant. But would Alice stop doing it if she thought Zelena knew? She'd ignore it this time. But she'd try to reward her for the behavior. Did Alice actually like anything? Zelena remebered Robin mention playing cards with her.

"Alice," Alice flinched was she in trouble? "Do you want to go play cards with Robin?"

Alice was confused. She'd moved and she'd left evidence of it but Zelena hadn't seemed to _notice_. Was it okay if she cleaned if no one saw? Alice hoped so. She found something about the repetitive movements calming. It was a place for her desire to move around to go. One that wouldn't end in pain either from her falling or mother finding out about it.

Alice nodded her response to Zelena's question. She did want to play with Robin. But, shouldn't she been in trouble for moving? Zelena seemed to not be upset. Alice walked into the living room where Robin was and sat in front of her.

"Hi, Alice." Alice nodded at her. It was the closest thing to a greeting she was going to give. "What'd you want to do?"

Alice shook her head. She couldn't tell her. But Zelena had told her to do this.

"Want to play a game?" Robin offered. Alice nodded. Zelena watched from the kitchen as Robin, Henry, and Alice sat engrossed in their card game. It was a start. Alice was doing _something_ besides hiding in one of the various corners of the house.

The next time Alice was in the house alone she cleaned in the kitchen again. She had seen everyone else put things away and had remebered where they went. She was sat back in the kitchen corner by the time anyone would notice. And no one said anything. She spent part of her time cleaning worrying about if she got caught. Zelena didn't say anything the next time either. Or the next. Or the next. She just offered Alice what she thought she needed and they carried on.

This went on for a while. Zelena knew that Alice had been cleaning whenever she was gone. And so she started to leave the smallest of things for her to do after making sure no one left any large messes. It wasn't Alice's job to clean up after them but leaving little things for her to do seemed to be the only way she'd move if Zelena hadn't told her she could.

Whenever Zelena was gone, she'd clean. She'd stop if Robin, Regina, or Henry could see her so they'd often hide in their own rooms for a short time to allow her this small peace. Alice knew Zelena must know what she'd been doing, but she hadn't said anything. So it was okay, wasn't it? She was still scared of getting caught and so spent much of the time she was cleaning watching the door over her shoulder.

Zelena soon realized that this course of action wouldn't work in the long run. As far as Alice knew, she just wasn't getting caught. And Zelena wanted her to be able to move on her own in front of other people.

Zelena left a few dishes in the sink the next time she left. She told Alice how long she'd be gone. And Alice did what she'd been doing for a few weeks.

Zelena came home to Alice sitting in the kitchen corner and the dishes put in their proper places.

Zelena thought carefully about how she phrased the words. If she said the word clean Alice would take it as an order and Zelena wanted the opposite of that.

Zelena sat down across from Alice. She didn't get too close as she'd quickly learned Alice didn't feel comfortable being too close to her.

"This looks really good," Alice knew the word good. Robin said it when they played. But what looked good? "The kitchen, you did it good." Zelena adressed the question. Alice shook and pulled her legs closer to her chest. Zelena knew what she'd done. She was in so much trouble. "Thank-you."

Alice blinked. She said that, not the other way around. "It's good," Zelena told her again watching as Alice's eyes darted around the room as they tended to do. Alice was confused. She'd broken at least two rules and Zelena was telling her it was good. Alice nodded, she wasn't sure what else to do.

"Do you want to go play with Robin?" Zelena offered. She wished she could get Alice to do more on her own but maybe offering her something fun would work. Alice nodded and did as Zelena asked.

It was a step further in the right direction. Zelena hoped this would calm Alice's nerves.

The next time Zelena was gone Alice was slightly more comfortable with moving around. She only cleaned the kitchen then curled back into the corner of the kitchen but wasn't as scared when Zelena came home. Zelena told her she did a good job and asked her if she wanted to play a game. This seemed to ease Alice's worries but Zelena couldn't get Alice to move on her own in front of anyone. And whenever Zelena told her to go wherever she wanted it only resulted in Alice thinking she just meant it as an order for the moment, and wouldn't do it unless Zelena was there or told her to do it as she was leaving. Zelena let out a sigh, there had to be some way to get her to move on her own. Zelena thought about it some and had an idea. She'd try it the next time she left the house.


	4. Not Here

**A/N: To any guest reviewers that couldn't reiew a few chapters back: SORRY, my bad. Clicked the wrong button and disabled guest reviews when trying to do something else. It's fixed now. On with the story. Thanks to bstormhands for the help with this story again**

Zelena _finally_ had a idea. She wanted Alice to do something, _anything_ besides cleaning without waiting for her to tell her she could. And she thought her plan was flawless. Alice tended to stay hidden inside two of the corners of the house. And that was fine but Alice needed to move. She needed to be able to do things without waiting for Zelena. There had already been a disaster with Alice needing the bathroom. And a teenage girl should not be waiting for _anyone's_ permission to do that. So if she could just get her to stay away from the space that she hid in maybe she'd move around a bit?

Zelena crouched down next to the little corner Alice liked to sleep in. It had quickly become Alice's room once they realized she didn't like the guest room they'd offered her. She had told Robin it was too big and Zelena told her it was fine if she wanted to sleep here. The area was filled with pillows and blankets and had a blanket thrown over the top.

"Hey, Alice" Alice looked at her. Did she need something? She waited for some kind of instruction.

"I'm going to be gone a little while, okay?"

Alice nodded. What was she supposed to do?

"You can do anything, you just can't stay in your room." Zelena thought this was a clear enough request. This way Alice wouldn't just sit in the corner of the living room until she got home. She'd be able to go get food or go to the bathroom if she needed to. And she wouldn't think she had to clean whatever was closest to her.

Zelena got up and left right after telling Alice what she expected her to do while she was gone.

Alice was confused. Do what? What was she supposed to do? She crawled out of her little corner and pressed her back up against the wall. This was a weird request. Mother always told her where to go and what to do. She never told her what not to do unless she was already doing it.

Alice glanced around the room. What did Zelena want her to do? She hadn't made it clear. She needed to do whatever it was Zelena wanted. She didn't know what she wanted. Alice started to have a hard time breathing. In. Out. In. Out. She was okay. This was scary but she could handle it for now, couldn't she? She focused her eyes onto the door, she'd see when Zelena came back.

Henry walked into the living room and saw Alice looking a little more frightened than normal.

"Hey, Alice," he approached her. She glanced up at him, her eyes tear stained. "Are you okay?"

Alice nodded. She wasn't allowed not to be. Was she?

"Okaaaaay," Henry didn't believe her but they couldn't push her too far, all that would do was make her even less likely to do things. And it looked to him like she'd decided to come out of her room on her own for once.

"Good job coming out of your room, by the way."

Alice nodded. She wanted to go back into it. Alice reached over and grabbed one of the blankets she could reach without moving. It was soft and it was warm and it was comforting. When she could reach the blankets she'd throw one over herself and hold onto it. Everything here was still so new and still so frightening.

Robin soon joined them and sat across from Alice.

"You came out of your room?" Robin asked, she was proud of her. Alice only came out of the room when Zelena told her to do something else. It was less than a foot away but it was a start. "Good job."

Alice nodded. Maybe this is what Zelena wanted? It didn't make sense. She hadn't told her where to go or what to do. She just told her not to be in her room. She wanted to be in her room, though. She knew better than to argue with a direct order and so sat clutching a blanket hoping Zelena would be back soon enough with better instructions. Was she doing it wrong? She wanted Zelena to come back and tell her what to do but she was also frightened that she'd done it wrong already.

Robin noticed Alice seemed more frightened than usual by the situation.

"What's wrong?"

Alice shook her head. Nothing was wrong. She just wanted to go back into her room. She felt safter there. And she wasn't allowed to say anything.

"It's just me and Henry, we won't be upset if you talk." Alice nodded. She could speak to Robin easier. She didn't look at Henry. She pretended he wasn't there.

"don'tknow," The two words blended together but Robin thought for a moment.

"You don't know what's wrong, is that it?" Robin took a guess. Alice shook her head.

"You don't know what to do?" Robin guessed again. Alice nodded.

"Whatever you want to."

Alice shook her head. She couldn't go against the order Zelena had given her. She'd told her to stay out of her room.

"I promise you, you won't be in trouble. Just do whatver you want to do," Robin was begging Alice. Alice was so scared right now and she was shaking as she clutched the blanket she must have dragged out of the corner with her. "It's okay. What do you want to do?" She could tell Robin what she wanted, that was okay. She was safe to talk to even if she couldn't help her get what she wanted. She glanced at Henry for a minute, she didn't know him well enough yet.

"I'll look away," Henry told her and turned around. He didn't have to see her ask for whatever it was she wanted. Henry knew she wasn't as comfortable around him as she was with Robin.

Alice pointed into the corner.

"You want to go to your room?" Alice nodded. "Go ahead, my mom won't mind."

Alice shook her head violentally. That was the one thing Zelena had told her not to do. That part of the order had been clear.

"Okay, you don't have to. Do you want me to hand you anything you can't reach?" They had quickly learned that Alice didn't mind as much if someone else helped her to get things she couldn't get to. She preferred when Robin did it, she scared her the least. Alice shook her head, she had what she wanted. "Want to play a game?"

Alice nodded. That she could do.

"Okay, want to come with me to get the cards?" Robin knew Alice would probably say no but it didn't hurt to offer so she knew she could come if she wanted to. Alice shook her head. Robin couldn't tell her it was okay to move. "I'll be right back."

Robin returned with a deck of cards and dealt all three of them the cards they needed for the game. The game calmed Alice down and forced her to loosen her grip on the blanket at one point.

Zelena came in as they were still playing. Alice dropped the cards. She knew Zelena was okay with them playing but wasn't sure if she'd done what she was supposed to.

"Hey, that looks fun," Zelena told her. "What'd you do today?"

Alice blinked. Direct question. "Game." Her response came out as a whisper. She knew how to make full sentences but her mother only ever wanted her to answer her questions. The less she spoke, the better.

"You played a game? That's awesome. Good." Zelena had been gone few hours so suggested Alice go to the bathroom. Once Alice was out of the room Robin jumped up from the ground and looked at her mom.

"What exactly did you tell Alice to do while you were gone?"

"To do anything besides sit in her room. Why?"

Robin groaned. No wonder Alice had been so scared most of the day. She couldn't hide and she didn't know what Zelena had wanted her to do. "It didn't go well. She wouldn't move from just outside of it and when she wanted to you'd told her not to so she just sat next to her room all day."

Zelena felt bad, she'd only been trying to help Alice and she may have made it worse. Zelena went to get Alice.

"Hey, you can come out now, let's go back to the living room."

Alice followed Zelena back into the living room, hanging slightly back since she didn't want to get too close to her.

Alice sat down in the floor, grabbing a hold of the blanket again. She found it comforting and she was scared she'd angered Zelena, even though Zelena didn't seem to react the same way mother did to her mistakes.

Zelena thought about it, Alice had done exactly what she'd asked her, but it's not what she had meant for her to do. How could she communicate what she wanted without making Alice think she'd done something wrong? She wanted to hunt down the girl's so called mother and find out every last detail of what she'd done but she had a feeling she'd return to her murderous ways if she ever met the woman.

Zelena sat down in front of Alice. Alice flinched as she did. She'd been getting more used to Zelena but she still scared her when she got close.

"Good job coming out of your room, but you can go in there when you want to."

Alice made a beeline for the corner and curled into herself. Zelena sighed she hadn't meant for Alice to do it _right then_. She couldn't scold her for it. To Alice, this must have sounded like an order. She wasn't going to force her out of the space she found comfortable. But she was curious what she did all of the time when she sat by herself.

Zelena approached the corner. If she phrased it right, Alice might just talk to her. And if she had Robin sit with her she'd likely talk a bit more.

"Hey," Alice glanced at her and nodded. She acknowledged Zelena was there. "Can we talk?"

Alice nodded. She didn't know why. She'd done what she was told to, hadn't she? Zelena noticed the worry apparant on her face.

"You're not in trouble. You did good, good coming out of your room on your own. That's great, really good." Alice nodded. She just wanted to be left alone. Or play a game with Robin. She'd did what Zelena asked, hadn't she? Mother left her alone mostly when she did that.

Zelena wanted to help Alice. How did she keep from getting bored all day?

"What'd you think about all day?" Zelena asked. Alice blinked. No one had ever asked her what she was _thinking._ She thought about a lot of things. She didn't have anything else to do. And she was so lonely. She thought about how to get mother to just not be so angry at her all the time, she hadn't been very good at that . And now she thought about how to make sure she didn't anger Zelena, she wasn't very good at that either. But when she wasn't worrying she'd entertain herself with thoughts of what it'd be like to go outside, what different objects would look like or feel like or smell like if they were different. What it'd be like to be able to run around outside and be as loud as she wanted, or as quiet as she wanted. At this point, she'd rather be quiet. It never helped anything when she wasn't. Sometimes she'd think about how nice it'd be to just make herself small enough that she could hide in one of the teacups mother had her clean. Sometimes she wanted to shrink down so mother couldn't see her. It'd make things so much easier, wouldn't it? And sometimes she thought about what it'd feel like to not be so scared to move. She knew how. She'd done it before. But she was always frightened she'd get caught and so it was rare she did it. She'd stopped trying after she met Robin, her catching her reminded her that mother could easily come back from the market earlier than she said she would. She thought about the market mother mentioned a lot. She never explained it but she always told Alice there were a lot of people around. She tried to imagine that but didn't have enough experience with the wordl outside of the tower. "It must get really boring not having anything to do."

Alice shook her head. She could entertain herself well enough and she could sleep whenever her thoughts weren't enough to keep her engaged. Zelena asked the question again.

Alice blinked, she'd gotten lost in her train of thought. She thought about a lot of things. She didn't know how to explain most of them. She knew she thought about the outside. But would that make Zelena angry? She decided it was fine to lie.

"Nothing." Zelena held in a groan. Someone that only moved when told tou had to have a better imagination thean that.

"I'm sure you think of something, please tell me?"

Alice stared at her. She wasn't getting out of this was she? Fine. She'd tell her. Maybe then she could just be left alone for a little while?

"Outside," Alice whispered.

"You think about the outside?" Alice nodded. "What about it?"

Alice didn't know the words for most of the things outside of the tower. Mother had hated when she asked questions and she only needed to know about things inside the tower. But she remebered learning her colors and shapes as a child because it made it easier for mother to tell her what to do.

"Thegreenthingsoft," she ran her words together so she could stop speaking sooner. Zelena only heard part of it the words blurred together so much. Robin had spent enough time around Alice to understand her and be able to wager a guess.

"The green thing?" Robin asked. Alice nodded. "It's soft?" Alice nodded again. Grass! She was talking about the grass. Zelena thought a moment. Alice didn't know what grass was. She hadn't been allowed to ask any questions.

"It's called grass," she told her. Alice's eyes widened, this time in suprise instead of their usua fear. She'd wanted to know what it was since she was little but mother had always told her she wasn't supposed to ask questions then sent her away from her. Alice had stopped asking by the time she was five.

Zelena had a better idea now. One that would hopefully both encourage Alice to move around and start to give her words for the things she didn't understand. She just had to find a way to convince her it was a good idea.


	5. The Outside

Zelena knew it wouldn't take much to convince Alice to go outside with her. She'd do whatever she was told to do. Zelena wished she could get her to just do any small thing on her own. Aside from cleaning she wouldn't. But so far, none of her attempts had worked. In fact, they'd backfired and caused more harm than help. She'd finally found a small sliver of what Alice thought about. She was hoping she could use it to encourage her to do anything besides hide and clean. She knew she hadn't had much, or really any, acsess to the world around her tower. And it sounded as if she didn't have any knowledge of it either. So if she could just get her to go outside she'd be able to expereince some of the world around her.

"Let's go outside," Zelena offered. Alice blinked. Outside? She'd done that once and that was just to come here. She'd always wanted to go outside but the barrier had always stopped her. Not that it needed to be there, mother could have simply told her no and she wouldn't have strayed too far away. Up until she met Robin, that is. And she'd never actually had permission to do it. Was Zelena allowing her to? Why? Alice was confused about almost everything here. And the longer she stayed the less things made sense. Back in the tower, she knew what mother expected of her-most of the time-but here she couldn't figure it out. Back in the tower she knew what the consequences for breaking a rule might be and here she had no idea. Alice stood up and followed Zelena and Robin outside.

She stared at the world around her. She hadn't had a chance to take it in the last time as she'd been so distracted by how many rules she was breaking and how angry mother would be if she knew. This time she could take it in. She didn't know what most of it was called but she liked it so far. There was something yellow that seemed to float like a dish in water on top of something blue and the yellow thing seemed almost hot but not quite. The ground had a path made of the same things her tower was but instead of grey they were brown. There were white things that looked like bunches of little circles connected togehter against the blue. And the green, no it was grass she knew that one now, had lots of colors poking out of it. Alice stared at it, darting her eyes around both in awe and fear.

"You can go look at it," Zelena encouraged. She wished she'd do it on her own. Alice nodded and went and sat down on the grass. She touched one of the colroful things poking out of the grass. She liked the way it looked. And the grass was really soft.

Alice wanted to know what the colorful things were. She liked how they looked. And they felt so different from anything else she'd ever touched. And they seemed to have a smell. But would Zelena mind if she asked? She glanced over at her. She wasn't even really watching. And she was outside so maybe the rules were a little different?

Robin came and sat beside her.

Was it okay to ask the question she had? Robin answered the unspoken question before Alice could decide against asking it.

"It's called a flower, they come in lots of colors, and they just kinda grow in all kinds of places. What else do you want to know?"

Alice wanted to know more about what she could suddenly see and feel and hear more clearly than she had in her entire life. She was outside now and the only rule mother had about the outside was to not go there so did it really matter if she broke another rule? Was it okay if she just asked a question she had? She made her choice. She was already outside, what was one more wrong? In the end her curiosity won out over her fear.

Alice glanced around and pointed at the yellow thing that seemed to be spreading heat over her entire body. She wanted to know about the world. Her excited curiosity combined with the new scenery caused Alice to briefly forget her fears. And it helped that Alice's back was turned to Zelena so she didn't feel like she was speaking to her .

"What is it?" Alice knew how to speak she just tended to try not to. But everything about the situation was different and Zelena wasn't really watching so she decided to take the smallest of risk.

Robin held in a gasp. That was the first time she'd heard Alice speak an entire sentence. She usually only got one or two words out and they were always rushed together. This one wasn't three whole words and they weren't blurred sentence was spoken in Alice's usual hoarse whisper but it was still spoken. This had to be handled extremly carefully. "The sun."

Alice wasn't used to her questions being answered. This was a first. She pointed to the tall brown things with green on top. "What is it?" and Robin happily answered this question to.

"It's a tree." And the more questions Robin answers the more excited Alice got. She stayed seated on the grass but soon learned what the words for everything in her field of vision. The blue thing was the sky. The yellow thing was the sun. The green stuff was grass. The ground had dirt on it. The white things were clouds. The colorful things poking out of the grass were flowers. The colorful things that _moved_ were bugs. Alice only actually spoke her question out loud two or three times but it was still a step above her complete silence or one worded answers.

Robin encouraged Alice more every time she asked the question both by answering it and telling her it was good she was talking. They sat on the grass while Robin talked and Alice darted her eyes around enjoying her first real experience being outside. A small brown thing approached them.

"What is that?" Alice asked pointing to a small brown thing that had come close to them. It looked like it was soft like one of her blankets.

"It's a squirell," Robin told her. She was going to tell her she shouldn't touch it but Alice's hand was already outstretched before she could. Alice touched the squirell, she was gentle. And much to Robin's shock the squirell simply climbed into Alice's lap. It wasn't going to run?

Alice gave the small creature gentle pets and whispered to it. "Hi." Robin had only heard her greet anyone a handful of times and it took her over a month of knowing her before she would.

Robin got up and walked away. She could barely hear her but she could tell Alice was talking to the squirell.

"We're keeping the squirell," Robin told Zelena.

"Robin, we can't just keep a wild animal."

Robin nodded. "No but we can encourage him to keepp visiting by setting up feeders," Zelena shook her head in amusment. That they could do.

" ."

The squirell chattered but Alice couldn't understand him. She wondered if he could understand her. She hadn't spoken this much since she was a young child. Something about the squirell was comforting. She hoped she'd get to visit him again. "Idon'tknowwattheywantmetodo."

Her words blurred together, she was still afraid to speak long sentences without trying to jump to the end by forgetting to add some space between her words. "thankyou." She thanked the squirell for listening. She'd never felt like anyone listened as much as he was. Not that she'd given anyone else a chance to. The squirell chattered again and the scampered away.

Robin sat down next to her. "See you made a friend there." Alice nodded, even though she didn't fully understand Robin's words. What was a friend? Were she and Robin friend's? She held in a sigh. She hoped she'd see the squirell again.

Zelena offered the idea that they go inside to eat and Alice did as she was told. She liked going outside but she wouldn't ask for it. Unless that was okay? Zelena had to have heard her speaking to the squierell and she hadn't gotten in trouble for it. She thought about it. She'd try it some time. But not right now. She was tired now.

They finished the rest of their day and Alice curled up in her room, thinking about the events of the day and wondering how angry Zelena would be if she just asked to do something she wanted to do.


	6. Where?

Robin finished hanging up the squirell feeder. The small fuzzy animal had gotten Alice to open up so much and Robin wanted to attract the creature back so Alice had someone she felt she could talk to. She walked inside and noticed Alice sitting in the floor in the corner of the kitchen, watching as Zelena walked around making breakfast and clutching a blanket as usual. They'd figured out which places she liked to be the most and made more make-shift forts for her in the kitchen corner and in the bathroom.

Zelena walked around more and then dropped a spoon, it landed at the edge of Alice's blanket. Alice glanced at it. Would Zelena want her to hand it to her or just leave it where it was? It was close enough to her, wasn't it? Alice reached to grab it just as Zelena was bending over to do the same. They bumped into each other. Alice's eyes went wide as she dropped the spoon and clutched her blanket tighter. She wasn't supposed to get close to her. Alice's eyes remained wide as she tried to decide what to do. Zelena was really close and mother always told her to stay away from her unless she was in trouble. And she had _touched_ Zelena. She hadn't meant to but she couldn't explain that. She just wanted to curl up in the safety of the corner that was her room. But she couldn't do that so she sat frozen more than usual and then let her eyes dart from Zelena and back to other parts of the room quickly but never losing her focus on Zelena. She needed to apologize.

"Sorry," she whispered. Zelena looked at the fear apparent in Alice's eyes and stepped back. She wasn't helping the situation by staying so close.

"It's okay, thank-you." Alice nodded, still somewhat scared.

Henry walked into the room "Good morning, everyone!"

Alice flinched but otherwise ignored Henry's presence.

"Hey Alice, want to play a game?" Robin offered after it was clear Alice wasn't going to be comfortable watching Zelena cook at the moment. Alice was still a little shaky and kept glancing over in Zelena's direction more than she usually would.

Alice thought for a moment. She would if Robin would play where she already was. Alice nodded.

"Do you want to play somewhere else?"

Alice shook her head and pointed at the floor. She wasn't sure if it was okay to move right now and Robin came and sat down next to her and they played their game until breakfast was ready. Zelena knew Alice would do just as she told her to but wondered if she could get her to pick where she'd sit.

"Alice, where do you want to sit?"

Alice blinked. _Where did she want to sit?_ She wasn't sure what that meant. She knew what it meant but it didn't make sense being directed to her. Mother never asked her what she wanted or where she wanted to be. She just told her where she wanted her to be and Alice did as she asked. It was easier that way. Where did Zelena want her? She wasn't supposed to move anywhere without being told to. So how was she suppoosed to do this? Not move? Yeah? Alice darted her glance between Zelena and the floor. She decided it'd be best to stay where she was.

She pointed to the floor. "Here," she whispered assumping Zelena wanted an answer. Zelena held in a sigh. It wasn't quite what she'd hoped Alice would do. Would it hurt to push a little further?

"Are you sure?"

Alice stared at Zelena. She didn't know what she wanted. She was fine where she was but did Zelena not want her to stay put? She wanted her to just tell her what to do. She knew how to handle that. She didn't know how to handle this. Alice shook her head. She still didn't know what Zelena wanted. She darted her eyes around the room. Was it okay if she went back to her room? Of course not! But she wanted to. She wouldn't do it, though.

"Where do you want to sit to eat, Alice?" Alice stared at the floor for a moment and then let her eyes wander again as thoughts darted across her brain. She didn't know what to do. It was so much easier in the tower. Sure, she had been scared of mother but she was scared here too. She didn't know what Zelena wanted from her. She never did. She made it even less clear than mother had when she was angry, but Zelena didn't seem like she was angry at her. Alice held in the questions she had. It was different inside. If she was outside she'd feel like she could talk a bit more. And Zelena was asking her where she wanted to be. Was it okay? Alice took in a breath, if she asked would Zelena be upset? How would she react? She hadn't gotten upset with her yet, had she? Alice decided against it. She couldn't do it. She wanted to go outside but wouldn't ask to do it. That could only end poorly for her. She'd wait until Zelena told her to go out there again. She hoped it was soon. The rules were different there. And she felt like it was okay to talk more. At least to the little brown fluffy thing that she'd met, Robin had called it a squierell. Alice pointed to the ground again and gave a quiet answer to the question. "here."

Zelena didn't believe that Alice wanted to stay where she was . But it was clear she wouldn't move without some kind of structure. What if she had choices? She'd like it outside hadn't she?

"Do you want to go outside or sit at the table?"

Alice didn't know what to do. It was a direct question but she wasn't supposed to say what she wanted. She'd liked it outside but what did Zelena want her to do? Alice liked it better outside. The rules were different, she could talk a bit more. But what was the rule about asking to go? She wanted to. How did that work? She didn't know what to do. What was the worst that could happen? A voice in the back of her mind reminded her that Zelena could hurt her if she wanted to, just like mother had. But another part of her told her Zelena hadn't tried to. Yet? She decided the risk was okay but was still frighgtened. She took in a breath and muttered as quickly and quietly as she could manage. Asking for things while inside wasn't okay "Outside."

Zelena saw Alice's mouth move but didn't hear a sound. "I didn't hear you, can you say it again?"

Alice was scared now. Was Zelena angry at her answer? She couldn't change it now. She sucked in another breath and brought the volume of her whisper up slightly. "Outside."

Zelena wanted to let out a cheer. Alice wanted something and was asking for it. Sure she had to be given a bit of encouragement and it'd taken giving her choices and it was nearly inaudible at first but it still worked.

"You want to go outside?" Alice nodded. Yes. She did. "Okay, let's go outside."

Alice nodded and stood up, dropping her blanket. She wanted to bring it but didn't know if she was allowed to. Zelena noticed she'd dropped the blanket she usually had clutched in her hands. Did she need to tell her to bring it with her?

"You can bring your blanket, if you want to." Zelena considered getting her a smaller one that would be easier to carry around with her. She'd do that later. Something about them seemed to comfort Alice and she needed any comfort she could get. It had to be scary for Alice staying somewhere with people that were nothing like her so-called mother. Zelena was angry at the woman. No one should feel the need to behave the way Alice did. She was scared of nearly everything. Scared of speaking or moving or honestly even living in the same space as Zelena. She was okay around Robin and henry but still easily frightened.

Alice picked it up and followed Zelena outside, keeping her distance but watching her every move. She ate her food and then stared at Zelena waiting to see what she wanted her to do.

"Are you done eating?" Zelena asked once she noticed Alice staring at her. Alice nodded. Maybe she'd go explore?

"Okay, go explore, I guess." Alice didn't know what explore was. She wasn't inside where the rules were a bit stricter. Alice got a little more bold for once. Or at least felt more bold for a moment. "What'sexplore" Zelena blinked. Alice was asking her a question. She never did that. Zelena decided it was best to get Alice outside a bit more. It seemed to make her a lot braver.

"Good job, Alice." Alice blinked. Since when was asking a question a good thing? It was okay with Robin. But with Zelena? The outside really did have different rules, didn't it. "Oh and it means go look around." Zelena wanted to tell her to stay where she could see her but thought that might create a problem so she just decided to watch in case she tried to get too far.

Alice didn't really know where to go so went and sat down in the same place she had been the day before. She glanced around. Wait. She was outside the rules were different. She could move a little further. She stood up and took a few shaky steps forward. With every step she'd glance back at Zelena to make sure it was okay. She made it about two steps before sitting back down. It wasn't okay. She wasn't supposed to move unless told to. She was outside but the rules couldn't have been entirely different. She saw the squirell and thought it'd be nice if it said hi. The squirell came over and crawled into her lap, again. She could talk to him. He wouldn't tell. And her back was turned to Zelena. She was quiet enough. Zelena wouldn't know about the secret conversation she was having with the squirell.

" ?whatdotheywantmetodo?Idon'tlikeit. Idon'tknowwhatIwant." Alice raced through the words, still frighted about being caught speaking on her own. The squirell chattered back even though Alice didn't understand him. "Thank-you." Alice liked talking to the squirell. She could tell him how she felt without anything bad happening. She'd never had anyone like that before. The squierll ran off as Alice watched. He made her feel better even if she was still confused.

Zelena watched as Alice sat with the squirell in her lap. She was communicating with him much more than she would with anyone else. Sure it was one sided but it was better than the one worded answers she only gave if she absolutley had to. She wanted Alice to explore. She knew Alice seemed more comfortable outside. Could she get her to move out here further than the few steps she'd gone to sit? Once Zelena saw the squirell move she decided to try something. She hoped this didn't backfire like some of her other plans.

"Hey, Alice." Alice looked up and watched Zelena. Time to go back inside? "Do you want to go to the tree or go look at the bush?" Zelena pointed at what she was talking about.

Alice glanced at both things. The bush was closer. And it was close to the tower. Alice didn't know if that was the right word or not but didn't mind. She didn't want to talk but knew she had to. "bush."

Zelena nodded and gave her permission to go. Alice walked over to the bush. Where was Robin she had a question. Well a lot of questions. Could she eat the colorful things on this? What would they taste like? It was close enough she could touch it. Alice grabbed the thing in front of her and went to stick it in her mouth. It looked like food. And she was curious. And didn't know any better.

Zelena watched with horror as Alice grabbed a berry that wasn't safe to eat. She couldn't yell.

"No," Zelena hoped this didn't harm Alice's slowly growing and fragile confidence. But it would hurt her if she ate it.

Alice glanced up at Zelena. What was she doing wrong? She was just trying to eat something that looked like she could eat it. She tried to put it back on the bush but settled for gently setting it on one of the parts of the bush. "Good. Thank-you." Zelena knew Alice needed to be encouraged and told she'd done something right or she'd be scared to do anything again. "It's poisonous. Don't eat it, please."

Alice nodded. She knew what poisonous meant. Mother had made plenty of potions that were poisonous. She didn't like the way they smelled and mother had said they would taste bad. Not that she'd been talking to Alice but she could hear her talking to her plants or maybe herself.

"Thank-you, again. You can still go explore."

Alice was tired. She wanted to go in an go to bed. But she didn't have a choice. Robin came outside and saw Alice yawn.

"Alice, are you tired?" Robin asked her.

Alice nodded. It wasn't up to Robin to tell her when it was okay to go inside.

"Do you want to go inside?" Zelena asked. Alice nodded. "Okay, let's go inside." Alice followed Zelena inside and waiting for her to tell her where to go.

"You can go to the bathroom, if you need to," Zelena hated having to tell Alice it was okay to use the bathroom. But if she didn't there'd be a disaster if she ignored that need. "Just come into the kitchen when you're done."

Alice nodded and did as she was told. When she came back she stared at Zelena while she sat in her corner of the kitchen for a minute but then her tiredness caught up to her and she fell asleep.


	7. Game

Zelena had realized that Alice seemed to think the rules outside were less strict. She couldn't seem to find a way to get to what Alice's logic was enough to get her to do things inside on her own. And she only did it a little outside. They started to spend more time outside and Zelena just waited while Alice did what was close to exploring to her. She'd still have to be encouraged at first but after a bit when nothing bad had happened she seemed to open up even more and would walk short distances without waiting for Zelena to tell her she could. Often Robin was with her.

"Hey, Alice?" Zelena needed to go inside but she would let Alice stay out here if she wanted to . "I need to go inside. Do you want to come in or stay out here?" Zelena had stopped only asking if she wanted to do one thing. All that caused was her thinking she _had to_. Now she gave her a few choices so Alice had to make a decision. It was a learning curve for everyone. Sometimes Alice would give an answer quickly, sometimes she'd sit with her thoughts for a bit, and sometime she'd just freeze and stop doing anything. Everyone knew that it was hard for Alice to make decisions and so they waited until she gave an answer. Sometimes that pause felt like it went on for hours.

Alice blinked, staring up at Zelena. She was still adjusting to the new way Zelena spoke to her. She didn't make what she was supposed to do clear any more. But she hadn't gotten in trouble for any answer she'd given. She liked it better outside and Robin was out here so if she needed anything she could go get Zelena. "Outside." Alice pointed to the grass she was sitting on.

"Okay, I'll be inside." Alice nodded.

Once Zelena left Alice glanced over at Robin. She wanted to play a game. But she wasn't supposed to ask for things. She was outside, though. And the rules out here were _different._ And it was just Robin. Alice opened her mouth but before she could get a word in Robin had her own suggestion.

"Do you want to_" Robin cut herself off. "Wait were you going to say something?"

Alice shook her head. She'd do whatever Robin wanted to do as long as it didn't go against any of the rules she thought still applied outside. "It's okay, Alice. You're allowed to talk. What is it?"

Alice knew that Robin didn't mind when she spoke. She'd been the first person to ever tell her it was okay to say whatever she wanted to say. But she was still scared. She glanced around. Zelena was inside. She couldn't hear her. Not that had ever brought her a lot of comfort with mother but she could try. And if it failed she could handle it. She hoped.

"Game?" Alice forced out one word quietly. But Robin understood what she meant. Robin was in shock. Alice had never asked for anything. She just went with whatever she was told to do. She never activley sought out what she wanted or even needed. This was a huge step. And it had to be handled carefully. She needed to give Alice exactly what she wanted. And make her feel like asking for things wasn't scary but good.

"Yeah, I'll play a game with you. Let me go get the cards. And maybe Henry?"

Alice nodded. Had that actually worked? She'd never been able to get what she wanted just by asking. If she absolutely needed something she'd occasionally ask but mother would always yell about her bothering her. Or tell her to leave her alone after doing it. Or hurt her for so much as thinking it was okay to ask when mother was clearly busy. Alice was overwhelmed by the situation but really did just want to play a game.

Robin returned with the decks of cards in hand and Henry following behind her.

They both sat down near Alice and Robin tried to hand Alice the cards. "Do you want to shuffle or want me to do it?" Alice blinked. Another choice? This had quickly become exhausting to her. She wasn't used to making her own decisions and now she had to do it _all the time_. Alice didn't particularly care who shuffled the cards, she just wanted to play the game. It would be quicker if Robin did it, she guessed.

"You."

"Okay." Robin shuffed the deck then dealt them each a hand for the game. They played for a while. And in the middle of the game Henry decided to try and make conversation with Alice. He had no quite adjusted to her near silent passive take on the world.

"So, Alice, what's your favorite food?"

Alice looked at him. She didn't know what he was asking her. "What?" she considered that an answer to his direct question.

"He means what food do you like the best, Alice?"

Alice didn't know. She ate whatever was handed to her and just didn't care. Food was food. Eating was just another thing she had to do whether she wanted to or not. Just like everything else. This was starting to change but she still only made her own decisions if someone gave her clear choices.

She didn't know how to quickly say that so she went for something that barely made sense. "No."

Henry blinked. Did she just say no to that question? It didn't really make sense as an answer. Henry was going to ask her what she meant.

"I think that Alice means she doesn't have a favorite food, yeah?" Robin clarified.

Alice nodded. "Well, my favorite is choclate anything. With a little cinnamon."

Alice didn't have any idea what chocolate or cinnamon were but listened to Henry's description of foods he really liked anyway.

It was Alice's turn again. She didn't play this game in the way it would normally be played. It usually required a lot more speech. They had two decks and she kept one card of each number in front of her that she'd point to and she'd either point or look at the person she was asking or sometimes manage to choke out their name. They played a lot of rounds of card games until it started to get dark then they headed inside. Alice was starting to get frustrated with how Zelena had began asking her questions.


	8. Chapter 8

The new way of speaking to Alice had started to work. Instead of asking her if she wanted to do a specific thing, Zelena had started to give her two or three choices at a time. Alice didn't know how to react to this at first. She'd freeze and stare at Zelena, waiting for her to make her own decision on what she wanted Alice to do. Zelena would simply repeat the question until Alice told her her answer. Alice didn't like making choices. She didn't know how and she was always afraid she'd say the wrong thing. Or that her voice would be too loud. But Zelena wouldn't back down from this new way of interacting. As much as Alice wanted her to, Zelena didn't know how scary this was for her.

Zelena was ready to see if this new strategy worked with anything besides small decisions about where Alice wanted to sit.

"Alice," Alice glanced up from where she was sitting and waiting for Zelena to use more words. She was hoping she'd just tell her what to do. Making choices was _exhausting_. It wasn't something she was used to and it frightened her. "What do you want for dinner?"

Alice blinked. This was even harder than having a few choices. How was she supposed to answer this one? She'd defintley get the wrong one at leat with hving a few choices she could try to guess the right answer. So far, she hadn't been wrong once.

"Oh sorry, do you want me to make chicken or spaghetti?"

Alice didn't _care_ what Zelena made for dinner. It had always been so simple. Mother would make food and leave it out for her to eat. She never had a choice in what it was they ate. And she didn't care. She just wanted things to make sense again. She kept waiting for Zelena to get angry but so far the closest thing was her telling her no _once_. She didn't really understand that fully but it was different than the constant fear she'd had of mother. At least she knew how mother would react to things and could choose what to risk if she wanted to risk things. And she rarely did. Zelena was an unkown. She didn't know what would set her off or what answers she'd like to her questions that were so confusing she never knew what the best answers were.

Zelena waited for an answer. She would make litterally anything if it got Alice to make a decision. Alice seemed to like both of the foods she'd offered. Although she ate anything set in front of her without a complaint. At this point, Zelena would be ecstatic if Alice made a complaint about the food. A complaint would mean she felt a little safer here. Zelena worried that telling her "no" had caused a problem. She'd likely heard the word no prior to being hurt a lot in the past. Zelena wanted to know the details of Alice's childhood but couldn't stand to think about the amount of torture that it took to create the shell of a human currently clutching a blanket so tightly she thought it might actually vaporize just because of being asked what she wanted to eat.

"Alice, do you want chicken or spaghetti?"

Alice held in a sigh. She didn't care. Did Zelena really think she needed her oppinion? She was so tired of making choices. It was hard. It'd only been a day and she was getting tired of answering questions. Her voice rarely got this much use. She'd take spaghetti, she figured. It really didn't matter to her either way.

"Spaghetti."

Zelena smiled. "Okay, spaghetti it is." Did Alice want to help? Now that she could ask her things better it wouldn't hurt to see if she wanted to join her. It'd get her up and moving at the very least.

"Do you want to help me make it or play a game?" Alice wanted to scream. She never screamed but two questions in the course of a few minutes was too much. She needed to sleep. But between playing and helping she was supposed to help. She made this choice quickly. Besides, if she helped Zelena she could move around a bit. That was the corect answer wasn't it?

"Help."

Zelena wasn't sure why this answer came so quickly to her and now worried that it had been a mistake to ask that particular question but she'd let Alice do whatever she said she wanted to do.

"Ok, come on."

Alice stood up from the safety of the corner after folding the blanket she'd been clutching and pushing it further into the corner.

Alice thought that helping Zelena would mean doing everything while she barked orders at her, that's how she helped mother with things but Zelena just meant that she'd stir a few things and try to get Alice to talk. Alice stood as far away from Zelena as she could while still staying close enough to help.

They finished making the spaghetti and Zelena set the table. Zelena thanked Alice and hoped she'd decide on her own where to go. That didn't happen. Alice stood in the same place Zelena left her for a minute before sitting down and pulling her legs up to her chest while pressing her back against the cabinet. Alice wanted her blanket but she couldn't reach it from here. She tried to stretch for it but that didn't work. She decided to settle for the next closest thing and grabbed a handful of her skirt. It wasn't anywhere near as soft as her blanket but it was close enough when it came to the secuirty holding something gave her. The softness of the blankets made her feel more comfortable and it was the only thing that felt familar in this place where the rules seemed to be changing right around her. She didn't know how many of the rules she knew applied and was scared to ask. She assumed all of them except the ones she'd been forced to ignore. She was making choices now and going outside. Mother would be so angry but Alice didn't think she could get back to the tower if she tried. _Mother wouldn't take you back if you begged, she didn't want you she just needed you for her freedom. Remember? _ Alice's thoughts hurt her but she couldn't cry where she was. She burried her face in her knees and let a few silent tears fall. She missed home. She'd been scared there but she missed it. It made sense. She knew a decent amount about what would anger mother. She wasn't sure what she needed to do to anger Zelena. And she was so scared of doing it she almost preffered mother. But if she went back she'd be in more trouble for running away than anything else she'd ever done. And that was saying a lot considereing mother hated nearly everything she did. Could Zelena just get on with it? She needed to know what it would take to anger her. Would Zelena just get upset already? Alice could take the pain but she couldn't take the waiting any longer. That was so much worse. She'd never had to wait long for mother to get angry or yell or hurt her. And she certainly never apologzied to Alice for _anything._ The closest thing to an apology she'd ever gotten had been when mother had stayed gone longer than usual and then fallen asleep after giving her a list of things to do by the next morning. Alice had succeded at it but mother didn't care about that part. Just the part where she'd woken her up. Alice held in another sigh. Why did she want to go back to that so badly? She wasn't sure but she missed home and she missed mother evven if she'd hurt her.

They ate dinner and Zelena told Alice she could go to the bathroom. Robin came and found her. Alice was letting more tears fall. She just wanted to know what she was supposed to do her. In the tower she'd had a routine. It worked. She was miserable but she knew what to do, nearly all the time. Here? She didn't.

"What's wrong?" Robin asked her. How could Alice explain that she wanted to go home? Robin didn't seem to agree with anything mother had done but she just wanted to go home.

"Everything." Alice told her. Robin sighed. Alice was still adjusting and it was taking her time to figure things out.

"Okay, what's everything here?"

Alice didn't want to talk this much. At least not to Robin. Alice shook her head.

"I have an idea," Robin started off. "How about we go outside, you tell mr. squirell what's wrong and I do something else while you do?"

Alice shook her head. She couldn't do what Robin told her. "Alright, do you want to tell me?" Alice shook her head. "Ok."

Robin left the room and returned with a beat up rabbit toy. "How about you tell Mr. Rabbit. He can't talk."

If Alice knew what laughing was she'd surely have let out at least a chuckle. But as it was, Alice had no idea what a laugh was and so darted her gaze between Robin and the rabbit. Robin handed Alice the rabbit.

"I'll give you two some privacy." Robin walked out of the bathroom and got just far enough away that she could still hear bits of Alice's one sided conversation. She heard Alice say that she wanted to go home. Robin's heart broke for her. Alice still thought that prison a home. After everything, she thought the tower was more a home than a place filled with love and kindness. She'd never experienced those things before meeting Robin and they confused her, didn't they?

Robin came back into the bathroom and wanted to hug Alice. But she knew she flinched away from any physical contact. Robin sat next to her and gently placed a hand on her back. Alice wasn't as close to the wall as usual. Alice flinched but didn't pull away. Robin rubbed Alice's back gently and started talking to her. Robin knew Alice had never felt a kind touch in her life. And she needed this.

"it's okay, Alice. C'mon. Let it out. Cry if you want. Scream if you need to. I know. I know it hurts. I know you're scared. But going back there? It won't help anything."

Alice nodded, still letting silent tears fall. Alice hadn't gotten in trouble for asking Robin a question ever so she decided to risk it.

"Whatmakesyourmotheraangry?" she rushed the words but Robin seemed to get it.

"You don't have to worry, you won't anger her."

Alice glanced at Robin. Robin watched her face and saw the pleading look in her eyes. "She doesn't like when people get hurt. You wouldn't hurt anyone." Robin knew she couldn't know exactly what Alice would do if she actually did things on her own but she seemed so kind. That could have simply been from how her so-called mother had treated her but Robin thought she was truly kind. She didn't seem to hate the woman that had done gods knew what to her. "She will never hit you." Robin added after thinking for a moment about how often Alice flinched away from everyone.

Alice nodded. She didn't believe Robin and she had no new answers. It was just as frustrating as it was before the conversation. But at least she'd managed to tell someone how she felt. She wanted to go to sleep but was still waiting for Zelena to tell her she could go to her room.

"Why are you in the bathroom, anyway?"

"Waiting."

Robin hopped up from the ground and went to get Zelena who asked Alice if she wanted to sleep in her bedroom or in the fort in the kitchen. Alice chose her bedroom and curled up. Robin had told her she could keep the stuffed rabbit and Alice slept clutching that instead of a blanket.


	9. Regina

"Please?" Regina didn't know how to handle this. She'd been gone a while for the rebellion and finally gotten back to Zelena's house. Her son, Henry, spent a lot of time here and Regina came to visit as well but she'd been really busy helping Tiana with the rebellion. But now she had a bit more time on her hands and had come to visit her family. And now their faily included a girl who seemed to be about the same age as Robin but they couldn't be sure on that. They'd found her, or rather Robin had found her, locked away in a tower living with her mother who had treated her worse than they could even begin to imagine. She was fearful of most things. She pretty much only did as she was told. There was one exception, she Unfortunatley, she also only thought Zelena was much of an authroity figure. Which is exactly what had brought them to their current situation. Regina crouching uncomfortably in front of a wide eyed teenager clutching a toy rabbit while shaking over her presence.

Alice shook her head. She couldn't listen to her. It didn't matter if she was hungry or not. She would stay right here where Zelena had left her until told otherwise. "Alice, you have to eat. Zelena won't be back for a while." Regina was growing frustrated but not showing it. How did Zelena handle this every day? Regina knew Alice listened to her but this couldn't be easy, constantly having to make sure someone that wouldn't voice their needs was getting everything they needed. It had been hard with a young child but someone you could easily forget needed to be told what to do? Regina took back anything she ever said about Zelena's nature. She may have made her mistakes but this took the patience of a saint. And Zelena was doing it every day. She'd applaud her right now if she wasn't sure the sudden movement would have Alice pulling even further away from her.

"Ok, fine," Regina resigned. She'd tried pleading for at least half an hour already. No, she had to eat. It wasn't right to make her wait for Zelena who had left her in charge while she was gone. Why had she left her in charge? She longed for the days her own son was small, it was stressful at time but it was better than this. This was infuriating. Sure, Henry had had his fair share of tantrums but he'd never glued himself to a corner like this! "Alice, you _have_ to eat." Regina was growing more frustrated and Alice was growing more scared and confused.

Alice stared at her, she shook a little and pulled her knees to her chest a bit tighter. She agreed with what she was saying but she couldn't tell her what to do any more than Robin could. And what if she was wrong? Wouldn't Zelena be angry if she did what someone else told her? She wasn't really sure how this would've worked with mother. She'd never met another person until Robin. But mother had always said that she could only move when mother told her to. And Zelena was Robin's mother, sure she was a lot nicer but she was in charge of Alice. At least that's what made sense to Alice and nothing else in this strange place did so she was holding onto what she did understand. And Regina didn't live here so she couldn't tell her. Alice squeezed the toy rabbit tighter as her breathing started to speed up. She knew how to calm herself down. She'd had to do it a lot. In. Out. In. Out. And then she was as calm as it was possible for her to be. But she was scared. She was always scared. And she didn't know how to respond to Regina telling her what to do.

"Alice, what do I have to do to get you to eat?" Regina had admitted defeat. She'd do it however Alice wanted at this point. If she'd even tell her. Alice shook her head. She was sitting right here until Zelena got home. She hoped it be soon. She really did want to go play a game with Robin or maybe go to the bathroom. She'd managed to ask Robin for one of those things but that was outside and that was different and it was just Robin. Robin wasn't scary. Not really that scary, anyway.

Robin walked into the living room and saw the exasperated look on Regina's face.

"Hey, Alice," Robin greeted. "Can I join you in there?" Alice nodded. Regina took this as a cue to leave.

Robin could tell Alice was scared by something. "Alright, what's wrong?"

Alice stared at her. Regina had just spent a while trying to force Alice into breaking the most important rule of all.

"Eat." Alice choked out the one word. She was too scared right now to do much more than that. Luckily, Robin had learned how to put the pieces together and guess what Alice needed.

"Are you hungry?" Well, yes but that's not what she was trying to tell Robin. This was frustrating. She knew how to talk. But she hated it. She was scared of her own voice and it sounded wrong. The words hurt as they came out of her underused throat that was constantly rubbed raw from crying. And she never knew how mother would react to her talking. Sometimes she'd be angry she was talking at all sometimes she'd be angry about the way she spoke. She said she was too timid or her voice was too quiet. But what had she expected? She'd made Alice scared to speak by telling her not to speak unless mother was asking her a question. Sometimes that rule wasn't as enforced but it still lingered in the back of Alice's mind. Even when she was talking to Robin who she trusted more than anyone. Robin _wouldn't_ hurt her. Alice was mostly sure of that fact but she still flinched away from her as she shook her head.

"Okay, are you sure you aren't hungry? You didn't eat lunch either. Are you hungry?" Alice wasn't sure how to respond to the questions. Was she sure? Or was she hungry? Which question did she answer? Alice stared at Robin with confusion. She had no idea what she wanted her to say or anything.

"Are you hungry, Alice?" Alice nodded. She was. But she wouldn't go into the kitchen.

"Okay, do you want to go into the kitchen and eat?" Alice shook her head violentally. Robin knew this reaction meant she was terrafied of breaking whatever rule she thought existed. "Ok, ok. I understand. I'll bring your food here. And if you want, you can tell me what's wrong. Is that okay with you?"

Alice nodded. Maybe she could explain to Robin why she was scared but she didn't think she could.

Robin walked into the kitchen a threw a sandwhich together. "I'm going to take this to Alice," she told her.

Regina stared at her with shock. It can't have been that simple. "How'd you convince her to eat?"

"Did she tell you she didn't want to eat?" Robin asked.

"She didn't say much of anything. Just shook her head a lot."

Robin mimicked the way Alice usually shook her head in response to questions that didn't scare her. "Was it like that? Or more like this?" Robin then mimiced the violent head shake Alice reserved for when anyone besides Zelena told her it was okay to move.

"That one."

"What'd you ask her?"

"Just if she wanted to come eat in here."

"Oh, yeah. She only comes in here when my mom tells her she can. She's scared still, I think." Regina had known this but hadn't thought about the best approach to the situation. Any ill will she could have possibly still posessed for her sister melted away. She might have been disorganized and a horrible driver but she was handling this situation better than Regina thought she ever could have. "I'm going to go give Alice her sandwhich."

Robin walked off and set outside of the fort. She wouldn't go in there without asking Alice first. That was Alice's space to feel safe and Robin knew this.

"Here you go, one ham and cheese sandwhich." Robin did a mock bow which in her head was a funny stunt. In reality? It caused Alice to flich from the sudden movement and drop the toy rabbit she'd been holding.

"It's okay." Robin knew Alice didn't like dropping things. Especially if they made sounds. She reached over and handed the rabbit back to her.

"Thank-you," Alice whispered. She would talk some. "Aunt Regina didn't mean to scare you, she just didn't know what to do."

Alice nodded. She knew what that was like. She never felt like she knew what to do here. Alice ate her sanwhich and listened to Robin talk.

Zelena finally returned another hour later and made sure Alice had everything she needed. She wished Alice would just do things by herself. She longed for the typical teenage rebellion phase to sneak it's way out. At this point, it'd be a bloody good thing if Alice stole a care like Robin had.

**A/N: Stacey Dawe pointed out that Regina is rarely mentioned so this chapter kinda explains her and Alice's interactions with eah other a bit better. And I can go back to just forgetting her because I litterally don't have a damn clue how to write her character in this with what I've done with the other characters. She's around. Doing something. Proably. **


	10. The Door

Regina was spending a few days with her sister. Unfortunatley, Alice was scared of Regina more than anyone else now. It wasn't that she thought she could do anything. She didn't think she had any authority over her. But she'd spent a long time trying to force Alice into doing something she didn't think was okay to do. And she hadn't had any time to build any kind of trust with her like Robin had. And it was a different kind of fear than the one Alice had of Zelena. So yet again Alice was sitting and staring at Regina. She wanted to go back into her room. Or for this woman who scared her more than Zelena really did to just leave her alone. But that didn't work. And Alice knew she couldn't express her fear or dislike for her so she sat darting her glances back and forth from Regina to the food she currently didn't really feel like eating. She was exhausted. She'd spent most of the day before trying to explain to herself what was so scary about someone she didn't think would do anything. She hadn't when Alice had refused to do what she asked. Granted, that could have just been suprise at Alice trying to tell her no. She'd told her mother no _once_. She didn't intend to repeat that mistake. Alice shook the memory out of her brain with a shiver in her body.

"Alice, are you cold?" it was Robin. Alice trusted Robin. Alice shook her head. She was fine. Or as fine as she could be. She still did just want to go curl up in her room until Regina left. She didn't know how long that would be. "C'mon Alice, you need to eat."

Alice nodded. She did need to eat but she was too busy watching Regina. She seemed to get so angry yesterday. Alice didn't know it wasn't directed at her existence. All Alice knew was that she'd seemed angry and hadn't hurt her. That didn't make sense. So she was scared of her. Alice didn't want to deal with how she felt right now. She finished her food and then darted her eyes over to Zelena.

Zelena watched as Alice ate her food, a lot more slowly than she usuallly would. She watched as she stared at Regina. Damnit, she'd scared her more than they'd thought she had. Zelena regretted leaving Regina in charge. But, she was going to be gona long time and Alice wouldn't take care of herself. She hoped she'd have listened to Regina but it seemed she didn't. And now she was scared of her for some reason Zelena would likley never be able to understand. Zelena caught Alice's eyes which quickly tore away from her but she noticed the pleading look in them before they did. She didn't know what she wanted. She scanned through the most basic primal needs. She'd had food, she'd gone to the bathroom, she had water. And then she scanned through things Alice seemed to like or at least seemed to want to do, she liked card games, well that one was the only thing she'd ever asked for so it couldn't be that; she liked hiding in her forts;she seemed to like cleaning but she did that when no one was looking; and she liked going outside. Okay Zelena knew how to ask.

"Alice," Alice glanced over giving Zelena her nearly undivided attention. Alice kept letting her eyes wander back to Regina. "Do you want to go outside or do you want to go to your room?"

Alice wanted to go to her room. She hoped Regina would stay away from it but knew everyone here liked to approach it. Which was different from home. Mother never came near her corner. She knew mother hadn't wanted her but at least she gave her that one space to herself. Not that she was really protected there, all mother had to do was tell her to come out and she'd appear in front of her and do whatever she told her to. But it made her feel safer. Here she knew people would come over to her room and ask her questions or refuse to tell her what they wanted. It still felt safer to her than sitting in the open and there were a lot of soft blankets for her to use to comfort herself. And right now she wanted that comfort.

"Okay." Zelena didn't say anything else. Deep down she hoped Alice would just go but there was no such luck. Alice watched Zelena, waiting. "Okay, you can go to your room."

Regina watched as Alice walked by her and seemed to be holding in her own breath with how slowly she walked by. Alice really was scared of her. Regina waited for Alice to have fully retreated before turning to Zelena.

"Is it best if I go?"

Zelena shook her head. She wasn't sure. Alice was timid with everyone. She was a little more open around Robin but she still acted as if her mere presence was a reason for anyone that was close to her to hurt her. She'd watched as Alice shook in the kitchen corner over handing her something she'd dropped. She'd seen the fear in her eyes when Zelena told her no. She'd seen the way Alice seemed to try to watch everything at once. She'd seen how quickly Alice would become frightened and curl into herself as if trying to somehow make things better by taking up less space. She'd heard the tone Alice used when she did manage to speak that Zelena swore would rival the quietest of mice. If Zelena ever met Alice's so called mother she wouldn't mind picking the reasons she'd been called the wicked witch back up. And the father? Oh bloody hell she hoped for his sake he hadn't known Alice existed or Zelena would take him down too. But they were in a land with a much weaker legal system than the land without magic and while Zelena was grateful it was unlikely anyone would even know she had essentially kidnapped Alice, she wasn't happy she couldn't press charges against the woman that had done this to her.

"No. She is scared of _everything._ It's not just you. I dropped something maybe a week ago and she handed it to me and the apologized and shook for a while. She didn't calm down until Robin distracted her with a game."

"She likes games?"

"Yeah, she'll play cards with Robin. And with Henry when he's here. I, however, haven't tried to join in. Where is Henry, anyway?" Zelena thought she might offer to join the next time they were playing but wasn't sure how that would go over. At this point she'd try _anything _that might help.

"He's met a girl, seems kind of serious about her too.".

"Well, I'd love to meet her."

"You have, actually. Do you remeber Ella?"

Zelena thought a moment. Oh yes they'd met her during the rebellion. The girl Henry had met the day he'd been trying to return to Storybrooke. They continued their conversation about Ella and Henry's blooming relationship.

Alice hugged her toy rabbit while petting its fur. It was soft and it made her feel safer just like a blanket would. The toy rabbit gave her something to talk to that didn't scare her. The rabbit didn't respond and she was so quiet no one knew.

"Doyouthinkshe'sscary? ''tknowwhy." The rabbit didn't respond but Alice had an outlet for how she felt that didn't involve her having to wait until she went outside. Which she'd only do when it was offered to her.

"Hey, Alice?" Zelena approached the corner after Alice had been tucked away in it for hours. She hadn't forgotten about her, she'd checked on her several times and gave her choice of staying in or leaving the corner. "Do you want to come out of there or do you want to stay?"

Alice thought for a moment. She didn't know if Regina was still there or if she'd left but she did want to know. And she needed to use the bathroom. Not that badly, and she could hold it if she had to but she wanted to come out of the corner. And with the number of times Zelena had asked her she thought maybe she did too?

"Out," Alice's voice was a whisper as always but Zelena was relieved she was willing to come out of the corner. Alice walked out and then watched Zelena.

"You can go wherever you want to," Zelena told her, hoping that her voice didn't betray that she was pleading. She knew this would work as long as Zelena was around when she decided to move but was scared that Regina's presence might have caused a problem. Alice nodded. She needed to pee. She walked to the bathroom and noticed the door was closed. It was never closed when she needed it. And she didn't know how to use the door. She'd seen Zelena open the door that led to the outside. But she had no idea if this door worked the same way. She'd never seen a door before coming here. She stared at it. She grabbed the handle and shook it. That didn't work. She pulled it. That didn't work either. She tried to push it. Nothing. Robin walked out of a room and saw Alice struggling with a door that they normally kept open. They'd stopped shutting most of the doors in hopes that if she needed to get somewhere she'd not be deterred by a closed door, something the tower hadn't had. Clearly, they'd initially been wrong about how deep her fears ran.

"Do you need help, Alice? Do you want me to open the door for you?" Alice shook her head. She could do it if she tried hard enough. She wasn't supposed to have this much help. And they helped her with everything. She did everything in the tower. Mother never helped her! She made her food and told her when to do what but aside from that she hadn't done anything but hurt her. But here, nearly everything was being done for her. And no one had told her they didn't want her here. Mother had to keep her, they didn't. Alice didn't understand and she was getting more and more frustrated with the situation. Alice could feel another round of tears wanting to fight their way out. She'd never had to deal with a door on her own before and it shouldn't be this hard. But everything was hard! And she thought she could do this one thing. Zelena had told her to and now she couldn't and Alice didn't want to cry in front of Robin again. She'd seen her cry enough.

Robin wasn't sure what Alice wanted. She'd seen her trying to open the door and when she offered her help she didn't want it. What if she explained how?

"I can tell you how to do it, if you want?"

Alice held in a sigh. She thought she could do this without help but she couldn't. Alice nodded.

"Okay, grabbed this part," Robin pointed to the doorknob. Alice put her hand on the doorknob. "Now turn it that way." Robin pointed towards the right and Alice turned the handle. "Okay then just push the door."

The first try didn't work as Alice did each step seperatley. "Good try, Alice. Try again? Do it all at once."

Alice took a few tries but got the door open. Robin wanted to cheer but she held it in. "Good job, Alice." Robin left Alice to use the bathroom and walked into the kitchen where she saw Regina and Zelena engrossed in their own conversation.

"Hey," she greeted. "Who left the bathroom door shut?"

Regina admitted to it. "Why?"

"Alice was having a hard time getting it open. I don't think she's ever used a door but I showed her how."

"She's never what?" Regina was a little loud. She wasn't as used to Alice as Zelena and Robin were. Luckily, Alice was distracted and didn't hear her.

Alice finished using the bathroom and sat down close to the door. She was staring at the door. She could reach it from where she was. She wanted to try to shut it. The door hadn't made a sound when Robin showed her how to open it. So it'd be quiet. And she thought she'd be able to shut it if she tried. And she just she didn't want to have to wait for Robin to show her again. She already spent so much time waiting for someone's help when she couldn't reach things. Alice wanted to try. Was it okay?

"Isitokay?WhatifI'mwrong?" she whispered to the toy rabbit. It helped her work through her thoughts a little better than keeping everything in.

She decided it would be. She hoped. Alice reached her hand over to the base of the door and gently pushed it, she stopped when she couldn't push it any furhter without moving. She wasn't sure if she could reach the door knob. She pulled it back by the base of the door. And then pushed it back almost closed. Then she pulled it back. It wasn't the correct way but it was something to do while she waited on Zelena. And it was interesting. She'd never been around a door before coming here and she wasn't sure of the rules with it. But she wasn't moving from where she was sitting and it wasn't making a sound that could be heard from elsewhere. So she was sitting, mesmerized by the movement of the door. She tried pushing and pulling the door back and forth a few more times. Then she tried to push it further and it shut. Alice flinched as the door clicked into place. She reached over for the bottom of the door and tried to pull it back. It wouldn't move. How did it open? Alice tried to reach for the door handle but couldn't reach. She pulled her legs up to her chest and watched the door. As she was watching the door she clutched the toy rabbit and ran her hand alng the blanket she was sitting on.

Zelena walked over to the bathroom to check on Alice and noticed the door was shut. That was odd.

"She'sgoingtobeangry." Zelena heard her whisper through the door. She wanted to cry. There wasn't anything in the bathroom Alice used that she could have found that would have upset Zelena if she touched it. If she wanted to play with anything in there it was safe. And Zelena just wanted her to act like a kid. Even is she wasn't a young chind, she hadn't had a childhood at all.

"Hey, Alice?" Alice glanced at the door. Had Zelena heard the door shut? She'd be upset with her for making noise. She hadn't meant to. Alice shook. "Can I open the door?" Alice nodded but then thought about it. Zelena couldn't see her, could she? "Can you say it for me? Can I open the door or I can I not open the door?"

"Yes." Alice was quiet but Zelena went to open the door, gently as she didn't know where Alice was sitting. Zelena walked in. She saw Alice clutching her toy rabbit. Robin must have given it to her at some point, Zelena guessed. She'd seen Alice carrying it around but hadn't really thought about it.

Alice shook, she hadn't meant to make the noise. Did Zelena hear it?

Alice looked really scared. Zelena couldn't think of anything Alice had done or could even think she had done. The door was shut but that could have easily been something Robin did. But Robin wouldn't have.

"Did you shut the door?" Zelena asked her. Maybe she'd be able to explain she was allowed to mess with it if she wanted to. Alice blinked. She hadn't meant for Zelena to hear it. Zelena sat down in front of Alice. Zelena gently pushed the door shut then opened it again. "That is fun," Zelena told her. "Watch this." Zelena tried to reach for the door knob and pull the door open. "You can try if you want to?"

Alice stared at her. This was different. She thought Zelena would be mad but she wanted her to do the thing she thought would anger her. Was she going to hurt her if she did it? She wasn't going to go against what she told her to pull the door open from where she was sitting using the handle and it worked.

"Good job, Alice. You're allowed to do that whenever you want to."

Was there _nothing _that would anger Zelena. She wasn't trying to but she wanted to know what Zelena would do once she got angry. What did she want her to do? Alice didn't know. She watched Zelena.

"Do you want to go in the kitchen or go in the living room?" Zelena waited for Alice's answer. Alice didn't know what she wanted. But the kitchen had a corner and the living room didn't. But she didn't want to talk right now. She responded as quickly as she could.

"Kitchen," Alice sped through the word but got it out.

"Okay, you can go to the kitchen." Alice stood up and waited. She didn't want to stand close to Zelena. She flinched as she walked by her. She walked into the kitchen.

"Hi," Regina greeted when she saw her.

Alice flinched. She'd thought Regina had left already. She didn't know why she was so scared of her. It didn't make sense but she was.

"It's okay ," Robin comforted as she sat in front of Alice. She offerered the distraction that was her willingness to have a very one sided conversation. "Do you want to play a game?"

Alice agreed to play a game with Robin but darted her eyes toward Regina every time it wasn't her turn. Once Zelena came into the room Alice stopped playing. She couldn't keep her attention everywhere at once. She needed to watch both of them and also needed to pay attention to what Robin was saying to her and she just didn't know how to do everything.

"Do you have any 3s?" Alice shook her head. She didn't want to play any more but she couldn't tell Robin that. She'd have to talk in front of Zelena and Regina and she just didn't want to play right now.

"Okay, so I go fish," Robin pulled a card up. "Your turn Alice."

Alice shook her head again. She didn't want to drop the cards she was holding but didn't know how to explain to Robin she didn't want to do this. She was too frightened to play right now.

"Alice do you want to stop playing?" Alice nodded. Okay, good Robin understood what she meant. Could she please stay right there? She didn't want to be left alone with both of the people that scared her the most.

"I'm going to go put the cards away." Alice nodded. She didn't want Robin to leave but it was fine. Wasn't it? Alice clutched onto her toy rabbit and pulled a blanket closer to her. Zelena knew that meant Alice was terrafied but she wasn't sure of what.

Alice calmed down after Robin sat with her for a little while posing as a distraction. Zelena finished making dinner and asked Alice if she wanted to eat at the table or eat outside. Alice chose outside because Regina wasn't there. Alice talked to her squirell friend about why Regina was scary but he didn't provide her any more answers that her toy had. He did make her feel better, though.


	11. Chapter 11

Zelena needed to go to the market for a longer time today. She didn't want to leave Alice alone without any kind of supervision. She knew she'd sit in the same spot and not take care of herself. But at the same time she knew taking her with her was risky. Would she be able to handle the amount of people at the market? What if someone bumped into her and she panicked? What if she didn't know what to do? She'd tried having Regina watch her, she'd tried telling her to stay out of her room, she'd tried telling her to do whatever she wanted. All of it had backfired and made the problem worse. Zelena was tempted to go find the girl's so called mother and _make_ her tell Alice every rule she'd ever told her was wrong. Zelena hadn't found a way to tell Alice she was allowed to just be. She knew she was calmer outside. But she was still too scared and she worried the market wouldn't be a god enviorment for Alice right now. She saw Alice sitting and playing with Robin. The former holding a blanket and the latter holding up most of the conversation.

"Okay, I'm going to be gone a while. Alice," Alice paused what she was doing and looked at Zelena. "If you need to while I'm gone you can go to the bathroom and leave it, you can go to your room and leave it , you can go to the kitchen and get food and leave it, you can play with Robin and henry if he's around. Okay, bye."

Zelena hoped she'd listed everything. And Robin was there if she needed anything. Zelena hoped this would work. Alice _needed_ to do things. She'd move around outside but not much.

Alice didn't know what Zelena wanted her to do. She'd asked or told her a bunch of things right as she was walking out the door. She didn't need to use the bathroom but she'd go in there if she wanted her to. Alice glanced at Robin for a second. She'd know if she was doing it wrong. And she'd help, wouldn't she?

Alice got up and walked to the bathroom she didn't need to use. She sat down and played witht the door for a while. She liked doing that. She waited. Zelena had said she didn't have to stay in here but she was still a little confused.

Alice left the bathroom and went into her room. She stayed there for a few minutes then left it and walked into the kitchen. Alice didn't know how to cook but she knew how to grab the sandwhich Zelena had left in her corner for her. She sat down and ate. She finished eating and then went back to where she and Robin had been playing. In the amount of time Alice had taken to do this Robin had sat watching as Alice just followed what hadn't been instructions to a tee. She'd done every single thing on the list of what she could do. And then she sat down and went back to playing the game she had suddenly stopped playing an hour before.

"Okay then," Robin said. It was weird how much Alice cared about what Zelena wanted her to do. "I really think my mom meant you could do it if you wanted not that you had to. But, that works too." Alice blinked. Had she done it wrong?

"Sorry." Alice didn't have a better response.

"No, it's okay. You're allowed to do things. What do you want to do?" They had finished their game.

Alice wanted to go sit and play with the door. She liked how it moved. And it was quiet enough it didn't scare her. She wasn't sure if she was allowed to go do it. Would Robin know? She couldn't tell her what to do but she could help her decide if Zelena would be okay with it.

"Bathroom."

Robin blinked. Hadn't Alice just gone?

"I'm pretty sure you can do that." Alice shook her head.

"Yes. You can. Go ahead."

"Iwanttoplaywiththedoor," Alice rushed the words but was getting more confident around Robin at least. She'd realized Robin wouldn't hurt her and usually would help her and if she asked for things around Robin , she didn't get mad.

"Okay. Go ahead." Robin held in the laugh she had. It was something a bit weird but if Alice was having fun she wasn't going to stop her.

Alice went into the bathroom and played with the door. She remained mesmerized by it until Zelena got home. She wasn't going to move around in front of Zelena without her telling her to directly. So she waited still messing with the door when Zelena came and found her.

"How'd it go?" Zelena asked Robin as she walked in the door.

"She follwowd the list like it was a lot of orders But she did make her own decision to go play in the bathroom afterwards."

Zelena nodded. It was close enough for now. It was better than her sitting in one spot the entire time she was gone. That was the first decision Alice had made without any help. If Alice had a favorite food, Zelena didn't know what it was and so she'd make something she had heard her request when given a she actually liked it.

Zelena went into the bathroom to check on her and saw her playing with the door. This was now a frequent occurance and Zelena had started to wish Alice would sleep in a room that had a door so she could have something fun to do in her room but she didn't mind Alice finding something fun.

"Okay, you did good. Do you want spaghetti for dinner or something else?" Zelena left it a little less structured hoping she'd find out if there was anything else Alice liked but that didn't work.

"Spaghetti."

Alice had actually started to decide that was her favorite but never expressed this. Zelena told Alice when dinner would be ready and gave her a few choices of what to do. Alice chose to go play anoher card game with Robin in the kitchen and they sat and played until dinner was ready. The smallest step made Zelena swell with pride. Alice would be okay. It was just going to take some time.


	12. Movement

Zelena wasn't sure if she should be proud of Alice, sad for her, angry at the girl's so called mother or all three. Alice was sitting in the bathroom when Zelena had gone to tell her it was okay to leave. The door was moving back and forth. Alice was messing with the door. This was the first time Zelena had caught her doing it after telling her it was okay. Alice had been doing this every time she was in the bathroom. It was something that was fun. Or at least Alice's idea of fun. Zelena waited until the door was pulled open again and then stepped into the bathroom.

Alice glanced up at Zelena. And then continued with what felt like a game to her. She pushed the door shut and didn't manage to catch it. Alice flinched but wanted to keep playing. Zelena hadn't been angry the last time. Was it still okay?

Alice tried to reach the door knob and managed to open the door. She kept pushing it back and forth. Zelena didn't want to tell Alice she couldn't do something she seemed to enjoy but she couldn't sit in the bathroom all day. And Zelena knew that's what she would do.

Zelena didn't react to Alice playing with the door. Alice stared at her. She hadn't upset her?

"Hey, Alice?"

Alice had an idea. She was so tired of waiting for Zelena to get angry. She couldn't find a way to make her mad. Would Zelena get angry if she kept playing while she was trying to talk to her?

Alice pushed the door shut and made sure it made a sound. She glanced at Zelena who didn't react for a moment.

Zelena saw Alice shut the door. It was a weird thing to do but it wasn't a problem. And it did seem like Alice was getting a little more bold. Zelena would take it.

"Good." Zelena reopened the door. "Bit easier to shut it then open it, yeah?"

Alice stared at Zelena. How was that good? She'd ignored her when she was talking. She'd well Alice didn't know what exactly was wrong with what she did but she knew it should have been enough to make Zelena angry! Would she just get angry? Alice had spent her entire life trying to keep mother from being angry at her and it'd never worked. And she just wanted to know what would anger Zelena and nothing did. Alice wanted to cry but she had spent so long hiding her tears she couldn't bring herself to cry. Alice could make Zelena angry if she tried hard enough. She didn't know what would work. Alice glanced at the floor. What if she got up? What if she just started running around the house? Mother had never caught her doing that. Alice knew that would have gotten her in so much trouble. She wanted to make Zelena angry, didn't she? But how angry? Alice took in a breath and stood up.

Zelena blinked. This was new. She waited. She wanted to see where this was going. Where was this going?

Alice stood there for a few seconds. She had thought this through but not well enough. She knew her way around the house. But she'd have to run past Zelena. Okay maybe walking past Zelena was better. She wanted her angry but not _that _angry. Alice hadn't tried to run in a long time but she knew how. Not well but it'd work. She walked out of the bathroom and then ran down the hallway. Zelena could see her. Alice ran to the front door and stopped. The door. Should she go outside? No. This was enough. And she had tired herself out. She didn't move this much. And she was suprised she didn't fall this time. She'd usually fallen when she tried to run. Which had only been a few times. She was scared mother would catch her but she'd tried it a few times anyway. What she didn't know couldn't anger her. Alice sat down and pressed her back against the door. She was scared now. What had she done? This hadn't been a good idea. She was going to be in so much trouble. Alice let her eyes dart around the room. She hadn't had to deal with any kind of pain in a while. She could remeber how she handled it when mother had hit her but she didn't know what Zelena would want her to do. And she knew Zelena wouldn't likely tell her. Alice pulled her knees into her chest and burried her face into her lap. This was bad. Why had she done that? This was the one rule mother never let her break. Alice couldn't hear herself think over her breathing thaat had started to shake.

Zelena watched as Alice ran down the hall. That was a first. She'd never seen Alice try to run. It was great. She saw Alice make it to the door then just crumple back into herself. Okay so it wasn't great. But it was something. If she was careful she could use this to help Alice.

Zelena approached Alice and saw the shake in her body. It wasn't as slight as normal. This was a level of fear Zelena hadn't seen Alice have before. She was shaking so much Zelena wasn't sure she'd notice her.

"Hey," Zelena tried to adress Alice. She ignored her. Or didn't hear her. "Alice?"

Alice was so frightened she had stopped paying attention to her surroundings. It was better this way. Maybe she wouldn't feel anything. She didn't want to. Alice could hear every insult her mother had ever thrown her way rininging in her mind. She believed her. And right now she felt awful. The people here had been nothing but nice to her. And she had tried to anger Zelena. She was sure she'd succeeded. And now she had to deal with what the consequences would be. She wasn't ready for them. Alice closed her eyes tighter. She was already going to be in so much trouble. It was already going to hurt. She'd just wait until Zelena told her what to do.

Could Alice hear her?

"Alice?" there wasn't any response. "Please look at me?" No answer. Alice had completly stopped paying attention. Zelena should have known it wouldn't have been as easy as Alice just suddenly forgetting her entire life. "Okay, that's fine."

Zelena kept talking she wasn't sure if Alice could hear her or not right now. "It's okay." She kept trying to comfort Alice but no amount of talking seemed to pull Alice out of this. Zelena didn't want to touch her. She knew that she flinched away if anyone got close to her or walked by her too quickly. But it seemed like that might be the only way to get Alice to notice what was going on around her. And she couldn't just let her sit in front of the door all day. It wasn't safe. Zelena hoped this didn't break Alice's already fragile sense of confidence. It was good she was moving. But if this is how it ended? It wasn't.

Zelena tried talking to Alice again. When she didn't get a response she gently touched her shoulder. Barely touching it. Zelena wasn't even sure if she'd be able to feel it.

Alice flinched and looked up. Right. She'd done something bad. Zelena was touching her shoulder. For a second. Did she want her to get up? Should she get up? Alice could remeber mother grabbing her when she was angry and telling her to get up. But that had always hurt. That had always left a bruise. This? She could barely feel it. She didn't know what Zelena wanted her to do. She wanted to curl up and cry because she should have known better.

"It's okay." Zelena quicky realized that having a conversation while Alice was in this state would only frustrate them both. She'd try again later. She told Alice she'd be in the kitchen and tried to give Alice options of what to do. For a moment she wasn't sure Alice was going to respond. Alice decided to go to her room and did so.

Alice sat in the far corner of her room and clutched her blanket. She stared at the toy rabbit she held in her other hand. She talked to the rabbit quietly.

"I' 'sangryisn'tshe?" Alice shook her head. She didn't know if Zelena was ignoring what she'd done while she tried to figure out what to do about it or if she just didn't...Alice didn't know what the other was. She really hoped Zelena came back soon. The longer Alice had to wait the worse it'd be. Alice was angry at herself. It had been fine! She'd gotten used to not being in pain most of the time. It still scared her that no one ever yelled at her or hurt her but now things were going to go back to the way they were. And she had thought that was what she wanted but now she wasn't ready. She'd been starting to be...she didn't know what the word was. But she wasn't crying as much.

Zelena didn't know what to do. Alice had done something so bold and then shut down even further than normal. She'd never seen Alice lose her awareness of things. She'd completly shut down to a point even when Zelena phrased something in a way that normally would have had Alice doing it without any hestitation she didn't do it at all. Zelena didn't want to know what Alice thought was going to happen. She probably needed to, though. She wasn't going to ask. Or pry. It was time to focus as best as they could on the present situation.

Zelena decided a peace offering was best. She gathered some food to take over to Alice. This conversation was going to be hard. Alice had been frightened to a point Zelena wasn't sure she'd be able to talk to her about much of anything.

"I brought biscuits. And milk." Zelena set it in front of Alice who had thankfully stopped shaking and seemed to have relaxed.

"Sorry." Alice spit out a word quickly. Zelena wanted to sigh. She was pretty sure Alice hadn't done anything wrong. She knew Alice thought what she did was wrong.

"You're allowed to run," Zelena told her. Alice shook her head. No. No she wasn't. Zelena was supposed to be angry. She was supposed to hurt her. Alice was frustrated. This didn't make sense. "Do you want to eat your food in here or go outside?"

Alice stared at Zelena. Really? Even when she was supposed to be angry. Couldn't she just yell a little? Tell her that she didn't want her? Something! Alice held in a sigh. This place was never going to feel like home. Alice gave up. She couldn't anger her could she? "bemad." Alice begged. She just wanted to this over with.

"You _want _me to be angry?" Zelena questioned. Alice was so different than Robin was. Robin's teenage rebellion phase involved a cop car. The most rebllious thing Alice had done was break a rule Zelena had wanted her to break.

Alice nodded.

"Why?" Alice didn't knw how to explain it but she'd try.

" ." Alice knew that really wasn't enough to explain but she didn't like talking and she was scared talking to Zelena.

"Okay, you tell your rabbit why and I'll look away?"

Zelena turned around after Alice nodded.

"She' 'mscaredandIdiditonpurposeandi'msupposedtobeinpainwhenidobadthings."

The words were so rushed Zelena only got bits and pieces. But she heard Alice say she'd done it on purpose. Alice had been _trying_ to anger her. She knew sometimes kids acted out to she where the line was but this hurt her. Did Alice think she'd hurt her? Zelena wouldn't but was saddened Alice was so scared of everything. She needed to tell Alice she was allowed to do things. Zelena turned back around.

"It's okay. I'm not mad. Any time you want, you can move around. It's fine."

Alice thought about it. She wasn't sure. Was this a trap? It could be a trap. But Alice thought more and considered that even if it was Zelena would have gotten angry at her running and hurt her already. She'd try it. She'd be careful about it but she'd try it.

As long as no one saw her, it was okay wasn't it? She wasn't sure. But she'd tried to anger Zelena and instead of hurting her she'd brought her biscuits and comforted her. Alice thought for a little while. The thing she was afraid of didn't seem like it was going to happen. And she'd always really wanted mother to stop making her follow this rule. She'd never felt like she was allowed to do anything. Was it okay now? Alice was scared but she'd try what Zelena was telling her it was okay to try.

"Okay." But maybe she'd just try asking first? "Canigotothebathroom?"

Zelena would take it. It wasn't doing it on her own but it was better than waiting for Zelena to tell her she could go.

"Absolutley. Go for it." Zelena was tempted to do a bloody happy dance once Alice couldn't see her. It wasn't exactly what she'd wanted but Alice had _asked_ her instead of sitting until she was writhing and moaning in pain. It was progress. The tinest of steps but Alice was getting better. It'd still take time but she was getting better. She was starting to realize she wasn't in constant danger here. Zelena was thrilled. She really hoped Alice would come out of the bathroom on her own but when that didn't happen she went and found her.

"CanIhelpyoucook?" Alice whispered. She'd enjoyed doing that. And Zelena had just let her do what she wanted when she asked.

Zelena nodded in shock. "Yes." She made sure Alice had washed her hands and then let Alice help. Zelena was so excited but held in her excitement and calmly told Alice she was doing good whenever she asked something. Alice didn't say much else while helping Zelena but she'd take it. It was a huge step in the right direction.


	13. Chapter 13

Zelena was proud. Alice was doing so much better. She still thought she needed permission to do anything, but she'd started to ask for what she wanted or needed. She would rush the words together and would look away from Zelena, focusing her attention anywhere else while asking;but she had gotten to a point where she woulldn't always just wait for Zelena to tell her what to do. Zelena didn't always know what Alice was saying. She was quiet and her words didn't have space in between them.

Alice was still scared but she had been getting more comfortable. Zelena had let her do everything she'd asked for so far. Which hadn't been much. But it was more than she'd ever dared ask mother. And Zelena hadn't yelled or hurt her for anything. The thought that this could eaaisly change slowly crept into Alice's mind. She wouldn't leave her room without asking first. And in order to ask she'd have to wait for Zelena to come to her room.

"Hey, where's Alice?" Zelena asked when Robin walked into the kitchen as she was cooking. She wasn't sure if Alice had gotten any more confident or if she was waiting for her.

"She's in her room."

Zelena asked Robin to watch the stove and then walked over to Alice's room.

"Do you want anything?" Zelena asked. Alice was doing better but it wasn't perfect. She was still frightened and still had a litany of habits to unlearn. It was hard for Zelena but she knew as hard as it was it must be even harder for Alice who had likely never heard a kind word in her life before meeting Robin.

Alice glanced up at Zelena. She didn't know what she wanted. It was taking time for Alice to understand her own needs. She'd never had to really think about it before. Mother had always made her do things one way. Now that she could make her own decisions she didn't always know what she wanted or needed.

Alice shook her head. She didn't know. She had just woken up not too long before. Was she hungry? No. Did she want something to drink? No. Alice felt one of muscles clench. She needed the bathroom!

Alice was getting better at saying what she wanted. But she wouldn't always do it. Sometimes she still needed structure. Zelena would wait for Alice to tell her. She'd give her a chance to say something before offering her choices.

"CanIgotothebathroom?" Alice rushed the words together but Zelena understood enough of the sentance to know what Alice had asked her for.

"Yeah, go ahead." Alice folded the blanket and pushed it into the back of the corner. She clutched her toy rabbit tighter then got out of the corner and went to the bathroom. Alice used the restroom than sat down next to the door which she immeidatly staarted playing with as she always did when she had the chance to. She loved doing that. She waited for Zelena to come back. She still wasn't willing to move around compelty on her own. She still needed to at least make sure it was okay.

Zelena went to the bathroom and saw Alice playing.

"Are you having fun?" It pained Zelena that this was something that Alice enjoyed. She shouldn't have been so scared to do most things that she would hide in the bathroom playing until Zelena came to ask her if she wanted to go somewhere else. She should have had a real childhood. Zelena was angry for her. But she couldn't show that anger. It would only send Alice deeper into whicever corner she was closest to with her head burried into her knees in a panic.

Alice nodded. She was. Was that okay? Alice still didn't like talking enough to ask Zelena if it was okay but she did want to know.

Zelena waited, she was hoping Alice would tell her what she wanted to do. When Alice didn't say anything, Zelena decided to give her the smallest amount of structure.

"Alice, what do you want to do?"

Alice ran through the things in her mind. She didn't do much. She never had. Wasn't it time to eat? Isn't that what Zelena wanted her to do?

"CanIgoeat?" Alice whispered the words and they blurred together. Zelena would take it. It was closer.

"Yeah. It's not ready yet," Alice flinched thinking she'd made the wrong decision but then Zelena continued her sentance. "But we can go into the kitchen until it's ready."

Alice nodded and got up. She carried her toy rabbit with her into the kitchen then sat down in the kitchen corner.

Zelena took over for Robin.

"Hey," Robin greeted Alice who simply nodded her greeting. Alice wanted to play. She knew Zelena was okay with her playing and had newly discovered that asking tended to get her what she wanted. Which was something she hadn't quite adjusted to. It was getting easier every time she did it but it was still new to her. Mother had always hated when she'd ask for things. She'd still done it sometimes when she needed something but this was different. Zelena was okay with her wanting things. And she hadn't hurt her.

"Canweplayagame?" Alice whispered. Zelena didn't hear her, but Robin did.

"Yeah, sure." Alice shook her head violently. **NO!** She needed Zelena to tell her it was okay! Alice hugged her legs tighter to her chest.

"Okay, hey mom? Can Alice and I play cards?"

Zelena nodded. "Yeah, that's fine. If Alice wants to."

"There. All better?" Alice nodded.

Robin started to think about how this new system would work if Zelena wasn't around. Would Alice listen to anyone else? Robin worried. If there was an emergency would Alice sit frozen in fear because Zelena wasn't around to tell her it was okay? Robin silently cursed the girl's so-called mother and then went an retreived the decks of cards.

They played the game until the food was ready. Zelena set the plates of food on the table. Alice stayed sat in her corner.

"Alice, where do you want to eat?"

Zelena knew it was going to take more than just a few kind words to convince Alice she was safe. She just wished she'd do a little more. If Alice didn't respond for a few minutes Zelena was going to give her choices. "It's going to get cold. Where do you want to eat?"

Alice shook her head. She didn't care. Where did Zelena want her to be? Zelena held in a sigh and reminded herself that i was one step at a time. They couldn't push Alice further than she was ready for or they'd just scare her and Zelena felt like Alice had had enough fear for a lifetime. Far more, actually.

"Ok, that's fine. Do you want to eat at the table or right there?"

"Table?" Alice's voice hit a bit of a questioning tone. Sometimes she'd just guess what Zelena wanted her to do because she didn't understand how to make her own decisions. It'd been so long since she'd even tried to make most decisions. And when she had? Alie shuddered at the memories and the faint remains of long healed bruises and scars reminding her why she needed to be careful about what she did. She didn't know that she didn't actually need to be cautious.

"Ok."

Alice stayed in her corner. Zelena wished Alice would just walk to the table not even ten feet awaay rom her but she was waiting for the magical words of "you can." or "go ahead." Words Zelena was starting to wish Alice didn't know. Or at least didn't rely on so heavily.

"Ok, you can come eat." Alice nodded and did as she was told.

Henry walked in as they were eating.

"Hey, I'm here!" His loudness caused Alice to flinch.

"You're okay," Robin quickly comforted. "It's just Henry. He won't hurt you. He's just loud. He's not yelling at you."

Alice nodded and went back to her food and resumed her well practiced habit of darting her eyes around everywhere.

She finished her food and wanted to put her plate away. She also wanted to clean the mess in the kitchen. It wasn't her mess but she knew how to do that. And she was frustrated with how little she did here. She hadn't been left in the kitchen often enough, she though.

"CanIclean?" Alice asked. Zelena assumed she was talking about the plate in front of her and told her it was okay. Henry stared in shock as Alice asked for something and then moved. The last time he'd been around she'd needed perfectly clear choices and only said one or two worded sentences. She was still quieter than a mouse but she was asking questions and expressing what she wanted.

"Good job, Alice." Henry told her.

Alice ignored him and went and set the dish in the sink. She immediatly started cleaning the kitchen, with her eyes occasioanally glancing over to Zelena to see if it was okay. Zelena quickly realized that she'd misunderstood Alice's question. It wasn't her job to clean up the disaster that was the after effects of Zelena's cooking.

"Alice, that's okay. It's not your job to clean up after me." Zelena hoped this wouldn't hurt Alice's confidence. It felt like everything could.

Yes. It was. Alice was confused. Mother made her clean up after her all the time. That's how it worked. But she also wasn't supposed to argue. Alice darted her eyes back a forth between the still disaturous kitchen and Zelena. It was her job to clean. But she was supposed to do what she was told. But Zelena had said it was okay. Alice shook her head. Why was everything so confusing? Alice felt like no matter what she did she was going to get in trouble. So she turned back around and kept cleaning.

She set a plate onto the drainer and muttered, "Sorry."

She did this after every few dishes until she finished.

Zelena didn't know what to do. Alice clearly wanted to clean the kitchen but spent the entire time apologizing. Zelena wished that Alice would understand she was allowed to do whatever she wanted but she just couldn't get that through to her.

"It's okay, you didn't do anything wrong." Zelena said that and many different variants after every unwarranted apology. Was Alice ever going to be independant? Or was she going to spent the rest of her life waiting around for Zelena to tell her what to do? What would happen if Zelena had to leave for more than a few hours? When Alice finished Zelena didn't know whether to praise her or ignore what she'd done. But she'd apologized so much Zelena felt like she needed to tell her she was good. Zelena held in a groan. This was hard.

"Hey, Alice. Could you come here for just a minute?" Alice nodded and approached Zelena. She stayed a little bit away from her both from fear of pain and the rules her mother had about her personal space.

"Thank-you. You can help if you want to but you don't have to. And you certainly don't have to do it by yourself." Zelena prayed to the gods this would get through to Alice. Zelena knew she understood her words litterally but the emotions and deeper meanings were nearly always lost to Alice.

Alice held in a sigh. Was she allowed to clean or not? She decided she'd think about it later. She realized Zelena might be angry but she didn't want to stand in the middle of the kitchen all day. Alice sat down.

Zelena quikly told her she could go wherever she wanted. The hint of desperation in her voice revealing her wish that Alice would take it as a permenant request.

Henry was sitting at the table drawing. Alice sat down across from him and watched.

She picked up her rabbit she'd left of the table and held it.

"Hi, Alice."

Alice just nodded. Henry tried to make conversation with her even though he didn't expect any answers.

"Ever decide on a favorite food?"

Henry didn't get an answer and then remebered Alice would often not know that someone expected an answer from her.

"Alice, did you ever decide on a favorite food?"

Alice nodded. She had.

"What is it?"

"Spaghetti."

"That's a good food."

Henry continued drawing and sprinkled in a mostly one sided conversation.

Alice watched as Henry put color onto a sheet of paper. Mother had made her learn how to read and write but this didn't look like any writing she'd ever seen. And she couldn't read it.

"Do you want to try?" Henry asked after noticing Alice had been watching him for a while. He wasn't sure if she even knew how to hold a pencil but pushed an empty sheet of paper and handed her a few pencils to use. Alice nodded. Henry clearly really wanted her to try this. How had he done that though? She could write.

"Do you know how?" Henry asked her. Alice shook her head. She knew how to write. She'd try that. Alice really only knew how to spell things she'd had to do. She could sound it out, though. Al-ice. Alice wrote her name on the paper. "Okay, so you know how to write?" Alice nodded.

"Watch." Henry drew a simple shape and told Alice to mimic him. It took a few minutes but she got it. She drew small basic pictures all across the paper. Around lunch time Zelena came in and saw Alice's drawings.

"Those are nice," She told her. "I didn't know you liked to draw."

Alice shook her head, this time fairly calmly. She was getting more confident but was still scared. She hoped Henry would tell Zelena it was something she'd learned.

"I just taught her how. It was fun, Alice." Henry needed to head back to meet up with Ella. "I'm gonna go."

Alice tried to hand Henry back his art supplies. "You keep it. Maybe you'll show me whatever you draw next?"

Alice silently agreed.

Zelena walked Henry to the door.

"Thanks. She's still just so scared. I wish I could do more. But I can't."

"The fact you're worried means You're doing just fine Aunt Z. She'll get better. And by the way, her favorite food is spaghetti, apparently."

"I bloody knew it


	14. The Market

Zelena was growing more confident in Alice's ability to function. She was still easily scared, the slightest rise in volume or the smallest of sudden movements and she would curl in herself and desperatly clutch onto either her rabbit or a blanket, whichever was closer. Which more often than not the rabbit was. She'd slowly increased how often she'd ask for things. At first she'd only ask to go to the bathroom or to eat or clean. But she'd gotten far more confident with this new pattern. Zelena had been shocked the first time Alice asked if she could draw. She'd come near to fainting when Alice had asked her if she could go outside. Zelena had immediatly said yes to both request and then once Alice wasn't watching her she'd quietly let out a cheer. It wasn't perfect but she was growing less reliant on Zelena, which was bloody brilliant.

Alice was sitting at the table drawing when Zelena walked back into the kitchen she'd left for a little while.

"I'm going out today." Alice nodded.

"Ok." Alice wanted to go with but didn't know if she was allowed to. Mother had always told her no when she'd asked. But mother had also always had her behind a magical barrier. Would it be okay? Alice wasn't sure. And she was scared. Alice shook her head and continued drawing.

Zelena saw Alice shaking her head. "What's wrong?"

Alice shook her head. Nothing was wrong. She just wasn't sure if she was allowed to go or not. And she wanted to. But she didn't know if was okay to ask or not.

"You can do whatever you want to," Zelena told her. Alice nodded. She knew this but she didn't think it applied to going with Zelena. She wanted to ask. She hadn't gotten in trouble for asking to go outside, had she? No. Alice debated with her self for a little while.

"CanIgowithyou?" Alice rushed her words but Zelena understood her well enough now, usually. Zelena wasn't sure if it was a good idea or not. Alice was still so scared of the things around her here. But telling her no could easily send her spiralling back into not doing anything without Zelena telling her she could first. They'd finally gotten to a point Zelena was fairly cofident in Alice's ability to express what she needed, even if she wouldn't do it without asking. As long as someone was with her it would be fine, wouldn't it? Fine. Alice could come. Zelena wasn't sure if she was making the right decision.

"You can. Yeah."

Alice was a little excited. She'd never strayed further than a few steps away from the house and even when she did that she could either see Zelena or had Robin with her. This was going to be different than anything she'd ever done.

"Okay, let me go find Robin and then we'll go."

Alice nodded. Zelena went and found Robin. They got to where they needed to be after stopping several times to let Alice have much needed rest. She was gaining endurance but she still had spent most of her life rarely moving around and needed to take breaks.

Alice was exhausted by the time they got to the market which really wasn't that far away from their home but it was futher than Alice was used to walking at once.

Alice darted her eyes around. It was loud and there were so many people.

Zelena noticed Alice starting to get overwhelmed. Maybe this had been a bad idea? But it was what Alice had said she'd wanted and Zelena was pretty sure it wasn't dangerous.

"Are you okay?"

Alice nodded. It was just a lot going on. She was fine. "Alright." Zelena thought it better safe than sorry. "Try to stay with me or Robin, okay? If you get lost just stay wherever you are and we;ll come find you, okay?"

Alice nodded. "Alright." Zelena started walking and Alice trailed a little ways behind her with Robin standing next to her providing her with an explanation of everything around her.

Alice didn't like getting close to Zelena but she didn't mind standing next to Robin.

They walked around the market for a little while. Alice asked Robin a few questions about what things were and Robin answered her. This was good. Alice was doing really well. And then she bumped into someone. Alice quickly apologized and went to clutch the toy rabbit that had been forgotten on the kitchen table. In her blind panic that she couldn't comfort herself she lost sight of both Robin and Zelena. She knew Zelena had said stay where she was so she sat down in the road, not knowing any better. She'd just wait. She pulled her knees up to her chest.

She sat there for a few minutes and then heard a sound she'd never heard before. She didn't know it was the sound of horses pulling a carriage. Luckily, the driver managed to stopped the horses before colliding with her.

"What are you doing? Move!"

Alice shook her head after flinching because of how loud this stranger was being. Zelena had told her to stay put so she'd stay put.

The driver didn't see her shaking her head.

"Get out of the road!"

Alice stayed where she was. The driver dropped the reins and walked over to see if she could hear him.

"What are you doing?"

Alice stared at him with a blank stare for a moment.

"Waiting."

"Okay, whatever you're waiting for go wait for it somewhere else. You can't sit in the middle of the road."

Alice shook her head violentally. She didn't want to move. And she wasn't supposed to. And where was Zelena? Or Robin. Alice hugged her r legs tighter to her body and didn't know what to do. She started to shake a little.

"Okay then..." the driver had no idea how to handle whatever was happening.

Robin glanced over and noticed Alice wasn't standing next to her anymore. She had been talking to air for only the gods knew how long. But that's always what talking to Alice felt like. She didn't respond out loud much and Alice had run out of questions or gotten tired of asking them.

"Mom!"

Zelena glanced back. Shit! Where was Alice? She'd just been there with Robin not that long before.

"Where's Alice?"

"Don't know."

There weren't any smaller corners Alice could hide in so Zelena and Robin walked around asking everyone if they'd seen Alice. No one seemed to have an answer.

"Oh come on! Move! Get out of the road! What is wrong with you? Patheic little girl" Zelena heard someone yeling.

"Mom, I think someone found Alice." Robin was worried. Someone was yelling at Alice. They'd been so careful not to yell around her. They'd made sure every word they used was a kind one and in one trip someone had potentially destroyed all of that.

Zelena nodded with an equal amount of dread.

They went over and saw Alice sitting in the road. Zelena hid her sigh as a small yawn.

"Alice, can you come here, please?"

Alice nodded and did as she was told. Zelena didn't want to make a scene. Robin, however was not having it this time.

"You really shouldn't insult teenage girls." They walked away before hearing what the man muttered.

"Hey, Alice." Alice looked at Zelena. Had she done something wrong? The fear showed in her eyes. "No you're not in trouble. I told you to do that. That's my fault not yours. But you can't sit in the road, okay? It's not safe? The carriage could have hit you."

They finished up their trip and headed back to the house. Alice was exhausted when they got home. She was a little shaken from the day but Zelena and Robin had both spent half the trek home reassuring her that it was okay and so she wasn't too terribly upset. But she was exhausted.

"CanIgotobed?" Alice asked quickly.

Zelena told her she could and Alice walked into her room and fell asleep for a nap, too tired to bother with anything else.

"I should have been watching her," Zelena was upset with herself. It was so easy to forget that Alice needed her to help with everything. Zelena dreaded to think of what would have happened if the carriage hadn't been able to stop. Zelena sighed. This was harder than she'd ever thought it was going to be but it'd be okay. Eventually.


	15. The Idea

After the incident in the market Zelena had started to worry. The people in the enchaanted forrest weren't exactly all that understanding. And Alice couldn't be left alone for more than a few hours. She'd panic and hole up in the nearest corner and just Zelena was scared for her safety. She didn't undestand that she was allowed to do whatever she wanted. She'd gotten braver in one way but it hadn't actually solved the problem the way Zelena had thought it would.

She had slowly gotten better at exploring. Something about being outside made Alice more confident. This hadn't worked at the market since Zelena had given Alice directions that turned out to be suprisingly dangerous.

Alice had finished eating her food and really wanted to go outside.

"CanIgooutside?" Zelena told Alice she could and sent her and Robin both outside to play. As they were leaving Regina was entering the house.

"Hi, Aunt Regina." Alice flinched as she walked by her but continued and walked over to the nearest tree and then immeidatly sat down. She just wanted to be out here. She didn't really have anything specific she wanted to do. And now she didn't want to go back inside. Regina scared her.

Robin quickly caught up with Alice. "It's just Aunt Regina. She's not scary."

Alice shook her head. She was scary. And she didn't like being around her. "Canweplayagame?" Alice asked Robin. Robin had guessed Alice would want this evenually and went ahead ad borught the cards out. She dealt them both in and they played.

"So, how are you and Henry?"

"We're good. He and Ella are getting really serious."

"That's great."

"How are you? How's Robin? How's Alice doing?"

Zelena groaned. "Robin and I are fine. But Alice is just so _scared_. She sat down in the middle of the road the other day and woldn't move when someone else asked her to. I need a better system. If she can't see me she won't do things and I'm not always around. And I still don't know how she got seperated from Robin."

"When was she near the road?"

"Oh she ask for things now, it's great, really. But I don't want to tell her no and scared her out of doing it. So I agreed to let her come with me the last time I went to the market. Someone yelled at her and she completly shut down again."

Zelena was venting. This was difficult and she was frustrated with the impossible situation but Regina hadn't been around enough to be fully caught up.

"Again?"

"yeah a few weeks ago she just got up, ran down the hall, and then sat down and I couldn't even talk to her. She was so scared she stopped responding to things. Found out she wanted to see me angry. I didn't get angry because she wasn't doing anything wrong. I mean I have some choice words for the woman that dared call herself a mother but I hold that in and deal with it when Alice is asleep. She's already scared of just about everything don't need to add to it."

Regina remebered that back in the land without magic sometimes dogs could do jobs for people. "What if you got her a dog?"

"What?" Zelena laughed a little. In what world was getting a dog for someone that couldn't move on her own going to solve that problem?

"Back in the land without magic, some people use dogs to do things for them. What if you taught a dog to tell her she could do things? And taught Alice that asking the dog was the same as asking you?"

Zelena thought for a moment. It could work. If she trained, or really had someone else train, a dog o nod every time Alice started a sentence with "can i" she wouldn't wind up stuck in the road. And a dog would be able to let her pet them just as much as her toy rabbit. The dog would need to be a decent size. But not too big

"At this point, I'll try anything. And tell Tianna congratulations on winning that rebellion of hers."

Zelena sighed. _Guess we're gettting a dog._

It took a few weeks to find a dog and in the meantime Zelena was working on getting Alice to ask Robin instead of her. It hadn't been going so well. When they were outside Alice's guard fell a little but the minute they were inside she went back to thinking only Zelena had auhtority over her.

And then one day she and Robin were outside playing and Alice really needed the bathroom.

"CanIgotothebathroom?" Robin told her she could and hoped that she didn't want to wait for Zelena who was currently off looking for a dog.

Alice got up and went to the bathroom, for once ignoring Zelena's lack of presence and then sat in the bathroom until Robin came and found her.

"Are you done?"

Alice nodded. "Okay." Robin was about to walk away when Alice suprised her. Outdoors was one thing but usuallly if Alice asked for something and had to go inside she'd still wait for Zelena to confirm what Robin said. "Cangotomyroom?"

Robin hid her shock and told Alice to go ahead. Yes! Finally! She'd take Robin's word as well as Zelena's! This was great!

Robin composed herself and waited for Zelena to return. When she finally did she walked in with a dog. The dog was alrady house trained and knew the baasic commands. All that was left was to teach the dog how to help Alice.


	16. The Dog

**A/N: I am taking creative liscenes. But service dogs are in reality far more complicated then this. And take like 2 years to train. But we're going to assume the dog is already perfectly trained bc magic of storytelling and all that's left is task training. Cool? Cool.**

The first thing Zelena needed to do was see how Alice would react to a dog. She hadn't fully thought this through. But Alice had seemed to like animals. She talked to the squirell that would climb in her lap.

"Alice, I want you to meet someone." Alice listened to Zelena but stayed quietly tucked in her corner until she said more. "Can you come here, please?" Zelena hoped this idea of Regina's would work. She couldn't be around all of the time. And it'd already been made clear that Alice wouldn't do anything if she wasn't. Alice came out of her room and found Zelena standing next to something she didn't understand. It looked like she could pet it. "Hi. This is Luna. Do you want to pet her?" Zelena offered.

Alice nodded and did as she was told and tried to pet the strange animal. "Luna's a dog. She's going to come live with us." Zelena didn't want to overwhelm Alice just yet so she wasn't going to explain what Luna was for at the moment. "I'm gonna let you two get to know each other. Zelena dropped the dog's leash and bent down to unhook it. Unfortunatley the sudden movement quickly frightened Alice into herself. She pulled her knees up to her chest and tried to grab at the blanket she wasn't sitting on. She quickly reaalized her mistake and grabbed onto the skirt of her dress instead. Luna glanced at Alice and seemed to know she was upset. She walked over and forced her snout in between Alice's knees, making her have to pay attention to her instead. Alice stroked Luna who laid down in Alice's lap. The weight calmed her down. Zelena thought a moment. Could the dog be taught to do that all the time? That was the fastest Zelena had ever seen Alice calm down. She'd gone from being near shutting down to calmly talking to the dog nearly immediatly.

She'd ask Regina, she knew more about this stuff than Zelena did.

The next couple of days went fairly well. Luna had quickly taken to Alice and followed her around everywhere. Which Alice seemed to enjoy. She had someone to talk to all the time, something she'd never had.

Alice was sitting at the table drawing when she accidentally knocked her toy rabbit off the table. She couldn't reach it but instead of being frightened that she'd lost what comforted her she reached over and started to pet Luna which calmed her down enough she'd forgotten she'd dropped something.

When Alice was sleeping Zelena and Robin had been working on training the dog. Alice still took a lot of naps.

"Ok, Luna. Cani?" And Robin waved a treat to lure the dogs head into a sort of nodding postion. It took a month before Luna had finally gotten that one down.

They finally got Luna to a point where she could do what they'd inteded for her to do. Zelena wasn't sure how she ws going to get Alice to believe the dog could fill in for her. They'd also managed to reward Luna for comforting Alice and whenever she got frightened Luna would force her out of the ball she was in and beg her for attention. Which Alice happily provided. And the distraction managed to make her forget what had scared her enough that she wouldn't worry so much about it.

Alice was sitting in the corner of the kitchen petting Luna when Luna started to run in circles.

"She needs to go to the bathroom," Zelena told her. Alice nodded. No one else was around and Alice didn't know how to walk the dog. "I'll be right back." Zelena attached a leash to Luna's collar and was getting ready to walk outside.

"Canigowithyou?"

Alice had gotten so much better at asking for things. That was usually the extent of Alice's convversational abilities.

Luna nodded. "Yeah, you can. Luna agrees."

Alice got up and walked outside with Zelena and Luna.

"Here" Zelena handed Alice the leash. She wanted to see how she handled this. Alice stood there until Luna walked far enough away she had started to pull on the leash. "You can follow her."

Alice started to walk close to Luna until she peed in the grass. Luna wanted to go back inside but somehow knew Alice needed a little help with that.

"Alice do you want to go inside or do you want to stay out here?"

This would be the first time Alice was outside by herself. And Zelena was going to watch from the window.

"Outside." Zelena was glad this was working so far. Hopefully Alice would understand what she wanted her to do?

"Okay, just ask Luna when you come in. She can answer for me. Okay?"

Alice nodded.

Zelena went inside. She watched as Luna sniffed around and forced Alice to move every so often.

Alice sat outside for a little while.

"shewantsmetolistentoyou,iguess?iwishyoucouldtalkthat'dhelp." Alice sighed. The dog couldn't talk to her. But if she had a yes or no question? She didn't know how the dog would tell her no? She'd find out. Alice sat and pet Luna for a while.

"CanIgoinside?" Luna nodded and Alice listened to her. She walked inside and then stared at the piece that she'd been holding onto. She didn't know how to undo it.

Zelena came over and showed Alice how to unhook the leash. She'd forgotten to tell Alice what she was doing and her sudden presence had Alice on the gorund curling up immediatly. Luna walked over and shoved her faace inbetween Alice's knees and stomach, exactly as she was supposed to. Once Alice calmed down she decided she wanted to sleep. She glanced around the room looking for Zelena. She couldn't find her. She had told her that she could ask Luna. Hadn't she? Did that apply to all the time? There had never been a dog in the tower? Maybe it was okay? She'd just ask Luna. Alice hoped this was okay.

"CanIgotomyroom?" Luna nodded.

Alice walked to her room with Luna trailling behind her. Zelena went to find Alice and saw she wasn't in the place she'd last left her. Had it worked? It had bloody well worked. Zelena saw Alice sitting in her room quietly talking to Luna.

"Ihopeitwasokay."

Zelena bent down to Alice's level. She didn't like when people towered over her and it was impossble with the way her fort was set up, anyway.

"Good job. All the time. You can listen to Luna. Great."

Alice thought for a little while. It would be easier, wouldn't it? Luna always followed her around. She wouldn't have to wait for Zelena. She really hoped Zelena wouldn't get angry at her for it. She'd gotten used to not being in pain all the time. Alice nodded. She could do what Zelena was asking.

Zelena made a vest for Luna to wear. Although, Zelena didn't think it was going to be used anytime soon. Alice wasn't ready, and if she was Zelena was too scared of having a repeat of the last time they'd gone out in public. They'd try again in a little while.


	17. Confrontation

Robin had missed defending people that needed it. The carrige driver had been so cruel to Alice. And Robin hadn't been able to tell him what was _wrong._ She could have but it would have been a detriment to Alice who was already getting close to panicking. And so Robin was sitting in the market hoping the carriage driver would show up so she could tell him why he should have been nicer. Alice was at home with Zelena and Luna.

Robin couldn't believe her luck. She hadn't been there that long and the exact man she was waiting for was there.

"Hey! Jerkwad!."

The carriage driver only stopped because Robin had fired an arrow rather close to the front of his carriage awyas behind his horses' tails.

"You again?"

"Do you want to know why that girl wouldn't listen to you?"

The carriage driver couldn't have cared less but if it would get this child who was suprsingly good with a bow off his back?

"Fine, whatever."

"She thinks she needs permission to move. She was horribly treated up until a few months ago when my mom took her in. And she only listens to my mom. And it's terrafying. You completley ruined the first time she'd managed to get out of the house in her life. She was kept as a prisoner until my mom took her in. We don't know what all her so-called mother did to her. But she is _teraffied_ of the world. She thinks anytime someone raises their voice she's going to wind up getting hurt. We'd finally gotten her to where she'd at least talk to us and the first time she'd asked to go somewhere you yelled at her. And she was doing what she thought she was told to do. Just be a little kinder."

The carriage driver listened in horror as Robin explained why Alice had been so reluctant to just get out of the road.

"I didn't know all of that. Any chance I can help?"

Robin shook her head. "No. You've done enough."

And with that Robin left the carriage driver to think about what he'd done.


	18. Chapter 18

Alice woke up and pet Luna. She had learned slowly that Zelena wouldn't be angry if she asked Luna for things. She hadn't dared do it often at first and she'd tried to wait for Zelena most of the time but had quickly realized Zelena wanted her to ask Luna if she couldn't find her nearby quickly. She still didn't like it if anyone saw her moving or if they saw her in a place she hadn't asked Zelena if she could go but she was working on it.

"CanIgotothebathroom?" Luna quickly nodded, as she'd be trained to do then followed as Alice walked to the bathroom. Alice did what she needed to do, washed her hands, then sat down and pet Luna some more. She played with the door for awhile. When Alice decided she was done with that she asked Luna if she could go in the kitchen. Luna told her she could and they both went into the kitchen and sat down in the corner.

Alice was just grabbing her toy rabbit and then she was going to go back to her room and no one would ever know. She picked up the rabbit.

Henry had spent the night, avoiding seeing Ella just before their wedding.

Henry walked into the kitchen. Alice immediatly sat down, panicked. She hadn't asked Zelena. And she'd gotten caught. No. At least it was just Henry? He didn't have any authority over her. He couldn't hurt her. She hoped he hadn't seen her.

"Hey, Luna. Hey, Alice." Henry paused. That was weird. Had Alice slept in the kitchen? He could have sworn she'd gone to bed just before he had. "Alice?"

Alice nodded at him. She wasn't going to talk more than she had to. "Did you sleep in here?" Henry was a little worried for her.

Alice shook her head.

"Ok. Wait...how'd you? How'd you get in here?"

Alice pointed at Luna. "Luna."

Henry wasn't going to question it much further. Alice was handling herself fairly well, she did seem scared. Henry figured it was likely of him at the moment. "Okay, need anything?" Alice shook her head and Henry walked away with his breakfast in tow.

Zelena came in and saw Alice sitting in the corner. Zelena was ready to cheer. She'd done it! Alice had actually left her room on her own! Well, mostly. Zelena was sure Alice had asked Luna which was fine with her.

"Sorry." Alice shot out before Zelena could finish her silent cheer. No. She'd been so close. Did Alice still believe in this dumb rule?

"No, Alice." Alice flinched. No meant she was going to have to deal with pain. Pain she was starting to forget how to handle but still almost missed. It'd made everything clear about what mother had wanted from her. Alice pulled her legs up to her chest even tighter and apologized again before Zelena had a chance to finish her sentance. Luna shoved her face in between Alice's chest and knees forcing her to pay attentin to Luna and not her fear. Zelena held in a sigh. She wished she knew what would and wouldn't scare Alice. It felt like everything she did just pulled Alice further away from understanding that she was safe. "It's okay. Good job moving. Do you want to pick what we eat for breakfast or want me to do it?"

Zelena hoped Alice would take this as a reward but didn't want to force her into doing something she didn't want to do.

Alice didn't want to pick. Did Zelena want her to? And was it really okay to come into the kitchen on her own? Alice didn't understand. Everything had changed so qucikly. And she still missed home. Home had made sense. This place still didn't. She was still scared.

Zelena waited for an answer. Alice was rarely quick with decisions and this was the first one that wasn't clear choices. Zelena thought a moment she hadn't given Alice choices. She waited another minute to see if Alice had something she really wanted.

Alice didn't know if she could eat what she liked for breakfast. So far it seemed they'd only had it as a dinner food. She hoped Zelena didn't get angry. "I."

"Yeah, you can pick. What'd you want? Anything."

"Spaghetti?" Zelena should have known what she was going to pick. It wasn't quite a breakfast food but Zelena didn't bloody care. Alice had made a decision. Hell, if she'd asked for cake Zelena would have obliged. A sudden realization dawned on Zelena. Alice hadn't had cake before. That was it. There was going to be cake after breakfast.

"CanIhelp?" Luna nodded and Zelena immediatly agreed with the dog.

As they were cooking Zelena talked to her telling her about the upcoming wedding and everything going on with that. Alice listened but didn't really know what Zelena was talking about. The food was ready pretty quickly and Zelena thanked Alice for helping her.

They ate their less than conventional breakfast.

"And we have cake as well."

Alice didn't know what cake was. Zelena handed Alice a slice of cake. Alice tried it. It was really sweet. She enjoyed it

"Do you like it?" Alice nodded.

Alice reached over and pet Luna once she was finished.

Zelena got up to clean the kitchen after laying some paper and pencils on the table for Alice to draw with. "I'm going to deal with this mess, you color or do whatever you want to."

Alice was confused. Those three different orders were conflicting. _Deal with this mess_ and _color_ and d_o whatever you want to. _Which did Zelena want from her? How was she supposed to do all three at once? Alice shook a liitle. She couldn't do anything right this time. No matter what she was going to wind up angering Zelena. Alice shut her eyes tight. She could think better if she couldn't see what she was scared of. She opened them again, no she needed to watch Zelena. She was going to anger her no matter what she did. Alice tried to weigh her options. She immediatly dismissed coloring as one. It was fun and if no matter what she did Zelena was going to be angry? She wasn't going to pick the fun one. That would only make everything worse. And Zelena couldn't possibly know what she wanted to do. Alice didn't know what she wanted to do. She knew Zelena had said she was going to deal with this mess but that was _wrong_. That was Alice's job. The only reason mother kept her around besides her being the key to her freedom. Alice tried to pull her legs up to her chest, but she was sitting on the chair and it didn't hold the way she was sitting. The chair fell along with Alice. Who didn't make a sound. Alice's wrist suddenly hurt but she'd felt that before. She thought she deserved the pain and if she admitted what caused it? It'd only cause more. Mother had hated when she said she was in pain. Why would she tell Zelena exactly where she was already in pain? At best she'd ignore it and at worst she'd use it to punish Alice for ignoring what she'd told her to do. Alice sat up, carefully avoiding putting any weight on the wrist she'd landed on and burried her face in her knees. Or tried to. Luna wouldn't let her. Alice gently pushed Luna out of her way with her noninjured hand and reburried her face in her knees. Couldn't she just hide? She was scared. Luna forced Alice's face out of her lap again and laid down. Alice was still terrafied but Luna wouldn't let her show it. She'd made noise, and kind of moved without asking, and she hadn't done any of the things Zelena wanted.

Zelena heard a crash and looked over to see a knocked over chair and Alice sitting with her face burried in Luna's fur. Oh come on. What had she said? Had she frightened Alice somehow? Zelena scanned through her thoughts. She'd given Alice clear choices. She thought again. No. She hadn't. She'd told her to do those things. Not asked if she wanted to do them. Zelena could have screamed. She needed to be more careful with the words she said around Alice. She knew this.

Zelena didn't know what had caused the chair to fall but Alice seemed physically fine. Just frightened. Zelena would watch to make sure Alice wasn't hurt but she did seem fine.

"You didn't do anything wrong, Alice. I'm sorry if I scared you."

Alice was hoping Zelena wouldn't notice the pain she was in. It hurt but she could handle it. It'd go away on its own. All pain did eventually. This was just like when she'd fallen trying to run. She shook a little. "CanIgotomyroom?" Alice shook more realizing she'd asked Zelena a question. But she'd said that was okay, hadn't she? Alice was frightened but tried to ignore it. Zelena quickly told Alice it was okay and Alice retreated to her room. Alice promptly decided she would stay in her room unless Zelena needed her. And she hoped that she wouldn't. She could hide what had happened if she stayed in her room but the second she needed to do something? The fact she wouldn't use one of her hands as much would be a giveaway that she'd managed to hurt herself by doing something she wasn't supposed to.

Alice stayed in her room for a while. Zelena was used to Alice hiding whenever she'd been frightened.

Alice held her injured wrist, trying to make it hurt less but it only made it worse. She held in a sigh. It was on the side she usually used for everything. She hoped Zelena wouldn't notice. Alice let go of her wrist, holding it wasn't helping.

Robin came over to the fort and offered to play cards with Alice. Alice agreed but avoided using her right hand. Or tried to. She dropped the cards when she tried to point with the hand that was holding them. Alice hoped Robin would just assume she didn't want to play right then.

"Sorry."

"Alice, are you okay?"

Alice nodded.

"Okay. Are you done playing for now?"

Alice nodded and Robin walked away.

Alice went further back into the corner of her room and finally let the tears fall. Her wrist hurt and she'd have to wait it out. She hadn't had this kind of pain in a while. She wished it'd go away. It hurt and she knew it'd take a few days to stop hurting. Alice wondered if Zelena would let her stay in her room for a few days. If she could just hide for a few days then the pain would go away before Zelena found out about it and it wouldn't cause anymore. Alice closed her eyes for a minute trying to think of anything else.

She fell asleep and then woke back up to the sound of a chair being picked up from the floor.

Zelena finsihed cleaning the kitchen just in time for lunch. She made sandwhiches then went and asked Alice if she wanted to eat in the kitchen or in her room.

Alice quickly said she wanted to eat in her room and pointed to the floor. Zelena thought for a moment. Alice was using a different hand then she usually did to point. She assumed it was just a fluke and brought Alice her food. Which she picked up with her nondominant hand. Since when did Alice try to eat with one hand? Was something wrong? Zelena hoped not.

"Are you okay?" Zelena asked.

Alice quickly nodded. She was fine. She didn't want to anger Zelena. "Alright. Do you need anything?"

Alice shook her head. She was fine. She hoped she could stay in here a while longer.

Zelena didn't see Alice again until dinner time. When she again said she wanted to eat in her room. Alice hadn't come out of there since that morning. Surely she needed to use the bathroom?

"Alice, do you need to use the bathroom?"

Alice wished she could avoid it but she couldn't. She needed to pee. Alice dreaded having to wash her hands. Her wrist still really hurt.

"You can go if you need to."

Alice nodded and got up. She walked to the bathroom and did everything as she normally would but used a different hand than normal. She sat down next to the door after washing her hands but didn't touch the door. Her wrist hurt too much.

Alice clutched her injured wrist up until she heard footsteps approaching the bahtroom. She let go. Zelena walked in and saw Alice sitting without anything in her hand. A little odd but she had probably just finished playing with the door.

Zelena coaxed what Alice wanted to do out of her and told her she could. Alice went back to her room and fell asleep.

* * *

Zelena worried. Alice had been acting add for the past day or so. She'd been avoidant. Well, more avoidant than usual and she chose to stay in her room even more often. She absolutley didn't want to draw when Henry offered her that option and kept picking things up with a different hand than usual. And only using one hand even when she'd normally use two. Something was wrong. And Zelena had no idea what it was. She thought for a little while. Wait. Had Alice gotten hurt when she'd fallen? She'd looked fine. And she hadn't said anything. Zelena hadn't tried to ask. Zelena held in a sigh. She'd forgotten that Alice might not have the ability to communicate her pain. Or might be scared to for some reason.

Alice was sitting in the corner of the kitchen holding her toy rabbit in her noninjured hand.

"Hey, can we talk?" Zelena asked her. Alice blinked, no. Zelena couldn't know. If she did she'd hurt her for doing something that caused her pain. Or use the pain she was already in against her. She deseperatly tried to think of a way out of this. She hoped Zelena wouldn't notice the fact she wasn't putting any weight on her wrist.

Alice nodded but the fear didn't leave her mind or her eyes. "You're not in trouble." Zelena tried to comfort Alice. This was already not off to a great start. "Are you hurt?"

Zelena hoped that Alice would just admit it. She knew she was hurt somehow.

Alice shook her head. "No." Alice knew this wasn't much better but if she just hid it, it'd go away on its own.

"Alice, where are you hurt?" Alice didn't want to tell Zelena. It'd just be used against her and she'd she'd tried to lie. She was going to be in so much trouble. Alice wanted to hide it. She didn't want to tell her. But Zelena had seen right through the lie.

Zelena didn't have any idea why Alice was so scared of telling her she was hurt. She was now a little scared herself of how she was going to manage to heal any injury. Alice suddenly didn't strike her as the type to allow anyone to heal her.

"Alice, I know it's scary. But, do you want to show me where it hurts or do you want to tell me?" Zelena had learned her lesson about phrasing things carefully.

Alice pointed to her wrist. "Okay your wrist hurts. Thank-you. Can I see your wrist?"

Alice was terrafied and it hurt and she didn't want to put the currently vulnerable part of her body close to Zelena. It'd only cause more pain. Alice reached her noninjured wrist over to Zelena. She'd done what she was told. She hoped this wouldn't anger Zelena.

Zelena took a second to internally be proud of Alice's mild defiance. But she did need to see how bad the injury was. "Alice, yes good. I guess I wasn't clear. But this one is fine. Can I see your other wrist, please?" Zelena was begging. This was exhausting and the quicker she found the injury the less time she'd have to force Alice into being frightened. She didn't like scaring her.

Alice warily reached the wrist that was already in pain to Zelena and shut her eyes tight. She didn't want to watch.

"Alice, I am not going to hurt you." Zelena reminded her. Alice still didn't understand that one. Zelena quickly realized she shouldn't have promised that. "I am going to try to be gentle. If it hurts, please tell me."

Zelena avoided touching Alice's wrist. She could clearly see it had slightly swollen. She must have sprained it when she fell. "Ok, it's just a sprain. I do need to wrap it. I have to touch you for that. Is that okay?"

Alice wanted to say no but knew butter and gave a weak nod. Why was Zelena even bothering to see what was wrong? Couldn't she just get to the part where she hit her? Alice wanted to get this done with. She just wanted to go back to her room and let the pain go away on its own.

"I'll be right back."

Alice nodded. She considered hiding but knew better. Instead she clutched her toy rabbit tighter and started voicing her worries.

"Doyouthinkshe'lldothethingshesaidbeforeoraftershehitsme?"

Zelena walked back just in time to hear that Alice thought she was going to hurt her. Zelena saw red. This teenage child was muttereing her fears to a stuffed animal. Zelena wanted to hunt down whoever had done this to her. But first she needed to splint Alice's wrist.

"Ok, this part might not be very fun. But I'm not going to hit you." Zelena was still livid that she needed to tell her she didn't want to hurt her. Alice didn't feel safe at all, did she? "It may hurt a little while I wrap it. You can stop me at any point if it hurts, okay? Just tell me to stop. I will." Zelena hoped Alice would stop her if anything hurt but highly doubted she would.

Alice nodded. She wasn't going to tell Zelena to stop. No matter how much it wound up hurting. But she wanted to believe that Zelena wasn't going to hit her this time. She didn't, though.

"So, can I see your wrist?" For a second time Alice reached the wrong one over to Zelena. "Alice, I know you don't trust it. And I know you're in pain but I need the other wrist."

Alice warily reached her injured wrist over to Zelena. "Thank-you. Okay see these?" Zelena held up the bandages. "I'm going to use them to wrap your wrist. And this?" Zelena held up a small wooden object. "Is to hold your wrist in place. So you don't hurt it further moving it around."

Alice just wanted this to be over.

"Okay." Zelena very gently laid Alice's wrist down in her own hand. Alice held in the whimper. It'd started to hurt more as she ignored it but she wouldn't show Zelena she was in pain. She could do this.

Zelena tried to talk to Alice the entire time as she bandaged her wrist with the splint inside of it. "Okay, all done. Really good. You did really good." Alice quickly pulled her wrist back to her body. And grabbed it with her other hand, holding them both tightly to her chest. The wooden thing was weird. She wanted it off.

Zelena watched as Alice watched her with fear and decided it was best to walk away.

"Do you need anything?"

Alice shook her head and Zelena walked away. Alice didn't like it. The wood forced her wrist to stay in place. She hadn't intended to move her wrist but she didn't like not being able to. She grabbed the stick and pulled on it. Ow. It hurt when she did that. She grabbed the bandage and loosened it. She pulled the stick out and set it next to her. She couldn't figure out how to completly undo the bandage so she'd leave it alone.

Zelena came back and saw the bandage loosened and the splint gone.

Zelena hadn't told Alice she had to leave it there or really for how long. Zelena sighed. Alice didn't understand the splint was there for a good reason.

Zelena sat down in front of her. Alice glanced over to her.

Alice didn't know if she'd done something wrong or not. "Sorry." Alice erred on the side of caution.

"You didn't do anything wrong, it's okay. But I do need to put the splint back in. Where is it?" Alice stared at Zelena. What was a splint? "The litle wooden thing that was inside your banadage. Where is it?"

Alice picked up the wooden piece. "Can I see it?" Alice nodded and handed it to Zelena then immeidatly pulled away with an apology. She wasn't supposed to touch her. "Thank-you. I have to put this back in. It'll keep your wrist stable. It'll make it so it heals faster. You just have to wear it a few days. That's it. I know it's not fun."

Alice stared at her. She didn't want it on there but if she had to. Alice reached her wrist over. "Ok. Thank-you. I'm going to unwrap this bandage first." Zelena unwrapped the bandage the entire time telling Alice she was doing good. "Great. Alright. Now I'm going to set the splint then rewrap it. I'm setting the splint. it's okay. You've got this. Okay now I'm going to rewrap it." Zelena wrapped Alice's wrist and told her she was done. "Okay, that was good. Do you want cake?"

Alice nodded. "Alright. It's just for a few days. It has to stay in. I know it's not fun." Zelena handed Alice a slice of cake. Alice ate her food but kept glancing at the splint. She wanted it off. It was bothering her. Alice grabbed at it again and pulled. Which didn't work.

Zelena sighed. She didn't want to force Alice to do anything. This was one of the few things Alice seemed able to do on her own and Zelena was going to have to stop it.

"Alice, the splint has to stay in for a few days. Does it hurt?"

Alice shook her head. It just made it hard to do anything. And she already couldn't do much. How was she going to clean with her wrist like this?

"Okay, what's wrong with it?"

Alice thought a minute. "Can'tmoveit."

"You can't move your wrist?"

Alice nodded.

"That's the point of it. It's so you don't hurt yourself. It's just for a few days. Can you handle it for a few days or can you not?" Zelena didn't know what her plan was if Alice wouldn't leave the splint alone but luckily didn't have to think of one.

Alice didn't want to but nodded and agreed she'd leave it alone.

**A/N: Thanks to bstormhands for basicaally betaing this chapter. and the ideas for how to write it. **


	19. The Leash

It had been a month or so since Zelena had brought Luna home. She'd helped Alice a lot and Alice had started to trust the dog, even going as far as to be the one to walk her. Only ever a few steps away from the house and she only did it if Zelena said it was okay but it was a good way to get Alice to go outside almost alone. Her wrist had healed and Alice was happy not to have any sort of physical restraint again. And Zelena was glad not to have to watch Alice struggle with even more task than usual. Trying to help her clean had only lead to her being even more frightend so Zelena had backed off and tried to let Alice know that she'd help her if she wanted it.

Alice was outside, sitting in her favorite patch of grass watching the flowers. Luna kept running over to her and trying to get her to chase her, to no avail. Luna dragging the cloth leash alongside her through the mud.

Alice was ready to go inside and called Luna over to her. Luna bounded over and picked up her leash, dropping it in Alice's lap. Robin had taught her this when Alice had made it clear she wouldn't know when to pick it up if not told somehow. It'd taken a little while but Luna had learned how to help Alice and Alice had accepted her as a friend. And didn't mind asking for her help.

"CanIgoinside?" Luna nodded and Alice grabbed her leash and walked inside with her. She'd taken a few days to learn how to use the leash but had been shown where to put it. Alice unhooked it and hung the muddy cloth rope on its hook. "Canigotmyroom?" Luna nodded and followed Alice to the corner of the living room where they both adjusted themselves into comfortable positions. Alice pet Luna for a minute and waited. She didn't know what she wanted to do now.

Zelena saw Alice and Luna come in but didn't say anything. The second Zelena made her presence known Alice would assume she had to ask her to do what she wanted and Zelena had been trying to avoid that. She wanted Alice to feel like she was allowed to make her own choices.

Zelena saw the cloth leash covered in mud and decided Luna could use a better leash. Zelena would pick one out while she was gone. Zelena went over to the corner and got down to Alice's level.

"I'm going out. Need anything before I go?" Alice shook her head. If she needed anything while Zelena was gone she could ask Luna, couldn't she? "Okay, just ask Luna if you do. Alright?"

Alice nodded.

Zelena left.

Zelena stared at the various leash options. The cloth one had degraded and succumbed to the elements far too quickly. And Luna dragged the leash around. Nothing with anything sharp attached since Luna put it in her mouth and Alice tended to just grab whatever part of the leash happened to be the closest to her, not neccesarily the handle.

Zelena picked a smooth leather leash and headed home. She took the cloth leash off it's hook and replaced it with the new better one and didn't think anything of it. She'd show it to Alice when she had a chance.

Alice was sitting at the table drawing when Zelena asked if she wanted to walk Luna with her. Alice agreed and followed Zelena, carefully timing her strides so she wasn't too close to Zelena.

Alice glanced at the hook and saw the leash wasn't there any more. In it's place something that scared her. A long leather strap. Alice stared at it and hoped it wasn't going to be needed. She hadn't done anything, had she? Alice shook a little, slowly losing herself in a memory of her childhood. A time when she was young and wanted mother to run around the tower with her. A time before she'd known what the consequences of that would be.

* * *

_She'd tried to get mother to run with her but had bumped into her and caused her to drop something. It certainly wasn't the first time mother had hit her but this time she looked angrier than she normally did._

_"Sorry."_

_"As you should be. I've told you not to run. Look what you did. Clean it up. I'll be right back." Alice had been suprised mother hadn't hit her for that. She did as she was told, relieved that mother wasn't going to hurt her for once. And then she came back holding a long piece of leather._

_"Okay, you finished cleaning." Mother had reached down and forced Alice to stand up. There was some yelling, Alice was sure but it had been such a long time ago. "This is going to hurt. It's going to hurt a lot and it's going to teach you a lesson. Do you want to guess what that lesson is?"_

_"Norunning." Mother had still hit her for talking to her. It had only been with her hand. Alice had been used to that._

_"So you do listen. You just choose to ignore me. Okay, fine. Turn around. Look at the wall."_

_Alice had done exactly as she was told. Mother was scaring her. More than she usually did. Mother had yelled. Alice couldn't remeber everything she'd said. Mother had struck her with the leather strap. Alice was young and it hurt and she let out a scream of pain and shock. She'd never felt this before and she didn't know what was happening. She'd felt mother hit her before but this hurt in a different way and it hurt a lot more._

_"No!" Mother had struck her again. Alice screamed again "We will do this until you stop screaming." Another strike, Alice screamed again. It hurt and mother barely paused in between hits, yelling about what Alice had done wrong the entire time. "Fine. Have it your way. The more you scream the worse this gets for you. If you make me do this a long time you **will **regret it." Alice had nodded, terrafied. She couldn't help it. It hurt. It really hurt. Alice tried to stop screaming. But mother was faster than her thoughts could be and before she had decided how to stop herself from screaming mother had already struck her three more times. She screamed again, it hurt and she couldn't stop it. "No!" Mother had punctuated her scolding with a strike from the piece of leather. Alice had managed to find a way she thought might work. She wound up biting her tongue, choking back the amount of pain she was in. She still let out a whimper. "Okay, do I need to do this again?" Mother had yelled at her. Alice shook her head. She hadn't screamed that time. She didn't need to do it again. "I. Told. You. To. Stop." Mother had struck in between each word. She paused a moment. "No sound. None. Got it?" Alice nodded, bracing herself for the next few strikes mother was going to inflict, except there was nothing but the air in front of her to brace herself on. She closed her eyes tight and let the silent tears of her pain fall down her face. She didn't have it in her to fight it any more. It hurt and she hoped mother would never need to do this again. She'd just wanted it to stop. Mother had struck her with the piece of leather, yelling at her for the whimper. She wanted to apologize but wasn't sure if that would anger mother more. "What, you're not even going to say sorry?" Alice shook her head. She'd said no noise. "You're right, I did tell you not to talk. But I'm still going to finish this." Mother had paused for a moment to talk and Alice had thought it was done. It'd hurt so much and she had silent tears rolling down her face. Mother had struck her a few more times then roughly grabbed her shoulder and made her turn around a face her._

_"Sit."_

_Alice sat down. Mother had towered above her. "Are you crying?" Mother had taunted her. Alice had nodded, terrafied mother would make her go through that again. She'd simply told her to stand back up, Alice had shook. She couldn't do that again. She didn't think she'd be able to hold in at least a whimper. "Don't worry, i'll take it easy. You weren't horrible about the strap." Alice shook still waiting for some kind of pain. Mother had simply hit her with her hand and yelled that she wasn't allowed to cry. Crying was usually noisy and she didn't want to deal with it. "And besides, you deserve the pain. If you'd just listen to me I wouldn't have to hurt you now would I?"_

_Alice shook her head. "That's what I thought. Sit."_

_Alice immediatly sat back down. "So, did you learn your lesson?"_

_Alice nodded. She'd learned a lesson. Maybe not the one mother had meant. She'd learned that mother was more than a little scary. She was terrafying. Beyond terrafying. She never wanted to feel that kind of pain again. Ever._

_"I am not going to be afraid to use this. It's an option now. I'd be careful about disobeying me if I were you. I was gentle this time, it was your first. I won't be so kind next time. Alright go. You've had enough for the day. Get out of my sight."_

_Alice walked away and curled up in the corner of the tower. She cried herself to sleep wondering about what it'd take to get mother to choose that particular punishment. And tried to think of how she could avoid it._

_And that was the last time she'd tried to get mother to run around with her. The last time she dared run in front of her at all. It had been an effective punishment in mother's eyes. One she'd resorted to more and more often over time. But one that Alice had slowly learned how to take without making any sound. The quieter she was during it, the shorter it was. But it always hurt and she'd quickly become terrafied of it as a possibility. And mother didn't even have to actually use it in order to make Alice stop what she was doing. Sometimes she'd just pick it up and shake it and Alice would immediatly stop what she was doing, sit down and mutter a strand of apologies, sometimes they'd get her out of it and others they only angered mother more._

* * *

Zelena grabbed the leash.

Alice blinked and flinched. What had she done wrong? She'd been sitting and drawing which Zelena had said was okay. She'd been asked if she wanted to go outside with Luna. Okay. She'd followed Zelena at a safe distance. She hadn't said anything. Alice didn't know what she'd done wrong. What had she done? Alice sat down, too quickly for her.

"Sorry."

Zelena turned around, still holding the leash. Alice had seemed ready to go outside. What was wrong?

"Okay, we don't have to go if you don't want to?" Alice nodded her head. What did Zelena want her to do? She stared at the piece of leather and tried to think of how Zelena would want it done. Mother had always made her stand when she hit her. Alice wasn't sure she could handle it after months of not feeling almost any pain. Zelena hadn't hurt her when she ran, or when she told her her wrist hurt. Alice didn't understand what Zelena could possibly be ready to punish her for.

"Can't." Alice whispered. She knew it might only anger Zelena more but she needed there to be a reason for this. She needed to know why it was happening so she could think about that instead of how much it hurt.

Zelena wasn't sure what was wrong. Alice had gone from being ready to go to sitting with her knees up to her chest and whispering that she couldn't do something. Did she think she wasn't allowed outside?

"Yes, you can." Alice held in a sigh. Okay, so was that permission to stand up? Alice took it that way and stood up, turning her back towards Zelena. She looked at the nearest wall and focused her attention there. Alice wasn't ready but knew it wasn't her decision when this started. Alice closed her eyes tight and started counting in her head. It was a distraction whenever mother had hit her that had managed to make it hurt just a little less. And if she was thinking hard enough she wouldn't scream. At least she hoped she wouldn't.

Now Zelena was confused. Alice stood there waiting. When nothing happened she warily sat back down. "Sorrynotreadysorry." Zelena hadn't wanted her to stand yet, had she? Alice burried her face into her knees which she'd again pulled up to her chest.

Zelena blinked. Not ready for what? What was going on in Alice's mind? Zelena paused. Alice had been fine right until when? Zelena thought. The moment she grabbed the leash was when Alice had stopped what she was doing and sat on the floor. But that didn't make sense, Alice had used the other leash at least a dozen times . She'd watched Zelena use it even more. It had never seemed to scare her.

"I don't know what's scaring you. I'm sorry if I scared you. Can you please tell me what's wrong?"

"Idon'tknowwhatIdidwrong."

Zelena sighed. Nothing. Zelena was willing to bet Alice had never managed to do anything actually wrong in her life. It was clear her so-called mother had all but beat that out of her before it could even start. Wait...had she?

"You didn't do anything wrong." Alice's face was still burried in her knees. Zelena needed her to look at her for just a second.

"Alice please look at me." Alice looked up and met Zelena's eyes for a second then darted her focus to the leash. It was scary and Zelena was going to hit her with it and she was sure it would hurt more now that she'd avoided it for months. "Does this remind you of something?" Zelena asked pointed to the leash. Zelena watched with concern as Alice nodded.

"Can you tell me what?" Allice nodded again.

Alice nodded. Mother had always just called it the strap. Alice never cared what it was called."Thestrap."

Zelena hoped this wasn't what she thought. "What do you think it's for?"

Alice didn't like where this was going. Mother had always started this kind of thing with questions. They were usually traps to get Alice to either break a rule to justify doing it more or a trap to get Alice distracted so she'd scream after the first few strikes. But ignoring a direct question wasn't helping her case.

"Idobadthing. Ithurts. Iscreamittakeslonger. Hurtsmore. Imakenosoundwhileithappens." Alice was terrafied but she didn't know what Zelena's rules were. Did she want her quiet? Or not? Did she want her to apologize during it or after?

Bloody hell where was Robin? She had an easier time deciphering Alice's panicked way of speaking. Zelena could never quite tell where one word ended and another began. She wasn't sure Alice knew either.

"I will be right back."

Alice held in a groan. Mother had said that the first time she'd done this and she'd brought something back that hurt so much more than any pain she'd ever been through before. Was Zelena finding something even worse for her? Alice curled into herself. She wouldn't be able to take it like she could before leaving mother. She should have stayed there, at least there she'd known what mother expected. She wasn't ready for this . Alice was terrafied. Luna came over and tried to comfort her. Alice was shaking and nothing Luna did was bringing her out of her blind panic.

Zelena returned with Robin. "Okay, can you tell Robin what you think the leash is for?" Alice nodded.

"Punishment. IfIdidbadthing. Ithurts. .IfIscreamorcryorwhimperit'llhurtmore."

Robin blinked. She'd understood every word Alice had said. And she had a new place for her retired efforts at bringing down Nottingham to go. "Mom, I need to talk to you outside."

They both walked out the front door.

"She thinks you're going to beat her with that. And apparently her mother did that enough that she has rules in her head for how she should just take it. She wasn't allowed to scream and if she did it sounds like her mother made it even worse."

"That vile woman!" Zelena let out a strand of curse words. "No wonder she's so bloody terrafied!"

"Mom, I agree with you but you can't help Alice if you're yelling. You'll only make her believe that you'll hurt her just like her mother did."

"Do we have to bloody call her that?"

"I know. But you need to go back in there calm."

Zelena let out a few breaths and then walked back inside and crouched down to Alice's level.

"Okay, I'm not going to beat you. Promise. Here... you hold it. Can't hurt you then, can it?"

Zelena tried to hand Alice the leash. Alice didnt want to touch it. Mother didn't let her touch it. That was bad. Alice panicked. "No." It was bad to touch it. That wouldn't end well for her. But then she realized she'd told Zelena no.

* * *

_Alice hated the strap mother hit her with. It hurt and it was scary and it was getting dirty. Mother never cleaned anything. Alice had been told to clean mother's room. Which she was doing after mother had hit her for trying to ask for the bathroom. Alice was relieved mother hadn't been angry enough to do more than hit her with her hand and yell. But she was still terrafied about when she got back if she did anything wrong. She'd still let her go but words were bad and mother had said she needed the reminder that she wasn't supposed to ask questions. And Alice had bothered her at the wrong time. It had been years since the first time mother decided to use the strap instead of her hand. It got dirty sometimes but Alice had never cleaned it. Now it looked awful, the evildence of the luckily only occasional too long punishments that drew blood from Alice's scarred and bruised back stained the leather. And Alice was supposed to be cleaning everything in the room. Mother had said so. She'd even said to use the sink if she needed to. _

_Alice pulled the terrafying object off its hook and started to wash it in the sink. _

_Mother walked in as she was scrubbing it. _

_"What are you doing?"_

_"Cleaning."_

_Mother had glanced over to the now empty hook. _

_"Where is the strap I use when you need to be punished?" Mother had seemed so angry._

_"Here." Alice shook it in the water. _

_"And you are touching it because?" _

_Alice didn't respond. It would only anger her further. "I think I'll let you finish cleaning it first, but when you do go stand in your place. You know how. Unless you don't to know how to do even that properly. You only have to clean where I tell you and yet you mess that up constantly. You and your mistakes. Should really work on those. You make a mistake and I have to punish you and you know, I'd think you'd want that to stop. I know they hurt. I've heard you're pathetic whimpering."_

_Alice nodded and quickly finished cleaning it. She didn't want to make mother wait. She handed it to her and turned her back towards her. She was used to this now. _

_"You are never to touch this! The only time you should be anywhere near it is if I'm punishing you!" Mother had made that lesson clear but Alice hadn't been bleeding. "Go put it away."_

_Alice had blinked. There was no way she avoided pain. Either she did as she was told and broke the rule she had just been beaten for breaking or she ignored a direct order. She'd sat down and pulled her knees to her chest. _

_"Pathetic. Coward scared of your own mother. Get up." Alice blinked, she was in pain already. Was mother going to do it again already? Alice had spent a second too long thinking. Mother had grabbed her and made her stand. "Turn around." Alice did as she was told, even though she was terrafied. "I. Told. You. To. Get. Up." Mother had punctuated every word with strike from the leather strap. Alice had let out a whimper. "No! No sound!" Alice held in the next whimper she had and shook as mother had struck her until she had started to bleed. Mother always stopped once that happened. Said the tower wouldn't let her kill her. She usually yelled for a while after, still holding the scary piece of leather and waving it around as she yelled. Alice had always feared it enough that she didn't even need to move it around to make Alice terrafied of ever doing what mother had been yelling about again. But she never managed to completly avoid it, no matter how hard she had tried. The freshly cleaned piece of leather was bloodstained again. "There. Did you learn your lesson?"_

_Alice nodded. She'd learned that sometimes there was nothing she could do to avoid pain. She'd learned that sometimes mother was just going to be so angry that she could only hope that she didn't let even the slighest of whimpers escape. "What was that lesson?"_

_"Notouchthestrap."_

_"Yes. And?"_

_"Listen."_

_"Exactly. Surely you won't repeat those mistakes now will you?"_

_"No mother."_

_"Well, just to be sure." Alice had held in a sigh. She couldn't take it any more. Please no. "Oh calm down, I'm not going to beat you again right now. I have my own things to do, you know. Can't stand here all day. And you're bleeding. And as much of a pain you are, you have to be alive in order for me to still have my freedom. And I do so love the market. But go clean the kitchen. When you're done go to bed." Alice didn't know what love was but knew mther activley went to the market weekly and often hit her when she got back._

_Alice had done what she was told, holding back the tears as she pulled her injured back around, stretching fresh wounds. Alice finished cleaning the kitchen and started to walk to her little corner. Mother never came back there. It was one of the few places in the tower where she'd never had to feel the pain of an active hit or other punishment. But her back was marred with the remnants of the latest beating. She laid on her stomach so the blankets wouldn't press against any of the open wounds and cried herself to sleep._

* * *

Alice panicked. She'd said no. She wasn't allowed to tell Zelena no. Not out loud.

"Sorrysorrysorry."

"Alice, it's okay." Zelena was begging Alice to calm down. It was okay to not want to do something. "You're allowed to tell me no. I'm not going to make you do anything you don't want to do. But this really is just a leash for Luna. I'm not going to hit you with it. I'm not going to hit you at all."

Alice didn't believe her but didn't argue. It didn't look like a leash. It was thicker and a different material. "Speaking of Luna we should probably take her outside?"

Zelena called Luna and hooked the leash to her collar. She tried to hand it to Alice who again refused to touch it. Zelena sighed. "That's fine. You don't have to." They both went outside with Luna but Alice kept an even greater distance from Zelena than usual. Zelena wondered how she'd get Alice to use this leash. She seemed scared of touching it for some reason.

"Alice, why won't you touch the leash?"

"Notallowed."

Zelena sighed."Why not?"

Direct question. "onlytotouchifpunished."

"Alice, this isn't for hitting you. It's so Luna has a leash that won't get dirty as quickly."

Alice shook her head. "Onlytouchifpunished."

Zelena sighed. Alice was just repeating herself. "I understand that, Alice." Zelena was hiding her exasperation and anger behind a gentle smile, one she hoped was comforting in some way. "But, I am not going to beat you."

Alice nodded. Zelena wasn't going to beat her right then. Mother had tried that one a few times. Zelena still saw the fear apparent in Alice's eyes. "Alice, I don't mean just not right now. I don't mean just not today. I don't mean just not with this. I don't mean anything other than I am not going to beat you ever with anything. So here."

Zelena tried to hand Luna's leash to Alice again who started to shake her head violentlly.

"Ok, ok. Don't have to. I understand it's scary." Zelena stepped back a little. "Do you want to go inside or stay out here?"

"Inside."

"Alright, good job telling me what you want. Really good."

Alice was still shaking when they went inside. Zelena decided the leather leash was going to be completly useless. "Look, throwing it away. It can't be a problem if it's not here, yeah?" Zelena threw the leash away and decided she'd go get a few dozen rope and cloth ones when she had a chance. The rope leash hadn't scared Alice and she didn't think a cloth one would but it was better to know she had ones that Alice thought were safe than to only have a kind Alice thought was meant to be used to hurt her.

When Alice retreated to her room after a little prompt of where she wanted to go Zelena sat down in one of the chairs in the kitchen and rubbed her temples. She'd know Alice's so-called mother had been a monster. But she'd gone further than Zelena had even thought about being a possibility. She felt guilty for not getting her out the moment Robin told her about her. How many more beatings had Alice had to endure because Zelena had joked about chores not being a big deal? How many rules had Alice caved to after enough pain because Zelena had thought Robin couldn't be serious about the extent of it? Zelena sighed, the guilt she didn't deserve eating at her. She hadn't hit her but she hadn't helped soon enough and Alice had suffered even more than Zelena thought she had because of it. Zelena sat with her guilt and prayed to the gods she hadn't ruined Alice's chances at being independant by buying that leash.


	20. Breaking

Alice ran through the rules she'd managed to break since moving in with Robin and Zelena. It bothered her but she didn't know how to explain what was wrong. She kept trying to follow the rules she knew but Zelena told her to do things that went against those. She'd done every single thing that mother would have been beyond angry about and then she'd felt so awful about it. And she'd apologized. But eventually she would do them anyway and cry herself to sleep begging the world to make sense again. And she didn't know what Zelena really wanted. None of it had been what she'd expected. None of her reactions made sense to Alice and Alice didn't know what to do. She'd learned to ask for things but that was the most she'd do on her own. She'd ask Luna if she was closer but still preferred Zelena. And she'd listen to Robin occasionally.

Alice had begun to worry more about how Zelena would react to her doing anything wrong. She kept telling her she wouldn't hurt her but Alice didn't know how long that would last. And she didn't know what Zelena expected of her. Every rule mother had, Zelena didn't punish her for breaking. Alice had tried a lot to see if Zelena had any rules that would matter enough. Did Zelena care what she did at all? Mother had made it clear she didn't want or care about Alice but she'd never managed to ignore her compleltly. She did care what Alice was doing enough to hurt her for it. Alice just wanted things to make sense again. She just wanted to know what it'd take to anger Zelena. She'd try to avoid doing it once she knew. But she needed to know.

Alice was sitting at the table drawing when Zelena glanced over her shoulder. "That looks pretty. Good job drawing."

Alice flinched but nodded at Zelena, acknowledging that she heard her and was listening. Alice saw a few dishes in the sink and some on the counter and she didn't like them being there. Things were supposed to stay clean. It was Alice's job to make sure they did.

"Canicleanthekitchen?" Luna nodded but Alice stared at Zelena. If she was around she wanted her permission too. Zelena wished Alice would stop relying on anyone for permission but knew she needed to encourage any amount of indepedance Alice showed.

"It looks like Luna said you can." Alice took that as Zelena saying she could and stood up, slowly walking by Zelena who had already sat down to eat her breakfast.

Alice started washing the dishes. When she was almost finished her arm brushed against one of the plates on the counter sending it plummetting towards it's early demise. Alice flinched and immediatly sat down next to the now shattered plate. "Sorrysorrysorry." Alice's apologies masked both her fear of pain and her desire to know Zelena actually cared when she did something bad. She was supposed to hurt her. And she wouldn't. Why wouldn't she?

"Alice, it's okay. Plates break sometimes."

Zelena got up and swept the shattered glass into a dustpan and threw it away. "See? No big deal."

Alice nodded and stood back up. It was okay. It wasn't a big deal. Nothing she did here mattered. Zelena was never going to care what she did. Alice didn't understand. Mother had told her she was a pain to have around but she had had to keep her. Zelena didn't have to so why wasn't she ever punishing her? At this point Alice wanted to hear Zelena yell. Would she if she broke a plate on purpose?

Alice stood back up and stared at Zelena, waiting for her to look at her again. She pushed another plate off the counter.

Zelena watched as Alice stood up and bumped into another plate. Alice sat down again but stared at Zelena. Was she angry? She'd done it on purpose that time.

Zelena saw Alice staring at her, her eyes wide but she hadn't completly curled into herself. That was better than her burrying her face and panicking. "Good."

Alice didn't know what Zelena thought was good. Alice was frustrated. Zelena hadn't gotten angry at an accident or when she did it on purpose. She just wanted her to yell or insult her or hit her. That made sense. What did she have to do that Zelena would even care about?

"CanIgotomyroom?" Alice was desperate for Zelena to hurt her or yell. Nothing was happening so she wanted to go hide in her room. Luna nodded and Alice listened to her, hoping that Zelena would notice she wasn't asking her. But Zelena ignored what Alice thought was bad.

A few hours later, after they'd eaten lunch Alice had gotten up to clean and pushed another plate off the counter. This time she tried to make it look more intentional. Alice immeidatly apologized for it. She wanted Zelena to yell but she didn't want to anger her any more than she had to.

"Alice, it's okay." Zelena told her then cleaned up the pieces. Alice had stared at her and knocked another one off. Zelena cleaned the pieces again. Alice sat down and apologized, silently begging Zelena to understand that it wasn't an accident but she couldn't get her to understand. "It's okay, Alice. You're not in trouble."

Alice was even more frustrated now. Mother wouldn't have let the first plate go. Let alone the next few. Alice just needed Zelena to yell even a little. Why didn't she care what she was doing? And Alice had no idea what Zelena expected of her. She hadn't even tried to give her any rules. She'd only told her it was okay to break the rules she knew. And it had been fine when there had still been rules. But now Alice had slowly broken every rule mother hd ever had, and Zelena had told her to break them. Alice had thought she was trying to make her break rules so she'd have a reason to punish her but that didnt seem to beanywhere close to what was happening. She'd waited for Zelena to be angry but she wouldn't. And Alice wasn't used to not having any rules.

Dinner rolled around and Alice had picked up a plate from the drainer while Zelena was cooking and set it on the counter and knocked it on the ground.

Zelena sighed. She couldn't show any kind of anger. She couldn't scold Alice. It'd destroy the small amount of confidence she was displaying, which Zelena thought was a bloody miracle. She was willing to sacrafice a few plates if it showed Alice she was safe but they still needed plates. And if this continued for much longer they wouldn't have any. Zelena briefly wished this realm had paper plates.

It had been a week and Alice's war on the dishes had only escalated. Zelena had almost gone back to Storybrooke to get some paper plates but realized that wouldn't complelty solve the problem. Why was Alice suddenly hellbent on breaking every dish she could get her hands on?

It had been fine when it was a few dishes but once it had become a few dishes a day it'd become a problem. Alice would wait until Zelena could see her and then she'd knock a dish off of the counter. And Zelena had no idea why. But she had to have some reason for it. Did Alice like the sound it made? Or was she trying to tell her something? Zelena's patience was growing thin. The suddenly frequent sound of shattering dishes had started to exhaust her. She just wanted Alice to tell her what was wrong. Zelena sighed as she heard another plate meet the floor and reminded herself that at least Alice was moving without asking first. Zelena didn't understand what Alice was trying to tell her.

Alice was more frustrated then she'd started. She'd tried breaking the plates in the most obvious ways possible and Zelena still acted like nothing had happened. She didn't even say anything about it sometimes! Did Zelena not care about what she was doing? Should she go home? Alice didn't know how to get home and knew if mother took her back in she'd beat her for running away and for breaking every rule and for going outside. Alice didn't want to deal with that level of pain but she did want Zelena to at least yell. Or tell her why she was keeping her, she didn't have to!

Zelena sighed. If Alice didn't stop breaking plates she was going to have to go get more which would involve leaving Alice at home, possibly alone. Which Zelena didn't trust much at all.

Alice pushed yet another dish onto the ground. Zelena had stopped reacting to it. She didn't know why Alice had suddenly decided every plate she could reach needed to be shattered into dozens of pieces but it was slowly eating at Zelena's patience. The sound had quickly gone from something that wouldn't bother her to something that she wanted to scream every time she heard but screaming would only destroy the amount of progress Alice had made. And she had been doing so well, up until she'd decided to break bloody near everything in the kitchen.

Zelena sighed as yet another innocent plate met its demise. She cleaned it up and silently begged for this sudden destructive phase to stop. Alice went about her day for a while.

"CanIcleanthekitchen?" Alice was sitting and calmly drawing, which was a much needed reprieve from her tiny outburst of destruction. Alice saw Zelena enter the kitchen and decided she needed her to be angry with her still.

Zelena sighed. Telling Alice no would only teach her that asking for things was still wrong and that was definitley not something Zelena could do right now. Alice clearly didn't have the words for something she was trying to tell her. But if she said yes then a few more plates would likely end up in the garbage. Zelena decided Alice's ability to get what she needed far outweighed the safety of a few dishes and told Alice she could.

Alice stared at Zelena. She's broken so many plates and Zelena mostly ignored it. Or told her it was okay. How was this okay? Why didn't Zelena have any rules?

Alice reached for one of the glasses that had so far managed to escape her wrath and sent it plummeting to the ground.

Zelena sighed. The sound of shattering glass had quickly become a daily occurance. Zelena bit her tongue, she was getting tired of having to clean up broken glass.

Alice apologized and grabbed the broom to sweep it up.

"Okay, that's good. Thank-you for cleaning it up," Zelena acknowledged Alice's movement and then watched as Alice threw another glass onto the ground then cleaned that one too. Zelena sighed. There was only so much she could do. She didn't want this but she couldn't think of what Alice might be upset with. It honestly could be anything from not liking the color dishes Zelena had to being terrafied of something Zelena would have no way of knowing about.

Alice just wanted Zelena to yell. She wouldn't. Alice gave up and asked if she could go to bed.

"Yes, that's fine."

Zelena checked the floor to make sure there wasn't any remnants of glass.

The next morning Alice woke up and pet Luna. "CanIgotothebathroom?"

Alice listened to Luna telling her she could and continued to ask the dog for permission.

Alice was scared but she was ready to try as hard as she could to anger Zelena.

"Good morning, Alice."

"CanIhelpyoucook?" Zelena sighed. A few more dishes were going to meet their demise whether Zelena wanted them to or not.

"Yeah. What are we making?" Zelena joked, begging for this to mean that Alice was over breaking everything she could reach in the kitchen.

Alice shook her head. She didn't know. How was she supposed to answer Zelena? Alice started to pull her legs up to her chest, ready for Zelena to yell or hurt her.

"You don't have to answer." Alice blinked. Did Zelena not have any rule Alice could break?

As they were cooking Alice knocked a dish off the counter.

Zelena sighed. They were starting to run out of plates. But yelling would only make it worse.

"Are you trying to tell me something?"

Alice nodded. Yes! She was supposed to yell. Why didn't Zelena get it?

"Ok, do you want to tell me?"

Alice shook her head. "That's okay, you don't have to." Zelena really wanted an answer but she wasn't going to force Alice to tell her. It would have been great if Alice's sudden ability to be a little more defiant hadn't come with a side of plate massacre. Alice knocked another plate down. Why didn't that anger Zelena? She was refusing to answer her!

Henry and Ella walked up to Zelena's porch. "But yeah basically my aunt took in this girl whose mother was awful. She thinks she has to ask to do anything. She spends most of her time hiding in the corner of the living room. She's kinda obsessed with the bathroom door for some reason. And pretty sure if you look at her wrong she gets super frightened. She doesn't talk a lot, though. And if she ask you anything just you have to respond. My aunts trying to get her out of the habit of thinking it's not okay to talk to anyone. And no matter what, don't tell her no. Although she hasn't really done anything wrong."

Henry quickly learned he'd spoken far too soon.

"Okay, I'm not going to force you. Henry and Ella are coming over for breakfast they should be here soon." Just then Henry and Ella walked into the kitchen, right as Alice was tossing another glass onto the floor.

"We're here now."

Alice glanced over towards Henry and Ella. Alice sat down and pulled her legs up to her chest. "Sorrysorrysorry."

"Alice, it's okay. It's just Henry and his wife, Ella. They're not going to hurt you. Promise."

Alice nodded. Was Zelena sure? Alice needed someone to make some kind of rule and she couldn't get it from Zelena. Alice stood up and stared at Ella. reached over and knocked another few plates off the counter. "Sorry." Alice tried to explain that this was on purpose. Alice didn't say anything. She was too scared to break too many rules at once. Zelena wasn't getting it. She didn't know how else to tell her what she wanted. Why wouldn't Zelena just yell? Why weren't there any rules?

Zelena sighed, overly used to this by now. She started to clean up the mess. That was wrong! "Idothat." Alice's voice was a whisper but Zelene alet Alice finish cleaning.

Alice was frustrated and now she was even more frightened. There weren't any rules and no one seemed to care what she did. What would set Zelena off? Alice was frightened, if there weren't any rules she couldn't avoid being hurt. She knew that breaking things always angered mother and Zelena hadn't said anything about that! She just wanted to know what it'd take to anger Zelena. If she knew she could avoid it but if she didn't she couldn't.

"CanIgotomyroom?"

"Yes, that's fine. Come back when you're ready to eat, please?"

Alice nooded and retreated to her room.

Zelena sat down and rubbed her temples. "If you use a plate, put it away. Alice has declared a war on every dish in this house and she is winning. And I don't know what she's trying to prove. I know she's trying to tell me something but I don't know what it is. I asked her and she wouldn't tell me. Which I mean, she's finally gotten enough confidence to tell me no and completly ignore me which is better than her getting stuck in the middle of the road because I asked her to wait for me if she got lost but bloody hell am I tired of the sound of things breaking."

"Aunt Z, you sound exhausted."

"Like I said. Holy war on the bloody dishes. And I really don't want to tell her no."

"Rest a minute, I'll clean the kitchen."

"Could you?" Zelena sighed and laid her head on table. Which only lasted a few minutes. She was exhausted but couldn't take a break for long.

Alice returned to the kitchen when Henry was cleaning. That was wrong! She was supposed to do that! No! Zelena was going to be angry. Wait. Yes. Finally!

Alice glanced over at Zelena and apologized.

"You already apologized for whatever you broke last, it's fine." Zelena didn't love telling Alice it was fine to break things but she wasn't sure what else to do. She couldn't think of how to see what Alice was telling her she needed. This was entirely Alice's "mother's" fault, Zelena was sure.

Alice blinked. Still nothing? Fine! Alice looked at the drainer. She walked over to it and saw all the dishes Henry hadn't put away yet. Alice picked one up and tossed it to the floor. It shattered and Zelena didn't say anything. She picked up another and threw it to the ground. Nothing. Alice repeated this over and over again.

"Alice, you need to stop," Henry told her. He was calm. That wasn't right! Zelena wouldn't yell. No matter what she did. Alice was still scared. She knew the angrier she made her the worse it would be but she couldn't take it any more. Alice kept grabbing dishes and causing them to shatter. She could apologize later. She could try to handle whatever punishment Zelena would have for her. She hoped it wouldn't hurt too much.

"Alice, seriously you need to stop."

Zelena watched as the normally calm and silent Alice proceeded through a suprisngly violent outburst. She thought a moment. When had Alice ever listened to Henry?

"Alice, honey. I know you're frustrated. And you probably don't have the words for why. And maybe you're a little scared but you need to stop throwing things. Can you please do that? Can you please stop throwing things?"

Alice stared at her. That wasn't right! Why didn't Zelena ever yell? She had to! That made sense!

Alice kept throwing things as Zelena tried to calm her down, gently speaking to her. Asking her if she'd stop. Zelena sighed. This was not going well. Alice kept throwing very breakable things at the floor. This was the same girl who refused to even ask to go to the bathroom half the time. What was going on?

Alice threw another dish. She glanced over and there was none left in the drainer. She reached over and grabbed the spoon from the stove and tossed it down. It didn't break. Alice tried to pick up the pan.

Okay, that wasn't safe. Zelena panicked, not sure if Alice knew that that was dangerous. "Alice, no."

Alice stared at her. Why wasn't she yelling? Alice reached for the pot again. Zelena watched with horror as Alice tried to pick up a pot filled with boiling water. "Alice, No! Stop it!" Zelena sighed. She'd just yelled at Alice who stopped what she was doing immeidiatly. She'd been trying to protect her but now she had to find a way to explain to Alice that she wouldn't hurt her. She hoped she hadn't destroyed all of Alice's confidence.

Alice sat down. That's all she'd wanted. She'd just wanted Zelena to yell. Alice pulled her knees up to her chest. She was scared now. What would Zelena do? How badly would it hurt?

Zelena came and sat down next to her, watching as she the fear showed in her mannerisms. "I'm sorry I yelled. I just didn't want you to get hurt."

Why didn't Zelena have any rules? Alice hugged her legs tighter to her chest. There was nothing left that she could break. She could send the pot onto the ground but she didn't think Zelena would ever stop punishing her for that. Alice started to shake. She'd gone too far. She'd just wantd Zelena to yell. But now she was going to be even more angry than mother had ever been.

"Sorrysorrysorry." Alice tried to hug her legs tighter to her chest, but couldn't. She was silently begging Zelena not to hurt her. Alice didn't think actually asking her would help any.

"I'm sorry I yelled. I shouldn't have yelled at you. I know you're trying to tell me something. It's my fault I don't understand, that's not on you and I shouldn't have yelled at you."

"Badthing."

"Yes, yelling is a bad thing."

No! Why didn't Zelena understand her? Alice shook her head. She'd done something wrong and now Zelena was going to hurt her and Alice's breathing sped up more. "Badthing."

"I know. Yelling is a bad thing."

"Badthing."

"Yes, I know. I'm sorry I yelled. That was wrong. I was just trying to make sure you didn't get hurt." Alice shook her head. Zelena almost understood. If she hadn't stopped Zelena would have hurt her more. That's how it worked. She had to listen or she'd hurt her.

Alice was scared and she was blaming herself. Zelena watched as Alice sat hugging her knees. Zelena was sure she might be crying.

"Alice, you're not in trouble if that's what's bothering you."

Zelena didn't understand! Alice lifted her head up and threw one of her blankets. It was folded and made the slightest of thuds. Zelena sighed.

"Alice, come on" Henry spoke up from where he'd been sitting trying to avoid stepping in the sea of glass Alice had created. "You can use your words."

Alice burried her face back into her knees. "Idon'tknowwhattodo. IthurtsifIdon't."

"No, I'm not going to hurt you. No matter what you do."

"Therearen' 'truleshowdoIknowwhenyou'regoingtohurtmeandwhenyouwon't?"

Zelena sighed. She couldn't always understand what Alice wss saying.

"Okay, Alice. I can't understand you. I'm going to go get Robin. I'll be right back, okay?"

"Okay." Alice held in a groan. She'd made Zelena too angry. It was going to hurt a lot. She'd never do whatever Zelena said was the problem again, though. Alice sighed then flinched at the sound her voice made. She had never managed to avoid mother's punishments. She just couldn't stay still and quiet all the time. And she'd tried so hard but sometimes mother would tell her to do things she didn't actually want her to do. Or she'd hesitate a second too long. Alice let her silent tears fall, terrafied about when Zelena came back.

Zelena and Robin came into the kitchen. "Hey, Alice, can you tell Robin what's wrong?"

"Therearen'trules. Idon'tknowwhattodo." Alice hated telling Zelena how she felt but she'd already angered her enough for one day.

"Alice says there aren't any rules and she doesn't know what to do."

"Whatever you want to, I won't get mad."

Zelena still didn't get it! She was supposed to be mad. Alice picked up another blanket.

"Alice, you don't have to throw that. We can talk about what's wrong." Alice set the blanket back down. She didn't want to talk but hoped she could explain.

"Idon' .Soiknowwhattothinkaboutwhenbeingpunished."

"Okay, none of us are ever going to hurt you, but I know that's confusing for you right now. We can find some rules. Mom, Alice needs rules."

"Okay, don't break the plates. Be back by dark. That enough rules?"

Alice didn't think that was enough but could live with it. Alice didn't want to ask Zelena how she would punish her. But she knew she'd done something wrong. She stood up and turned around to face the nearest wall.

"What? What are you doing?"

" .Sorry."

Zelena sighed. She almost wished she knew how to find Alice's so called mother. She deserved to feel every ounce of fear she'd forced Alice to have.

"Absolutley not. I don't hurt children," Zelena let the fact her once sworn enemy was a teenage girl remain out of the conversation. "I'm not going to hurt you. No matter what you do."

Alice didn't understand. She'd broken things and ignored what Zelena asked her to do. "youneedtocare."

Zelena saw red. Alice thought that was what it meant to care? "I do care. I can't show it that way. We'll work on it okay? You can help me clean up this mess then we can play a game. Okay?"

Alice agreed and hoped she wouldn't anger Zelena. She wasn't going to hurt her. Alice hoped that would last.

They finished cleaning up the glass then Ella, Henry, and Robin joined them for a midday game night.


	21. Chapter 21

Alice had stopped destroying things after Zelena had talked to her during her war on the dishes and had returned to her usual level of fearful calm. She was still easily frightened and watched Zelena every time she came close to her. She'd spent a few days scared of going into the kitchen but after enough offers of spaghetti and cake she had been lured into sitting in the room again, but still tried to avoid it when she could.

Alice sat coloring as she clutched her toy rabbit against her body with her free hand. Regina was visiting again and Alice couldn't stand being around her. Zelena knew this and saw an opppurtunity for Alice to have a little more independance.

"Alice, do you want to keep drawing or do you want to go outside for a little bit?" Zelena wanted Alice to be able to do more without her help. As it stood she couldn't leave the property without it causing problems. She simply didn't know how to handle things and other people didn't understand that. Zelena still occasionally scolded herself for taking Alice to the market far before she had truly been ready. She wanted to be able to try it agian but worried for Alice's safety. Zelena both feared she was being too cautious and not cautious enough.

Alice glanced up from her drawing for a moment and then looked back down and whispered "Outside."

"Okay." Zelena paused for a moment she didn't mind going outside with her but she needed to become more independent. And Zelena really didn't think she'd go very far. Would it be okay for her to explore by herself? Zelena decided she'd go outside with Alice at first.

They got Luna and went outside.

Alice immediatly went to sit in the grass. Outside didn't have as many rules and Zelena never said anythign to her when she did this.

Zelena watched her for a minute and hoped Alice would move more but she didn't.

"Alice?"

Alice glanced over to her. "Do you want to sit there or do you want to go take Luna for a walk?" Zelena was hoping she could find some way to get Alice to make her own choices. She hoped this would work.

Alice stared at her. She'd walk Luna if Zelena said she could. "Walk."

"Alright, go ahead. I'm gonna go inside for a little bit. Don't go too far, okay?"

Alice nodded. Zelena went inside.

Alice didn't know how too far was so she only moved a little. Then pet Luna and talked to her about how much she missed having rules that made sense to her

Zelena glanced out the window frquently while her and Regina talked.. Alice couldn't see her but Zelena could still make sure she was safe.

"I don't know what to do. Everytime we get a little further something else scares her. And she's still terrafied of you simply from you asking her to eat in the kitchen. She spent a few days recently scared to eat in the kitchen at all. I'm just worried."

"Stop worrying so much, Zelena. She'll be fine. Just let her go at her own pace. She'll get there."

"Where will she get, Regina? Will she ever be able to so much as go out anywhere? The last time we tried that she almost got hit by carriage for gods' sakes!"

"I know,Z. One step at a time. Get her to initte doing things herself here first then worry about how you'll make sure she's safe if she ever goes anywhere." Regina was being comforting to her sister but didn't know if Alice would ever be able to fufill her own basic needs without external guidance.

"Not sure she'll ever do so much as use the bathroom without asking someone first." Zelena sighed and continued watching as Alice sat on the ground not moving yet.

"Howfaristoofar?" Alice whispered to Luna.

Luna didn't answer her. Alice stood up. Zelena had said she could walk. Alice started walking in circles. She wasn't going far at all. She covered this amount of space when cleaning the kitchen. It was fine.

Zelena sighed. Alice was just walking in circles. The same circle over and over again. Alice didn't know how far she could go, did she?

Zelena walked outside.

Alice sat down. "Sorry. Toofar." Alice eyes conveyed their usual panic and Zelena held in a strand of curse words that would put the rebellion's resident pirate to shame. But the words had been spaced out a little more than usual. They stistill blurred together but it was better than Alice's usual speech pattern.

"No, not too far. You're fine. Did you want to go further or did you not want to?"

Alice wanted to walk a little more. She nodded. How far was she allowed to go though?

"Howfar?" Alice flinched as she spoke. She didn't like asking Zelena questions. She tried to avoid it. "Sorry."

"It's okay," Zelena didn't bother trying to decipher what the apology was for. At this point she was convinced sometimes Alice didn't know what she was apologizing for either.

"Hmmm, you're taking Luna with you. Go as far as you want to as long as you can still see the house. And try to be home by dark."

Alice flinched a little, which Zelena didn't take too much note of. Alice shook a little as her thoughts started to race. When would it get dark? How would she know how to get where she was going? Why did she have to go home to mother?

Alice stood up and started walking away from Zelena who went inside soon after.

Alice kept walking. "Mother's angry" Alice panickly chattered at Luna, most of her words slurring together even worse than normal. She couldn't think straight. She darted her vision all around her. She took a guess at the direction she thought led to her stone home. "Thatway? No!" Alice's vision was so clouded with her tears. She slouched down onto the ground and pressed her back against a nearby tree. Alice could nearly already feel the pain her mother would inflict the moment she renetered the tower. She could hear all the insults she'd hurled at her over the ears ringing in her mind. She could hear her younger self silently begging for the pain to stop. She could hear mother telling her she wasn't allowed to cry. The tears flowed down her face anyway. She didn't want to go there. She'd missed home but she was scared now. For most of her life all she'd know was pain, it'd been different when it had been the only thing she'd ever known. Now she couldn't imagine not having Robin's games or Henry showing her how to draw different things or Zelena letting her help cook. She was going to miss Zelena trying to comfort her when she was hurt or scared. Usually the latter. . She was going to miss everyone actually giving her a chance to speak. She'd never be able to do the things she could with them again once she went home. And would Robin still visit? Alice wanted her to. She couldn't go back to only having mother. Robin had made the pain just a little more bearable.

Mother would never let her keep Luna and even if she did she'd never let Alice listen to Luna. Alice closed her eyes tight and reached over to pet Luna. Alice would have to go back to only moving when told to. She'd finally have the rules she so desperatly wanted but she'd miss being able to just go to the bathroom when she wanted to. Mother would forget Alice had needs. And Alice had no intentions of asking her for anything ever again. She'd been scared of her before but now Alice didn't know if she could live the way she had again.

Alice was terrafied but she didn't know how to ignore Zelena's order.

"DoIhavetogohome?" Alice asked Luna, who didn't respond. Alice stood back up and kept walking, muttering her frustrations the entire time.

Zelena started to set the table. It was getting close to dark but Zelena didn't doubt Alice would be back at the exact moment it got dark. She took insturctions too litterally and followed them to the letter. She wouldn't worry.

Alice sighed. She was exhausted. And she was lost. "Whereami?" Luna didn't know either. Alice slumped onto the ground again. She was never making it home on time. Alice sighed at least Zelena was the one who had given the direction. Her punishments were rare enough that none had ever happened, mother's however were frequent enough Alice could feel lingering pains on her skin whenever something reminded her of them or she shifted her body the wrong way.

"Ican'tfindhome. I'mscared" Alice let her tears fall and pulls her legs up to her chest, which Luna immediatley intercepted. Alice fell asleep petting Luna.

Zelena's worry had risen along with the night sky. She hadn't seen Alice for a while. She'd told her how far it was safe to go and when to be back. And she wasn't back. Zelena regretted not going with her. But she'd seemed fine!

She should've been back by now. She couldn't have gotten that far. She wouldn't have left the view of the house. But Zelena couldn't think of where she would have gone. Where was Alice?

**A/N: this is a 2 part chapter I believe. bc i'm ina mood to be sligtly evil and leave a bit of a cliffhanger.**


	22. Lost

Alice kept her back pressed against the tree for awhile. She was scared. She didn't know how to do what Zelena had asked her. And it was getting dark. She'd never been outside in the dark before. Things she'd only heard faint whispers of outside of her tower were now even louder. And she could feel her need for one of her blankets growing. She didn't like the color the sky had turned. She couldn't see through it. And she used her eyes to see what danger was around her. She couldn't brace herself for pain if she couldn't even see it coming. Alice started to shake. She didn't like this. And she didn't know how to do what Zelena wanted her to do. Luna came and laid down in her lap, her normal way of calming Alice down providing a layer of warmth.

"Idon'twanttogohome," Alice told Luna. She was scared of how much pain she'd be met with. She was sure mother would need to punish her for months to make up for everything she'd done wrong. And those were only the things mother had a way of knowing about. Alice feared the consequences of the things she wouldn't know but she feared not telling mother the truth more. She'd have to admit to it. All of it. She wasn't sure which thing would anger mother the most. She realized she had _tried_ to anger Zelena on more than one occasion. Mother would be beyond furious. And she'd have to tell her that to. She'd know if she was hiding something. Alice shuddered. There was a reason she'd been so scared when Zelena was trying to help her with her wrist. "It'sgoingtobebad."

Luna stayed stretched out on top of Alice's legs, preventing her from panicking too much.

Alice fell alseep in front of the tree.

"This is all my fault! I should've gone with her. Should have sent someone with her. I thought she knew how to get back."

"Zelena."

"No, Regina! Do not tell me I'm wrong! She won't sleep in a bedroom because she's scared by how big it is! She must be terrafied right now! And I did that!"

"Mom, c'mon. You're trying. It's hard. And we'll find her. I'm sure she's found somewhere small enough to sit and she has Luna with her so she'll keep her calm for long enugh that we can find her. Now we'll all go outside and look. Henry has those walkie talkies of his so we can all split up and look."

They went outside and did exactly as Robin had suggested.

Alice woke up when it was still dark e any and glanced around her. She still wasn't any closer to where she was told to go. She stood up.

"Ihavetogohome." A few tears cascaded down Alice's cheek but she agressivly wiped them away with her arm. She couldn't walk into the tower with tear stains. Her mother was likely already deciding that the only time she'd be allowed to move ever again was while she beat her. Alice recalled the many times mother had threatened to restrain her and the few times she actually had. It was only ever when she hurt herself.

* * *

_Alice had met Robin that day. She'd done something wrong. She'd ran and she'd fallen and hurt herself. She decided she'd hide it. Just this once. She just didn't want mother to know. She'd broken a rule and mother cared more about the rules than she did about Alice._

_"Come put this stuff away." Alice had done as she was told. The slight shake of fear not arousing suspicion. _

_"You're pathetic. I know you have your uses. But seriously? Shaking whenever I come near you?" Mother had stepped closer and Alice had flinched. An action she did more often than she even realized. Mother had hit her. "Finish this and make the bed." _

_Alice had winced with every slight movement, slilently praying mother wouldn't notice. She'd done something wrong. As she was making the bed her wrist hurt and she winced and then let out of a whimper of pain. _

_"Why do you sound like you're in pain? I haven't beaten you in days. I'm happy to change that if you've forgotten the lesson already. Do I need to?"_

_"No mother," Alice had choked out, desperatly wanting to grab her wrist and find a way to make it hurt less. "Come here, then."_

_Alice had done as she was told and approached mother, stopping a few feet away. "Your wrist. It's swollen. Care to tell me what happened."_

_Alice clenched her eyes shut tight. "I have ways to get the answer out of you, or you could just tell me."_

_" 'm sorry." Alice sandwhiched her rushed explanation in between apologies. _

_"You ran?"_

_"Iwon'tdoitagain," Alice promised, begging that this mistake would be the one that wouldn't be one mother chose to punish her for._

_"I'm sure you won't," Alice was relieved for a moment. "But, what are my rules about you doing bad things?"_

_" ." Mother had nodded. _

_"Yes. And this is a very bad thing. You're not so much as to move without my permission and you ran and tried to hide it. You understand that just one beating will never be enough, don't you." Alice held back tears. Even one always felt like more than enough pain to last a lifetime. _

_"I'msorry." Alice tried to plead but mother never listened._

_By the time mother had fnished yelling and beating her Alice was bleeding and she wasn't ready for what mother had said she would do. _

_"One isn't enough. But I can't kill you. So for at least the next few days things are going to be a little different."_

_The tone frightened Alice. "Follow me."_

_Alice did as she was told. She couldn't take any more pain. "Sit." _

_Alice sat down and glanced up at mother. What was she doing? Mother returned and threw something on the ground. Alice flinched. _

_"Since you can't seem to help yourself from moving around without permission, this should solve the problem. "Wrist. Now."_

_Alice handed her the noninjured wrist. "Nope. The one that's hurting you."_

_Alice delicatly outstretched her injured wrist. Mother had grabbed it roughly and hooked something around it. "This is a restraint. And Until you learn how to listen, you will stay attached to the wall unless it's for the several punishements you'll be getting over the next week or to use the bathroom. Are we clear?"_

_Alice had nodded. _

_Mother had finished setting the restraint up and Alice couldn't let tears fall as she'd set it up next to her own bed instead of in Alice's little corner. She'd not slept much at all that week. Mother had been completly serious about the restraint. And even more serious about how much she'd punish her. Alice had quit trying to run even without mother home after that. _

_Mother had decided that she'd learned her lesson and released her from the chains a mere day before Robin had returned to the tower._

* * *

Alice was sure that her life would be worse when she got home. Would mother even let her walk to the bathroom unsupervised anymore? Or would she have to sit and listen to all the reasons she deserved to be punished? Would she ever be allowed to stay in the tower without being restained again? It'd only happened a few times but it scared Alice. She couldn't get away from mother even while she slept when she was that angry. Why was Zelena making her do this? Why couldn't she stay where no one hurt her? Why couldn't she stay where she never had to feel the metal of the restraints mother used cutting into her wrist while she tried desperatley to apologize for something that had made mother that angry? Why did she have to go back there?

Alice started to cry again and sat down on the grass. "Nonononono," she told Luna. "Ithurts!" She was begging with the dog to find her a way out of doing this. She didn't want this. She knew she'd never be able to accept what mother did again. She wouldn't be able to handle it any more.

Alice sat in the place she'd found and cried for a while. At some point she started to feel a lot of pain. She really needed to pee but no one was around to tell her she could use the bathroom. And there wasn't any bathroom she could use nearby. She'd seen Luna go in the grass a number of times. Was that okay? She didn't know but she couldn't hold it anymore.

"Canigotothebathroom?" Alice asked Luna who told her it was okay. Alice tried and made a mess. But she no longer felt like her lower body was going to hurt her.

Alice adjusted slightly. She felt the tears slide down her cheeks more. It didn't hurt. She knew that once she got back any time she cried the tears would rub painfully against the brusies that would form. She couldn't go back to that. She had to but she couldn't face it. Mother couldn't punish her if she didn't go back. And if she ignored Zelena how would she know either. She wasn't going back!

"I'mnotgoinghome." She told herself.

What if Zelena found her? Alice started to practice telling her no. "No." the word felt strange but Alice hoped it'd work.

Everyone had been searching for a while. Zelena was still worrying and wrecked with guilt.

Finally, after what felt like forever, Zelena saw Luna laying next to Alice who was petting her. Zelena approached her.

"No."

Zelena blinked. Alice usually didn't know how to say no but she didn't know what was wrong.

"What?"

"No.I'mnotgoinghome."

"Alice, please?"

"No." Alice was terrafied but she wouldn't go back to that tower where mother only ever hurt her and gave her orders.

"Alice, why not?"

"WhydoIhaveto?"

"You can't live in the woods, Alice."

Alice shook her head. "Idon'twanttogohome."

"Ok, where do you want to go."

"Withyou."

Zelena relized her mistake. Alice thought the tower was home. No wonder she'd gotten so far away and not come back.

"I meant home as in my house. Not the tower."

Alice nodded.

Zelena got her back to the house and gave her food and drink and gave her unsoiled clothes to change into.

"Alice, this is your home. Not the tower. Here is where home is, okay?"

Alice nodded and everyone spent the rest of the day playing games.

It took a few more tries, with someone showing Alice where it was okay to go to, before Alice took Luna for walks by herself.


	23. Chapter 23

Zelena had slowly gotten over her shock at Alice telling her no. She'd struggled for so long saying she wanted to do things and she'd _finally_ managed to say she didn't want to do something. But it was starting to feel like she'd only do it if she was beyond terrafied. But it was still an accomplisment. It was some kind of progress when it had felt like Alice was only going to get worse before she got better.

Zelena set the food on the table and went to get Alice, still giving her aan option about where she ate. Really, Zelena would prefer if she ate in the kitchen but since there were only so many things she could use to give Alice a way to excercise the decison making skils she'd been deprived she'd let her eat wherever she damn well pleased.

Alice now knew Zelena wouldn't be angry if she told her no. She was still frightened. But Zelena had sworn she would never make her go back to the tower and Alice had started to believe what Zelena said. She didn't want to eat in her room or at the table.

"No." Zelena would have dropped anything she'd been holding had her hands not been empty. _Alice was saying no_ and it didn't seem like a response to fear.

"Ok, that's fine. You're allowed to tell me no. Where do you want to eat?"

Alice wanted to eat outside but didn't know if it was okay. What if Zelena _did_ get angry? She decided it couldn't be as bad as it would have if she asked mother. "Outside?"

Alice's voice was quiet but Zelena understood her. Alice had decided what she wanted wasn't the same as what she was offered and she'd asked for it! Of bloody course she could eat outside. "Sure, you can eat outside." Zelena didn't want to push too much further on the communication front, feaarful of losing Alice's willigness to do it so she offered her choices again "Do you want to go get your food or do you want me to?

"I." Alice's whisper was a little more confident than usual. She still stared at Zelena, worried more about getting up without asking.

Zelena wondered if the slight uptick in her confidence would affect her movement. Zelena walked away and waited for a moment. (_Come on_,) she silently begged. (_You can do this)_.

Alice waited for permission and got nothing. She didn't like it. She hadn't asked but Zelena had walked away. It'd be fine. It'd be fine. She got up and held onto her stuffed rabbit extra tightly. She walked out of her room and immediatly sat down. No. This was wrong. But Zelena wasn't in the same room any more she wouldn't see her. Would she? It was fine.

Zelena was in the kitchen where she could see Alice but Alice couldn't see her. She watched as Alice finally walked across the living room. It felt like watching a young child take their first steps. Zelena wanted to track down the girl's "mother" and skin her alive at this point. This teenager looked more terrafied walking across the living room than anyone had ever been of anything. Zelena watched as Alice stopped and either stood still or sat down after every few steps. Every step was shakier than the one before.

Alice stood back up and shakily took steps, pausing after every few wondering if she would anger Zelena doing this. It took her a little while but she made it into the kitchen where everyone was sitting at the table. She crumpled up on the floor and started spewing out indescernible apologies.

"Alice, it's okay. That's really good. I _want_ you to walk on your own," Zelena wasn't sure if trying to push her had been the right plan. She was already so scared, was she just adding more to the list of reasons Alice retreated into various corners of the house and refused to so much as look at anyone? "That was more than good. Great job."

Good? It was good? Alice almost understood. But it was so _different_. She'd always been told it was wrong. But why was it wrong for her but not for Robin? Or Zelena? Or Henry? Or even Robin? Was it okay?

"It'sokay," Alice whispered, repeating what Zelena had said.

"Yes."

Alice nodded. She had a few more steps she had to take to get her food but she made it. She picked up her food and glanced at Zelena.

"Canigooutsidenow?"

"Yeah, go ahead." Zelena wasn't going to make her go through the amount of effort it had clearly taken for her to get across the room without asking again right away.

Alice walked outside after grabbing Luna and sat down. Her squirell friend came to visit her.

"Shewas...wrong?" She asked the squirell. Had mother been wrong? Was it okay for her to do things without permission?

She finished her food and decided she'd try again. She still grabbed Luna's leash but this time didn't ask her.

They walked inside. She walked into the kitchen and put the plates in the sink. She didn't need anyone to tell her she could do it.

"I was_ " Henry cut himself off and just let her have the plate he was still using. His sandwhich had been in his hand and for once she was acting more confident than he'd ever seen her. Granted, she still flinched when he spoke and nearly dropped the plate when he had slightly adjusted so he could eat over the table better.

She finished cleaning the kitchen and sat down in the corner of it. How would Zelena know she hadn't asked? She'd have to tell her. Please don't be mad. Please don't be mad.

Zelena opened the door to look for Alice. Since when did she not ask to come inside?

Zelena found her in the kitchen.

"Hey."

Alice nodded.

"SorryIdidn'taskLuna."

"That's fine. You don't have to ask to come inside you live here. That's really good!" Zelena was so happy but kept her excitment quiet so she wouldn't startle Alice.

Alice wanted to use the bathroom and hadn't had a chance to ask that morning. Would Zelena be angry if she went without asking? She seemed happy she was doing things on her own. And she'd never heard her so much as yell at Robin for doing the same thing.

Alice stood up and walked away. Not saying anything to Zelena. Each step was still shaking and heart felt like it was beating so much faster but she was doing it. It would be fine. Wouldn't it? Alice hoped so. She made it to the bathroom, slowly. She had to stop every few steps to think if she really wanted to risk this.

Zelena blinked as Alice walked away. It took her a moment to fully process what that meant. Alice had walked away on her own more than once! She was _getting it_. Something Zelena had been trying to explain for months had finally clicked. Zelena didn't have to know what caused it. She was getting better. And she knew how to tell her no now too. It wasn't exactly teenage rebellion but it was close enough.


	24. Chapter 24

"That's good," Zelena offered praise as Alice stood up to grab her toy rabbit she'd dropped. Zelena had been potentially overdoing it with the praise lately but she was just so happy. Alice had _finally_ gotten to a point where she could do more than just sit and stare into space waiting for Zelena to tell her what to do. She'd started to go into the kitchen to draw on her own and her apologies were becomeing less frequent and when they did slip out they were far less panicked.

Zelena had no idea if Alice's newfound confidence would translate to any other enviorment but for right now it was good to not have to go tell her it was okay to come out of wherever she was curled up. It was wonderful to be able to almost trust that she didn't need the constant attention that she had for a while.

Alice continued drawing. It was a picture of her rabbit. Zelena usually wasn't around when she drew. She didn't know what Zelena did with the drawings once she was done. She finished the drawing and picked it up. She didn't want to keep it and she knew where she wanted to go was only a few steps away. She still flinched as she walked over toward the edge of the counter with her drawing in her hand.

She dropped it in the trash bin. Zelena watched as the drawing Alice had been working on for hours was tossed away like it meant nothing. She'd kept every single one in a box she had stored in her room. Or at least every one that had still been on the table when she'd come into the kitchen. Some were drawings of things Alice had seen around the house: her stuffed toy, the furniture, the doors; but others were far darker: something that looked like a belt with bloodstains, chains attached to a wall, shattered vials on a stone floor, and in all of them a little girl was sitting near it clearly terrafied. It was obvious how alone she'd felt for so long. The drawings saddened Zelena but she thought maybe one day Alice would want them. They were filled with detail and emotion.

"Alice. What are you doing?" Zelena didn't understand why Alice thought the art went into the garbage. She had seen random papers put in there, Zelena assumed.

"Done."

"Yeah you can be done. But why are you throwing it away?"

"Idon'twantit."

"I do," Zelena told her.

Alice blinked. She'd tried to give mother things she'd _written_ during her lessons but she didn't want those and they were useful. She'd thrown them away and told her that she didn't care about anything she did or made. Once she was finished practicing her writing she was supposed to just throw it away. And she did. Even the note she'd made to tell her she loved her. She'd heard mother say she loved the market. She'd wanted to give it to her. But she didn't bother. She'd tossed it and never thought about it much again. "Your drawings are amazing, Alice. You're really good at it. And they are not meant for the trash."

Alice had thought they'd all been thrown away. She tilted her head.

"Let me show you something."

Zelena walked away and came back with box. She opened the lid and pulled out a stack of papers. "I've kept all of them."

Alice didn't know what to do.

Zelena went over and pulled Alice's latest drawing out of the bin and put it in with the rest. "One day you may want these. And I'll have them, okay?"

Alice nodded. She didn't want them. They were just something to do that didn't terrify her.

Zelena knew right now Alice likely didn't realize how talented she was, or even that talent was a thing. She'd hold onto the drawings for her until she did.

Alice spent the rest of the day as she had started to. She still did the same things she always had but had finally managed to make it through an entire day without anyone telling her what to do.

Zelena was really happy for her.

A few days past with Alice not seeming to rely on anyone too much. She still spoke to Luna and asked her some questions, Zelena didn't think Alice would ever be able to do anything she was doing without Luna's help.

Alice had grown so much more confident that Zelena finally thought the market would be safe to take her to. She was still going to have Luna. And they'd taught Luna a command of following a specific person. No matter how panicked she got, Alice wouldn't be able to get lost.

"Okay, we've got this. Luna can follow us and if you get scared she's right there. If you get lost, she's right there. Ready?" Robin told Alice. Her encouraging tone not betraying her inner feelings of worry. The last time they'd tried this Alice had come rather close to dying. And she'd been through so much she deserved not to die before at least knowing what it felt like to be safe and happy.

Luna's leash was attached to Alice's waist. It'd taken a while to get Alice used to that but she was fine with it now.

They made it to the market and Alice and Luna trailed after Zelena.

Zelena kept glancing back but Alice was doin great. She kept reaching down to pet Luna, but that was a good thing. If she was touching Luna she wasn't in such a blind panic she couldn't walk in a straight line.

Someone bumped into Luna and Alice.

"Sorry."

"Watch it! And you can't have a dog here!" the man flung his arms up in a questioning stance.

Alice flinched. The man was loud and he looked like he was going to hit her for a second. Why couldn't Luna be with her? She needed Luna in order to feel safe. She'd get lost without her and then she'd get hurt. And she needed her so she could ask to move. It was different when she was at home, she finally thought of Robin's house as her home. She'd figured out how to handle doing things there. But there were _so many people_ here. And any one of them could be angry if they knew she didn't ask first.

Zelena turned back around and walked up to the stranger. "She's a service dog, and she very well can have her here." Zelena was pretty sure that was how that worked. That's how Regina had explained it.

"What's it for?"

Zelena sighed. What was the right words for _if I ever find the woman that made a child too scared to move to the point she needs a dog with her I'm going to destroy her at least twice_?

"Help," Alice whispered. Alice knew what Luna did for her but didn't know how to explain it. And this man seemed like he'd hurt of if she breathed wrong.

"Yeah, good job Alice but you don't have to answer his question."

Alice nodded.

"Someone needs to," the man was gruff and Zelena was annoyed. And it'd frightened Alice who sat down and let Luna lay in her lap.

"There, she's doing what she's trained to do, go away," Robin told him.

The man scoffed but walked away.

Alice sat there until she calmed down than got back up.

"Follow?" Alice whispered then pointed to Zelena. Luna followed her for the rest of the trip and they finially got everything they needed and circled back to the entrance of the market.

"Good job Alice, you did great," Robin told her. Alice had just been letting Luna lead her and comfort her when she got scared. She didn't think she could do this without her.

"Lunadid."

"yeah, I know Luna helped but you did it. We walked around the whole place I know that was scary," Robin was so excited. Alice nodded.

They went back home and Alice sat down and drew for a little while with Luna asleep at her feet.

They soon got into a new routine. Alice would come to the market with them about once a month and she was slowly getting better at it. She still couldn't handle going too often. And the number of people that demanded to know what Luna was for was suprising. Alice didn't know how to stand up for herself and often listening to people's questions while petting Luna hoping that whoever was talking to her would go away.

It was time for their monthly trip and Zelena had made something for Luna to wear that vaugely explained what Luna was for.

"There," Zelena told Alice as she finished attaching the patch to Luna's vest. "If anyone ask, you can just point."

Alice nodded.

They went to the market and someone approached Alice.

"Awwww, cute dog! Can I pet it?"

Alice flinched. How did she say no? The woman reached over and started petting Luna, distracting her from what she was supposed to be doing.

"What's she for?" the woman asked.

Alice shakily pointed to the patch Zelena had made.

_[Do not pet. I am here to help her make decisions and guide her through crowds. Do not distract.]_

"Oh, but it's fine isn't it? Nothing bad will happen if I pet her for just a few seconds."

Alice flinched but ignored the woman. She glanced ahead of her and realized she couldn't see Zelena or Robin any more.

"Follow?" Alice whispered and pointed in front of her. Luna would follow whoever she pointed to. But Zelena and Robin had gotten a ways ahead. So she started to guide Alice to the first person she pointed to. All around the maarket and straaight to the road. Luna stopped at the side of the road wher she saw a carriaage and laid down at Alice's feet. Luna's way of telling Alice not to go any further. They'd managed to train her that if she saw a carriage she needed to stop and refuse to let Alice walk in front of it.

The carriage driver got in then glanced over. He recgonized her.

"You're the girl that sat in front of my carriage a few months ago." He'd learned his lesson from when the girl's friend had yelled at him. He'd felt terrible for his part in damaging what sounded like progress that had taken a lot of effort to get to. He'd sworn he'd never treat someone that way again. And gotten the girl a gift. But then he hadn't seen her for months. He blamed himself for ruining what sounded like something she'd been struggling to be able to do. He'd kept it in his carriage. She looked older than she seemed to behave so he'd gotten her a book and a stuffed bear unsure on which she might like. He grabbed the bag out of his carriage. He'd held onto it in case he ever saw her again.

"Sorry," Alice whispered.

"No, it's okay." The driver read the patch on Luna. Guide her through crowds? Had she gotten seperated from whoever she'd been following? "Are you lost?"

Alice nodded.

"I think I can help. I'm Ian, what's your name?"

"Alice." she wondered if he wanted Luna's name to. Everyone else had been curious about her lately. "Luna." Alice gestured to the dog.

"Let's try to get you unlost, okay? Who are we looking for?"

"Zelena," Alice whispered.

"What's she look like?"

Alice told him she had red hair. It was more conversation than she'd had in a while but Luna was making her feel like it was okay. And this man was speaking to her the way Robin did. As if he was okay with her responding but still happy to maintain most of the conversation.

Alice nodded and pointed to Ian. "Follow."

She trailed behind him until they found Zelena standing with her back turned.

"Excuse me, miss," Ian approached. Zelena turnd on her heels and saw Alice standing there.

"I think she got lost."

"Oh thank you," Zelena told him. "Alice are you okay?"

Alice nodded. "Alright."

"And Alice," Alice looked at him. "This is for you. Wanted to apologize for how I treated you a few months ago." He handed her the bag and went to walk away.

"I'll be back, Alice. You stay with Robin, okay?"

Alice agreed and Zelena chased after Ian.

"Hey!"

He paused and looked at her. "How'd you know her name?"

"She told it to me."

"She's never said her name before. She usually takes weeks before she'll say anything at all. What was in the bag?"

"Wasn't sure how old she was so got her a book and a little stuffed bear."

"She loves stuffed animals. She has one she carries around everywhere in the house. Not so sure about the book."

"It's Alice in Wonderland, funny enough. Don't meet too many people with that name these days."

"My daughters favorite book, she didn't have a name when she found her so she named her that."

"You've got a good kid. Two actually. Your daughter laid into me while defending Alice a few months back."

Zelena wasn't suprised at all.

"Well, thanks for the help."

They went their seperate ways.

Slowly, Zelena added more and more outings for Alice. It took time but she finally got to a point where her getting scared wasn't a worry. The only issue was people bothering Luna but after some time Alice had learned how to tell people not to pet her.

The first time she'd done that Zelena had lost all composure and shown how happy she was.

They'd been out at the market, Alice happily listening to Robin tell her about some trick shot she'd done with her bow and a woman had approached her. It was clear Alice struggled more around women than men or younger kids. Which made complete sense. Her mother had been the one to beat her and hold her prisoner for a very long time.

"Can I pet your dog?"

Zelena was within earshot still and assumed Robin would have to step in.

Alice knew that if the woman did that she'd not feel safe and that Luna would likely no longer be able to follow Zelena and keep her safe.

"sorryno."

Zelena had blinked, forgetting that Alice was easily frightened.

"Yes! Good job Alice! That's amazing!" She was hyped up and excited for her.

Alice blinked. Why was Zelena acting like mother whenever she got a spell right?

She'd slowly stopped fearing questioning Zelena.

"Whatspellwereyoudoing?" she whispered.

"No. No spell. Just happy for you. Proud of you. Really really happy. Want to go get ice cream or something? We can go get ice cream."

The woman that had asked to pet Luna stared at her for a moment.

"She didn't do anything, and is plenty old enough to not need encouragement."

Zelena glared. "Long story. Come on Alice."

They left and went to get what Zelena had offered. Alice ate her food with Luna laying at her feet but she was confused. Why was Zelena so happy?


	25. Happy

Zelena's reaction to her not allowing someone to pet Luna had made Alice start to question a lot. She'd seen mother act like that. When a spell was done right, when a potion was the right color, when the market had had the right ingredient. She'd seen that behavior. She hadn't had a word for it. She always just appreciated it as the distration it gave mother. If she was doing that Alice was free of active pain for at least a few hours. She could just sit and watch as the things outside of the tower reminded her that she would never be near them. Of course, that always came to an end and sometimes mother had gone from one extreme to the next and become so unbelievably angry that Alice had started to wonder if the small break was ever worth it.

The word was _happy_. Mother had been _happy_ about things. They'd all been things for her magic. Zelena had said she was happy for Alice. That didn't make sense. How could she be happy for her?

"Happy?" Alice asked after finishing the ice cream.

"Yes, do you know what that means?" Zelena asked. Alice nodded. Kind of.

"Forme?"

"Yes, I'm happy for you. You're doing so good. I know it's really hard for you to say what you want and even harder for you to say no. I'm happy that you're learning how to do that. It's a good thing."

Alice nodded and continued with her thoughts. Mother had never been happy about anything Alice had ever done. Not anything she'd done the right way. Not anything she'd done wrong. The closest thing was whem she'd had the same weird facial expression right after she noticed Alice had fallen for a trick. But Zelena didn't seem to intend to hurt her. It'd been long enough now that if she was going to she would have done it already. Zelena wouldn't hurt her. The realization kicked into Alice's brain. Zelena. Would. Never. Hurt. Her. She'd told her this over and over again but it had felt like a lie. Some dream that she'd be woken from by sudden pain she'd let herself stop expecting. She had been wrong. Zelena was never going to harm her. It didn't matter what she did. There was nothing she could do that would make Zelena angry enough. And now she was okay with that.

"Youwon'thurtme." Zelena blinked. That wasn't a question. That was a statement of fact. Alice had finally gotten it! She understood.

"Never."

Zelena cried tears of joy.

Alice blinked. Had she upset her? "Whyareyoucrying?"

"Tears of happiness, Alice."

Everyone finished their food. And they went back home.

Alice drew something and folded it up. The next day she handed it to Zelena. Zelena was so proud of Alice she didn't think. She went to hug her.

Alice froze not sure what was happening. She no longer feared Zelena but what was happening? This didn't hurt but what was it?

Zelena pulled back quickly realizing that Alice wasn't comfortable. "Sorry."

"Whatwasthat?"

"It's a hug, Alice. It means I care about you. I'll put this with the rest of your art."

Alice shook her head. "Foryou."

"Oh. Thank you."

Luna started circling showing she needed the bathroom and Alice walked outside with her. Zelena opened the piece of paper and saw herself cheering.

And in Alice's handwriting _Thank you for being happy for me._

Zelena had it framed and hung it in her room. Alice finally felt safe. It'd taken months but Alice was no longer the scared little girl that had spent ages quiet begging to go back to a painful life because it was easier.

It'd been hell to get her there but she'd do it all again a thousand times over.

Zelena had decided Alice was finally stable enough to be able to move. She'd missed Regina and Henry who'd moved back to storybrooke not long before and they moved back to Storybrooke. Everyone in the town knew about Alice's situation quickly and there were far fewer problems with Luna.

Alice was sitting in the library Robin had walked her to. She was flipping through a dictionary and found the defintion of the word mother. She flinched at the word. _to bring up a chld with care and affection_. _See also_ mom,mum. Alice had learned how to laugh from one of Henry's younger family members and let out a small laugh.

Alice thought about it. Mother had never shown her any care. Zelena had. Mother had only ever been happy about her magic. Zelena had cheered whenever she did the slighest thing that was good. Mother had beaten her for any wrongdoing, Zelena had untaught every lesson mother had forced her to believe. Zelena had only ever made her feel like she mattered. Mother had told her the only reason she didn't let her bleed to death was because she cared for the market. Mother had chained her up when all she'd wanted was to play, Zelena had reacted to Alice's attempts at angering her with nothing other than kindness. Mother had made it clear she didn't want anything Alice made, Zelena had kept every single one, even framing a few. And she was happy she had now. Zelena was more her mother than mother would ever be.

**A year later, New York Art Gallery.**

Alice stood with Luna standing next to her, a little bow tie attached to Luna's collar. Alice pet Luna and listened as people bustled around the room.

She no longer needed someone to walk with her but she still never learned how to navigate crowds by herself and still occasionally had bouts of uncontrollable fear. She now knew logically that no one would hurt her but she still asked Luna for permission whenever she was out in public.

Zelena looked around the room, every wall had a drawing on it inside a frame. She knew she should have kept Alice's art. She was talented. And now she knew it too. She'd taken Henry's advice of sumbitting some of her work to an art gallery and they'd love it and she was opening her first show.

"Are you the artist?" someone asked her. Alice's communication skills had been improved a lot by some therapy with Dr. Hopper. "Alice Mills?" Zelena had legally signed adoption papers. That were slightly forged due to the part where she'd basically kidnapped her.

"Yes."

"These are amazing, great job. Nice to meet you."

Alice smiled. Really smiled. Something she'd never done as a child. "Thank-you."

The person walked away and Alice fielded more and more compliments. Luna helped keep her from panicking.

Finally Zelena, Robin, Henry, and Regina walked in. Alice had gotten used to Regina. It'd taken time and they'd never be that close but she stopped fearing her.

"I'm proud of you, Alice," Zelena told her. Alice smiled. Something she did so much more of now. "And I got you this."

Zelena handed her a small package. "Open it."

Alice gently took the paper off and looked at it. It was a framed drawing. The first one she'd ever made. Zelena had really kept _every single one._

"I love it," Alice hugged Zelena, tears of happiness in her eyes. She was loved. She was happy. The woman that had tortured her for years wasn't her family. This was. "Thanks mum!"


End file.
